Beastmen Are Crazy, So I Sell Them Therapy

Chapter 96 - 94

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Chapter 96: Chapter 94

Sunday

The one day I had mentally reserved for sleeping, rotting in bed, and pretending beastmen didn’t exist.

Unfortunately, my life had decided to reject all three.

I stared at the pile of messages blinking aggressively at me like unpaid bills demanding attention.

"...I should’ve just died during training," I muttered as I opened the first one.

————————————

From: Agatha

My Lady, stocks are running low. Should I deliver the energy stones there? Also, there’s a huge demand for cat and dog beast energy stones.

————————————

’Business.’

My only source of sanity.

I straightened slightly, my brain immediately shifting into CEO mode.

Agatha was the only person in my life who wasn’t actively trying to ruin my peace.

A rare treasure.

————————————

To: Agatha

Yes. Deliver the stones here. Regarding the dog and cat energy stones—raise the price. I’ll also be releasing limited-edition high-energy stones. Triple the amount.

————————————

If people want bulk just to resell it then I’m afraid I’m going to crush their dreams.

Simple economics.

I moved to the next message.

————————————

From: Sykelion Vulpes

I know its the weekend but when will you visit the Renardon Estate? My client really needs you right now. I’ll triple your fee. Please reply as soon as possible.

————————————

I sighed.

"...Right. That client."

I may have forgotten them.

Repeatedly.

But in my defense—life has been trying to kill me lately.

Still...

Triple fee?

Now we’re talking.

————————————

To: Sykelion Vulpes

I’m coming today. Prepare the energy stones. I’ll personally select what fits the client. No need to prepare equipment—I’ll bring my own.

————————————

Money secured.

Peace slightly restored.

Dignity? Still missing.

I opened the next message and immediately frowned.

————————————

From: Sebastian Grimm

We’ll be having a group meeting today at 1 PM. Café near the academy.

Make sure you show up, Bella.

————————————

...

My eye twitched.

"...Bella?" I muttered then frowned.

WHO is Bella?

Why am I Bella?

When did I become Bella?

Do I look like a Bella?!

I sat up straighter, offended on a cellular level.

————————————

To: Sebastian Grimm

My name is not Bella. It’s BLANCA.

What? Have you also gone blind to the point where you keep calling me one of your girlfriends?

And no, I’m not available today. Just send the minutes of the meeting.

————————————

I hit send with the confidence of someone who had absolutely no intention of attending anything.

I’m finally at peace and opened the next message only to immediately lost all of it.

————————————

From: Stephano Rupera

Hey Troll, make sure you don’t ghost the group meeting, or we’ll be forced to give you the glorious honor of presenting in front—preferably with a clown nose.

Your choice!

————————————

"..."

Troll?

Troll???

I stared at the message then at my reflection on the screen.

"...Do I look like I live under a bridge?" I whispered.

Absolutely not.

If anything, I looked like I owned the bridge feeling sore, sleep-deprived, and dangerously close to violence but never a troll. 𝐟𝗿𝐞𝚎𝚠𝐞𝚋𝕟𝐨𝚟𝐞𝕝.𝕔𝕠𝚖

"You know what? You don’t deserve a reply."

With that decision made, I moved on to the next message.

————————————

From: Soren Markhelov

Blanca, it’s Sunday today. Will you be coming home?

————————————

I paused.

It’s very tempting but unfortunately I have a VIP client and unlike certain people who call me a troll, VIP clients come with money.

And I respect money.

————————————

To: Soren Markhelov

I can’t. We have a group meeting today and we’ll be presenting it for tomorrow.

————————————

A lie?

Yes.

Was it necessary?

Also yes.

I hit send and immediately escaped to the bathroom like a fugitive avoiding consequences.

Cold water hit my skin, and for a brief, beautiful moment, there was nothing.

No rankings.

No teammates.

No "Bella."

No Troll.

Just me and the quiet sound of water.

"...This is the life," I murmured, closing my eyes.

Peace.

Healing.

Rebirth—

Ping!

I ignored it.

Ping!

Still ignored it.

Ping! Ping! Ping!

My eye twitched.

"No," I said out loud, pointing at the door like the notifications could see me. "You will not ruin this moment."

The OmniSync continued relentlessly, persistently, and annoyingly. Like certain people I unfortunately knew.

I finished bathing, took my time drying off, and stepped out with the determination of someone who had decided to not care.

"...Ignore," I reminded myself.

