Are Beast Nobles Supposed to Be This Lewd?

Chapter 50: Noble Courtship Should Be Illegal

Are Beast Nobles Supposed to Be This Lewd?

Chapter 50: Noble Courtship Should Be Illegal

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Chapter 50: Noble Courtship Should Be Illegal

The next morning, Mirabelle was escorted by a servant to one of the dining halls.

The other females were already seated along an enormous table bending beneath the sheer amount of food that had been prepared.

The scent of warm herbs, fresh fruit, and sweet baked roots drifted heavily through the air.

Morning light streamed through the enormous arched windows, turning the pale stone walls golden while dozens of conversations blended into a constant gentle hum beneath the high ceiling.

Elowen waved at Mirabelle the moment she entered.

"Mirabelle! We saved you a seat!"

The rabbit female’s bright voice echoed through the hall.

Smiling gratefully, the lynx female walked toward the group and slipped into the empty seat between Elowen and Lysandra before immediately loading her plate.

A female needed food, okay?

Mirabelle sat quietly between Elowen and Lysandra, focusing entirely on eating.

Mostly because it prevented people from asking her questions.

At the same time, she listened carefully to the conversations around the table.

Around her, the other females chatted easily while servants moved silently through the hall refilling drinks and replacing empty platters.

Occasionally Mirabelle caught snippets of conversation.

Cultivation.

Politics.

Males.

Mostly males.

Not far away sat Nessa together with several mouse females from her territory. The skunk female looked almost unbearably smug this morning, one leg crossed elegantly over the other while golden jewelry glittered against her dark dress.

One of the mouse females leaned closer excitedly.

"So it’s true? You officially accepted the lion?"

Nessa smirked lazily while lifting her cup.

"Obviously."

Several of the girls around her immediately squealed.

"Oh my god."

"You’re already mated?!"

"How was it?"

The skunk female’s grin widened further.

"Loud."

Mirabelle nearly inhaled juice directly into her lungs.

Beside her, Elowen started choking on laughter.

Meanwhile Nessa continued with the confidence of someone who genuinely enjoyed public suffering.

"Very loud," she clarified proudly.

One of the mouse females covered her burning face.

Another whispered, "I would literally die."

"You say that now," Nessa replied smugly, "but wait until a lion male looks at you like he wants to ruin your entire bloodline."

Mirabelle aggressively focused on buttering a roasted root.

She was absolutely not listening.

Absolutely not.

Elowen watched the scene across the table with enormous interest while slowly chewing on a piece of fruit.

Then she leaned slightly closer toward the others and whispered dramatically,

"That was a terrible decision."

Beside her, Lysandra immediately nodded.

"Absolutely horrible."

Caelia made a soft agreeing sound into her tea.

"Mhm."

Mirabelle blinked between them in confusion.

"...Didn’t you all literally say yesterday that the lion males were attractive?"

"They are attractive," Lysandra corrected instantly. "That’s the only good thing about them."

Nymeria calmly cut a piece of roasted root before speaking.

"The one Nessa accepted is Cassian Valebane."

The owl female said the name with the same tone scholars probably used while announcing natural disasters.

Elowen groaned dramatically and dropped her forehead against the table.

"I heard he challenged three males during last year’s summer gathering because one of them smiled at his female cousin."

Mirabelle paused mid-bite.

"...His cousin?"

"Second cousin," Lysandra clarified.

"As if that somehow improves the situation," Nymeria muttered.

Caelia quietly nodded again.

"He also broke someone’s arm over seating arrangements once."

Mirabelle stared.

"What kind of seating arrangement requires violence?"

"All of them if you’re a lion," Elowen replied immediately.

Lysandra sighed while swirling juice in her glass.

"The Valebane lions are powerful, but emotionally exhausting. They get possessive incredibly quickly."

"And territorial," Nymeria added.

"And loud," Elowen said.

"And dramatic," Lysandra continued.

"Mhm," Caelia contributed helpfully.

Mirabelle slowly looked back toward Nessa.

The skunk female was currently laughing while one of the mouse girls hid her burning face behind both hands.

Honestly...

Nessa looked thrilled.

"...Maybe she likes that?" Mirabelle suggested carefully.

