Became the Patron of Villains
Chapter 468: Fragment (7)
"...How did you know?"
Seollang's calm voice rang in his ears.
"......"
"......"
Alon looked at Seollang in silence.
Instead of the smile that was always on her lips, there was only indifference.
The upward curve at the corners of her eyes had settled calmly as they faced him.
The tail that had been swaying now hung limp.
"......"
Her appearance was Seollang's, exactly as Alon knew it.
Her golden hair too.
Her eyes too.
There was nothing about her that had changed from Seollang.
And yet, even so, she was different from Seollang.
"Master, how did you figure it out?"
Seollang's voice came again.
Not the clear, ringing voice she usually had when she was excited, but a composed, calm voice, one that felt unbearably unnatural to Alon, who had known Seollang.
Listening to that voice, Alon thought,
'How did I figure it out...'
There were not many ways he could have noticed the change in Seollang.
Because until now, she had been Seollang as usual.
The tail that wagged.
The eyes smiling as if she were happy.
The playful smile on her face.
There was not a single thing about her that was not Seollang.
In fact, even Lime and the others who had always supported her had not realized Seollang had changed.
But Alon had been able to notice it.
Because just as Seollang sincerely conveyed her feelings to Alon,
he too had received much from Seollang.
That was why—
"The first was your eyes."
Alon spoke evenly.
Seollang's calm eyes seemed to be directed at him.
But her eyes were not, in fact, looking exactly at Alon.
From the very beginning until now,
her gaze had been passing by him, aimed subtly somewhere else.
And Alon knew very well when Seollang could not properly meet someone's eyes.
"When you can't look someone in the eye, it's always when something has made you uneasy."
"......"
"Back then too, after you dealt with the Divine blood, and even after we met again, you couldn't meet my eyes."
And when something made her uneasy like that, instead of smiling and talking, Seollang would whine and throw herself into Alon's arms.
Because Seollang was always honest about her emotions.
"The second was your tail."
"My tail?"
"...You were always wagging it."
Whenever Seollang met Alon, her tail always swayed.
That did not mean it did so every moment she was with him.
"Even when you were doing nothing in the carriage and staring blankly into empty space, and even at the crowded festival."
As far as Alon knew, she hated enduring boredom.
And large crowds as well.
There was more evidence besides that Seollang had been acting.
But—
"...I see."
Even though he had not bothered to finish the rest, Seollang nodded as if she understood what he meant.
Far too emotionless to be the usual Seollang.
"Can you tell me what happened?"
Alon asked cautiously,
and Seollang looked at him in silence.
Before they knew it, silence had settled between them.
"......"
Seollang opened and closed her mouth several times.
Rather than pressuring her, Alon waited calmly for her to speak first.
After a brief stretch of time passed like that—
"I might not be Seollang."
"...What?"
She let out a single sentence.
A sudden confession.
Alon asked back reflexively.
Seollang, now with calm eyes, continued her explanation in an even tone.
The whole time she spoke, she somehow looked resigned, as if she had given up.
"...This is what happened."
When all of it was over,
Alon was deeply shaken.
It was the kind of story that would do that.
"So, to summarize... you're saying that until now, your ✪ Nоvеlіgһt ✪ (Official version) mental age had been fixed at the time you were using the Golden Mane Tribe's essence?"
"Yeah, that's right."
"And the power you showed before—the power you gained after perfectly completing the trial given by the Golden Mane Tribe's essence?"
"Yeah."
There was no emotion on Seollang's face.
Alon let out a deep sigh.
For the moment, he had roughly confirmed the details from Seollang, but there was still something he could not understand.
Namely, that the power Seollang had gained through the final trial in the Golden Mane Tribe's essence—the power she had used before when she killed the Divine blood—was the power of Monster blood.
'What in the world... is Monster blood?'
But soon he shook his head.
He was extremely curious about what Monster blood was, but it was not important right now.
What mattered to Alon right now was Seollang alone.
"...And you're saying there are memories from dozens of people in your head right now too?"
"Yeah. But strictly speaking, it's not just memories."
"...Then what is it?"
"Their identities and values are all mixed together too. Inside me."
"......"
"You know, Master."
At Seollang's call, Alon looked at her.
Her expression was calm.
And yet, somehow, it also looked empty.
"...I don't feel anything for the guild members anymore."
She murmured.
Still calm.
"Even when Lime worries about me, I don't really feel anything."
She murmured.
Still calm.
"Even when I think of Deus or Radan... it's just... that."
She murmured.
Still calm, but Alon could see it.
The deep emptiness in her eyes—
and sorrow.
Drip, drip.
"...Now, it doesn't affect me at all."
Seollang was still calm.
But there was clear sorrow and emptiness in her eyes.
"What should I do?"
As if she were wandering in deep darkness.
"What am I supposed to do?"
...Searching for those withered feelings she could no longer feel.
"Master... I... don't know..."
At some point, she clutched her own hand as it began to tremble.
"I really don't know... what I'm supposed to do..."
"......"
It was contradictory.
She was suffering because she was too dried out.
Without even knowing what she was suffering over.
Alon stared blankly at her.
He tried to say something, but after fumbling several times, he finally closed his mouth.
He knew.
He had thought that perhaps she might be in a situation like this.
And if that was the case, he also knew he should comfort her.
It was not simply that he knew it.
It was something he had to do.
He had to comfort her.
He understood clearly what needed to be done.
And yet the reason he kept his mouth shut was because he knew one more thing.
That some clumsy comfort from him could become poison to Seollang.