I walked past the bed and walked straight to my wardrobe. After changing, I unconsciously glanced at it and regretted immediately.

The screen was lit up with multiple messages staring at me from multiple people.

My eye twitched again.

"...Just ignore them first," I whispered, backing away slowly like the device might attack me.

I sat down on the edge of the bed, looked at the ceiling, and took slow, deep breathes.

"...I deserve peace."

Ping!

"...I said," I whispered dangerously, "I deserve peace."

Ping!

My eye twitched.

Ping!

I lunged for the OmniSync like a warrior going into battle. "WHO IS IT NOW?!"

The moment I read the first three messages, survival instincts kicked in and it was the "abandon all dignity and escape through the nearest window" kind.

Before I could even think twice, I was already climbing over the balcony railing because why use the door like a civilized human being when you can dramatically escape like a criminal fleeing a crime scene?

"Second floor," I muttered, glancing down. "...That’s survivable."

Maybe and definitely not ideal but neither was facing a group of people waiting outside my door like I was some kind of wanted fugitive.

I jumped and naturally, my landing was messy and painful. I crashed straight into a bush, branches snapping, as my entire body protested immediately.

"—Ow!" I hissed, clutching my side as pain immediately spread like it had been waiting for this exact moment.

"Great," I muttered. "As if Gawain’s nightly torture trainings weren’t enough."

Still, I survived.

I pushed myself up, only to freeze.

Because right in front of me were two students aggressively kissing each other, like they were trying to consume each other’s existence.

"...Wow," I said flatly.

They jumped apart like I had just detonated a bomb between them.

I brushed leaves off my clothes, glaring at them like I hadn’t just committed balcony-related crimes.

"Get a room, will you?!" I snapped, pointing at them like an offended grandmother. "Do you think no one is watching right now?!"

"Y-Yes ma’am—" they both blurted out automatically before pausing as they stared at me.

"...Wait," the guy frowned. "How dare you speak like that? You’re the same age as us!"

I straightened, fixing my hair like I hadn’t just fallen from the sky like a disgruntled angel.

"So?" I shot back. "Are you planning to continue here? What’s next—full performance?"

Their faces turned so red I half-expected steam to come out of their ears before they hurried off like scandalized extras in a romance drama.

"...Good," I muttered, brushing leaves off my sleeves. "Fear me."

With what dignity I had left—which was hanging by a thread—I marched toward the portal station when I saw them.

’What bad luck.’

They were walking out of the building like a group of villains in a low-budget drama.

Gawain and my wonderful, beloved, absolutely annoying teammates.

I stopped.

They stopped.

We stared at each other like opposing armies before war.

Silence.

Before anyone could even breathe, I pointed dramatically in the opposite direction and shouted at full volume,

"LOOK! Vivienne Rosenthal is wearing the latest dress from Beasté Élegance Boutique!"

It actually worked.

Their heads snapped so fast I heard at least one neck crack but I didn’t care as I ran full speed, ignoring my body screaming in pain from the fall.

Freedom was within reach, I could taste it. I was this close to escaping when—

"Going somewhere, My Lady?"

I almost tripped mid-run when I turned my head to see Gawain catching up beside me like this was a casual morning jog.

"Damn it," I hissed. "Don’t you ever fall for anything?!"

"Not when it involves you," he said pleasantly.

"I have somewhere else to go!" I snapped, picking up speed.

"Then I’ll wait until you tell me where," he replied, still smiling.

I hated that smile.

Not the polite one he used in public, or the mildly annoying one he wore when he was pretending to be normal.

He was wearing the "I’ve already planned five different ways to defeat you and you don’t even know how to properly hold your weapon yet" smile.

And the worst part?

He only ever wore it when we were in a sparring session which meant—

SWING!

A blade sliced through the air where my head had been a second ago as I ducked just in time.

I whipped around, eyes wide. "Have you gone insane?!"

"Always have been, My Lady," he said casually, already swinging again.

Unbelievable.

Absolutely unbelievable.

I gritted my teeth and summoned my weapon on instinct—thank you, trauma—and barely managed to parry his attack.

CLANG!

The impact rattled through my arms.

"YOU’RE FIRED!" I yelled, blocking another strike.

He didn’t even blink. "How many times has that been now?"

"This time it’s permanent!"

"You don’t pay me."

"That’s not the point!"

My whip sword snapped forward again, faster this time, more responsive than before but it twisted mid-swing like it had its own personality.

’A violent one, if I add.’