All four females turned toward her at once.

Then Elowen pointed dramatically across the table.

"See? THIS is why sheltered females are dangerous."

Mirabelle looked offended.

"What does that mean?!"

"It means," Nymeria said calmly, "that you still think ’possessive lion male’ sounds romantic instead of being a danger to the harmony of your territory."

"Don’t you have a lion father?" Mirabelle asked, turning toward Lysandra.

The fox female frowned over a piece of beef jerky.

"How do you know that?"

Mirabelle, instantly thrown back to the scene she had witnessed the night before, hid her flushed face behind her glass and took a long sip.

Then she pretended to be intensely interested in the food on her plate and mumbled, "Ah... I think Leontes mentioned that yesterday."

Satisfied with the explanation, Lysandra turned back toward Nessa.

"The difference between my father and her new partner is that my father is the adopted son of a royal soldier. He was raised here, not among the Valebane lions."

"So basically," Mirabelle concluded slowly, "Nessa ended up with exactly the kind of partner she deserves."

A beat of silence followed.

Then all four females nodded at once.

"You summarized it perfectly," Lysandra sighed.

"Tragically compatible," Elowen agreed.

Nymeria took another sip of tea:

"Some unions are simply ordained by the gods."

Across the table, Nessa suddenly narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"...Why do I feel insulted?"

"Because you probably should," Elowen called back immediately.

The skunk female looked deeply offended.

Unfortunately, she clearly had no idea why.

Mirabelle hid a grin behind her cup before glancing around the enormous dining hall again.

"So..." she asked carefully, "does anyone actually know what kind of activities we’re supposed to do later?"

The reaction was immediate.

Elowen gasped.

Lysandra looked delighted.

Even Nymeria’s expression shifted slightly toward pity.

"Oh no," Caelia murmured softly.

Mirabelle immediately didn’t like that reaction.

Elowen leaned forward eagerly.

"The bonding trials."

"The what?"

"The noble bonding activities," Lysandra explained with the enthusiasm of someone discussing public executions.

"They hold them every year during courtship season so unmarried nobles can interact naturally."

Mirabelle already hated the word naturally.

Caelia tilted her head slightly.

"...How do you not know any of this?"

Mirabelle took another slow bite of roasted root.

"In my defense," she said after swallowing, "food was probably more important to me whenever someone tried explaining it."

Elowen snorted loudly.

Nymeria looked entirely unsurprised.

Mirabelle sighed dramatically and pointed her fork at them.

"Or maybe," she admitted, "my brain simply decided this information was too horrifying to retain."

Nymeria laughed and then began listing them calmly.

"There’s mounted archery in pairs. Territory negotiation games. Partner dances."

"Boat races," Lysandra added.

"Poetry exchanges," said Caelia.

Mirabelle blinked.

"...Poetry?"

"With audience voting," Elowen confirmed happily.

"There’s also the moonlight masquerade challenge," Lysandra continued. "Pairs have to identify each other while wearing enchanted masks that suppress scent recognition."

Mirabelle stared at them in horror.

"And then there’s the final activity," Elowen announced dramatically.

Everyone in their group suddenly became very interested in their drinks. 𝚏𝕣𝐞𝗲𝐰𝕖𝐛𝐧𝕠𝕧𝚎𝚕.𝐜𝚘𝗺

Mirabelle narrowed her eyes.

"...Why is everyone avoiding eye contact?"

Lysandra coughed delicately into her hand.

"The ballroom endurance trial."

Mirabelle waited.

No one elaborated.

"...Which means?"

Elowen looked her directly in the eyes.

"The males carry their chosen female partners through an obstacle course while the females give strategic instructions."

Mirabelle blinked.

"That sounds normal."

"It includes combat simulations," Nymeria clarified.

"...I’m sorry, what?"

"And territorial sabotage," Lysandra added.

"Last year two tiger males threw someone into a fountain," Elowen said cheerfully.

"Someone lost consciousness," Caelia contributed quietly.

Elowen suddenly lifted one finger.

"Oh. Did I mention the males are blindfolded?"

Silence.

Mirabelle slowly lowered her cup.

Okay.

Mirabelle was looking forward to this.

Not.

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