...Seollang had lost something precious.
Someone else might reduce it to mere memories and values, but Alon knew.
To Seollang, it was something that could not be replaced by anything.
"......"
Alon had never lost something precious before.
Because of that, he did not know how deeply a wound like that could remain.
That only made it more frightening.
He was afraid that a few careless words of comfort might only make her wound worse.
And yet he could not do nothing, so Alon stepped toward Seollang and quietly took her hand.
In his mind, countless words of comfort formed and disappeared again and again.
Some were nothing but formalities.
Some were utterly hypocritical.
Not a single one pleased Alon.
So—
"...Seollang."
Alon decided to simply speak the truth that came to mind.
"You acted at first."
"...Yeah."
"Why was that?"
"That was—"
"Wasn't it because you wanted to hide it from me? Because you didn't want me to know that you'd changed?"
"......"
Seollang did not answer.
But Alon continued in a low voice.
"Then that means I'm still there, doesn't it?"
"...Master is?"
"Yes. If you tried to hide what happened to you, then it would have been because you didn't want me to find out. Because you didn't want me to worry."
More than comfort, it was nothing but forcing pieces into place.
Even he thought it was a pathetic deduction.
And maybe every bit of Alon's reasoning was wrong.
"...So that means I'm still there. To you."
Even so.
Alon wanted Seollang to accept this feeble deduction.
...He hoped that at least a little sincerity would reach her through his unimpressive words.
"And if I'm still there, then the others must still be there inside you too."
"......"
"It's just that—right now, you're confused. You've had to go through too much, all at once."
"...Do you really think so?"
At Seollang's tearful murmur, Alon was silent for a moment before he spoke. 𝑓𝘳𝘦𝑒𝑤𝑒𝘣𝘯ℴ𝘷𝘦𝓁.𝑐𝑜𝑚
"Even if... even if that isn't true, that's alright."
"......"
"We didn't start out in a relationship like this from the beginning."
"......"
"Relationships can always be built again."
"......"
"You treasure your relationship with me, Seollang. I feel the same way."
"......"
"Any time, as many times as it takes, we can build it again. From the beginning, one step at a time."
Seollang did not answer Alon's words.
She only pulled him into a tighter embrace.
...For Alon, that was enough.
For a long while, Alon patted Seollang on the back.
"Do you feel a little better now?"
"...Yeah. Thank you, Master."
Seollang looked up at Alon and smiled faintly.
Only then did it seem she had regained some peace of mind.
The confusion and emptiness from before had faded at least a little, and her face looked better than it had earlier.
"Then I should get going."
"You're leaving already...?"
"If you want, I can stay with you a little longer."
At that, Seollang seemed to think quietly for a moment, then shook her head.
"No, it's okay."
"...Really? If you need anything, tell me."
"Yeah, okay, Master."
Seollang spoke calmly, but with a faint smile.
After watching her for a moment, Alon left a short goodbye and went outside.
And after the door closed—
the smile on Seollang's face—
"...I wish you hadn't noticed."
—turned blank again.
"......"
Listening to the sound of footsteps slowly fading away, Seollang brushed back her hair.
'Relationships can always be built again.'
Alon's words passed through her mind.
"......"
Alon was not wrong.
If Seollang tried, and if Alon tried,
then someday they might be able to build up a relationship like the one they had before.
But—
could a relationship built that way really be called the same as before?
Alon already knew that Seollang had changed.
He knew too that she was no longer the Seollang she used to be.
That she was now someone completely different, merely wearing Seollang's outward appearance—he now knew all of that for certain.
And yet, a relationship built on top of that?
It could never be the same as before.
Because Alon surely knew it too.
That the relationship would not be with "Seollang,"
but with "the one using Seollang's traces gathered together."
"......"
Seollang knew that Alon was kind.
She knew he would never show it.
But that did not change the truth.
"......"
Seollang sat down where she was, drew up her knees, and buried her head.
...It was a chilly autumn.
But somehow,
it felt unbearably cold.
"Haa..."
Back in his room, Alon let out a light sigh.
He had expected it, but Seollang's condition was worse than he had thought.
'...Yeah. Thank you, Master.'
Alon recalled Seollang's words from earlier.
Her voice had definitely sounded much more at ease than before, and yet Alon could still hear the emptiness hidden inside it.
And because of that, he could still realize it.
That his comfort may have helped, but it had not become a perfect solution.
"......"
Alon rubbed his face.
His thoughts were tangled.
But because of that, he also thought it was fortunate.
Since Alon had already been expecting Seollang's condition,
he had already been creating magic for her.
"...Just a little more."
Now, just a little more, and he would be able to complete the magic.
A magic that could return her to her original state.
"......"
Having reached that thought, Alon instinctively raised his mana.
It was a little dangerous without Penia there, and he was slightly tired after going around the festival, but even so, Alon did not stop casting the magic.
For some reason, he felt like doing it.
A small light spilled out through the window of the inn room.
At that same time, in the Eastern Empire.
The Darkness-Eating Sword, one of those called the latecomers to Star Root,
and currently locked in a heated competition(?) with the Burned Vegetation, had seen that being recruit Divine blood and, with its competitive spirit stirred, had personally come out here to recruit newcomers separately as well.
[...Is it true that the Star Eater Himself will be participating in the subjugation as Divine blood?]
[It seems so. It looks like that side has already begun moving as well.]
[The Burned Vegetation too?]
[Yes.]
After hearing the Divine blood's report—
[At last, I will be able to serve by His side.]
—as if the chance had finally come, it smiled deeply.