"Oi—wait—wait—! NOT THAT WAY—!"

Slash.

"OW!" I yelped as the blade nicked my leg.

I stumbled back, glaring at the weapon. "You see that?!" I snapped. "It attacked me!"

"Focus, My Lady," Gawain said calmly, already closing the distance.

Clang!

I barely managed to block his incoming strike, my grip shaky as the whip sword coiled and uncoiled unpredictably in my hand.

"I am focused!" I shot back. "I’m focused on not dying!"

"You’re distracted."

"I’m injured!"

"You did that to yourself."

"I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR SELF-HARM TRAINING!"

He moved again, faster this time.

I tried to counter, flicking the whip sword forward the way he’d shown me before.

The result?

Complete chaos.

The blade snapped outward, curved, then whipped back.

"WHY DOES IT BOOMERANG?!" I shrieked, ducking just in time to avoid decapitating myself.

Gawain didn’t even look surprised. "My Lady," he said, circling me like a patient predator, "your weapon reflects your state of mind."

I froze. "...Excuse me?"

"It’s unstable because you are."

I stared at him. "...I’m about to make you unstable."

He smiled again which immediately gave me the creeps so I lunged, the whip sword extended wildly, missing him completely and wrapping around a nearby tree instead.

I blinked. "That... wasn’t where I want it to be."

Gawain glanced at the tree then at me. "...You’ve restrained the wrong target."

"I KNOW!"

I yanked but the whip didn’t budge.

I yanked harder.

Still nothing.

I stumbled back, mind racing for an escape plan.

Think.

Think fast.

Think brilliant.

"Look!" I shouted suddenly. "There’s the limited edition XR-21 Spectra!"

He didn’t even blink. "I’m not falling for that—"

"With a modified barrel!"

"...WHERE?!" he said, instinctively glancing around.

’Got him.’

"Right there—BEHIND YOU!"

The moment his attention shifted, I snapped my whip sword forward, hooking his leg cleanly and yanking it hard.

He stumbled down, his face planting first on the ground.

I didn’t stay to admire my work as I ran again.

"I’LL REMEMBER THIS, MY LADY!"

"YOU ALREADY REMEMBER TOO MUCH!" I yelled back, not even bothering to turn around.

Branches slapped against my arms as I sprinted through the path, my lungs already filing with complaints.

"...I just wanted a peaceful Sunday," I wheezed, dodging a passing student who nearly got dragged into my problems.

Behind me, the footsteps multiplied.

"They’re still chasing me, aren’t they?" I whispered to myself, already knowing the answer.

"BELLA! STOP RUNNING!" someone shouted.

"YOU’RE CHASING THE WRONG PERSON, FOOL!" I screamed back.

"TROLL, GET BACK HERE!"

I gasped mid-run. "Oh, you really want to die today, don’t you?!" I snapped over my shoulder.

Meanwhile, students turned their heads to watch as I sprinted past them.

Some stepped aside, some just stared, and one of them even clutched his friend like we were a natural disaster passing through.

’Just a little bit more...’

I was almost near the gates when I saw Dmitri Grant standing off to the side, calmly holding a cup of coffee like he wasn’t witnessing a full-blown chase scene.

My eyes brightened immediately.

’He was my last hope, my salvation, my savior!’

"SIR GRANT!" I cried, changing direction so fast I almost slipped on my own foot. "I’m being harassed—"

He looked at me before looking at the incoming chaos—Gawain leading the charge like a man on a mission then at the rest of my equally unhinged teammates following behind—then looked back at me.

He released a deep, disappointed sigh before shaking his head. "...Unbelievable."

My eye twitched. "Sir, I am the victim here—"

"...Why were they chasing you?"

"I don’t know!" I lied immediately. "They woke up and chose violence!"

"Then run faster," he said flatly.

I froze. "...What?"

"If you don’t want to get caught," he added, already turning away, "then don’t slow down."

I feel betrayed, abandoned, and emotionally wounded. "...You’re supposed to be a teacher!"

"I am."

"Then act like one!"

"I am."

"...This is terrible mentoring!"

Behind me, the footsteps were getting closer now.

"MY LADY—"

Nope.

No time.

I turned and bolted again. "THIS ACADEMY IS A SCAM!" I yelled as I ran.

Dmitri only raised his cup slightly.

"...Hopeless," he muttered before taking another sip of his coffee.

Meanwhile I was still running for my life because apparently in this academy, survival of the fittest wasn’t a lesson.

It was a daily routine.

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