So he had climbed all the way to the summit.

The thought struck as I struggled against a shattering headache and waves of nausea. Too much had come crashing in at once, and it hurt to bear. Yehyeon’s worried hand on my arm felt far away.

The utensil in my grip warped under my clenched strength as my brows drew tight.

The memories would not subside.

“Golden eyes, is that your people’s trait?”

Refined pronunciation, movements full of a natural nobility I could never mimic. The image of a chiseled face, perfectly fitted in a suit, appeared vividly behind my eyelids.

Whenever he spoke with me, he would fix me with those cool blue eyes.

“And white hair?”

“Hair color is varied enough among us.”

I had answered him like that once, lounging on a sofa.

“Don’t many of you have white hair too?”

He °• N 𝑜 v 𝑒 l i g h t •° had been one of the sharpest minds I ever encountered.

Even at a young age, his brilliance could not be concealed. From the very first time, he was already sprinting up the steps of power, hitting every stone far faster than others. That was why he crossed paths with me.

With me... with us.

“You’re sticking close to that man lately.”

Kyle’s voice rang in my ears.

“Do you like him? Sharp fellow, sure, but not the type to give your heart to.”

“And he wouldn’t be asking for it either.”

I had laughed, answering Kyle.

“We simply can’t ignore each other.”

Earth in peace. An open-air café under the sun. People wearing sunglasses, ice cream melting in their hands under the merciless heat. The slow movements in the thick warmth.

The summer smell that wrapped around the body.

The blue sea and white surf breaking lazily. A drowsy afternoon, so peaceful it swallowed me whole. There had been such a time, tranquil enough to make one think maybe things could stay that way forever.

And unbelievably, that peace had lasted for quite a while.

I had watched Colton grow older. From an ambitious young man into a giant heavy with authority. His influence swelled terrifyingly fast. Outwardly, he called our relationship “friendship.” Even though he did not know what friendship was.

“Hildebert.”

I remembered when he began to look much like he did now.

“Have you decided?”

“Yes.”

I remembered how my heart nearly tore answering him.

“It was going to happen eventually.”

What was?

That part, I could not recall. A violent migraine pulsed as I clenched my fist. Was it a defense mechanism?

Perhaps my instincts refused to bring up that miserable memory. I could not remember why that peace was shattered, why I betrayed my kin. I could barely remember what made me different from humans in the first place.

Stupid brain. Remember.

Don’t look away from what you did. Remember it.

Remember it!

My body shook hard.

“Get a grip.”

Yun’s cold voice snapped me awake.

“Hildebert.”

His chill tone brought back all my senses.

The present returned. I panted, catching sight of my seniors. Yun gripping my arm hard, eyes narrowed. Yehyeon watching me with worry carved into his gaze.

Noise had filled the ballroom again.

Colton seemed to have vanished into the crowd. I blinked several times, trying to steady my ragged breath.

A drop of sweat fell from my lashes.

“Should I call a doctor?” Yehyeon whispered, heavy with concern.

I shook my head.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re drenched in cold sweat. Hilde. Let’s step out for a moment.”

“I’m fine.”

I insisted again, lowering my gaze to avoid their eyes. I forced my breath steady, fighting the stabbing headache. I couldn’t leave.

Not when these memories had just returned. Not when I had just met someone from my past.

There were things I had to say to him.

Yun’s voice cut, icy.

“I’ll drag you to Ami’s place so you can rest there.”

“I really am fine.”

“Sure you are. Collapse here and you’ll be even more trouble. Just obey.”

“Give me five minutes.”

I refused to leave.

“I’ll be fine in five minutes.”

My seniors waited in silence.

I didn’t move, only focused on my body. Likely some violent defense mechanism had triggered. But Yun was right — I couldn’t afford to lose myself here. I abandoned digging through the past and listened to my heartbeat instead.

The sound of my heart always helped me calm down.

Five minutes later, I exhaled evenly and raised my head.

“I’m fine now.”

They stared at me.

I ignored their sharp eyes, stretching my neck. The crowd had grown lively again, and Colton was nowhere to be seen.

Where did he go?

“He—”

“Not now.” Yehyeon cut me off.

I met the Commander’s gaze. His eyes still carried worry, but of a different kind now.

He spoke softly.

“Go when he calls you.”

I gave a dry laugh.

“Yes. That’s the kind of man he was. I remember now. He’s surely even worse these days.”

“You seem to know him better than I thought,” Yehyeon murmured, half-lowering his eyes.

“I only know that you two are acquainted. I don’t know the details.”

“I don’t remember everything either. Only the time we spent together in what he called ‘friendship.’”

“Friendship?”

Yun’s brow arched, like he’d just heard the most ridiculous thing.

I let out a short laugh. His reaction was expected. Colton Wiseman was colder even than Yun.

A man born cold and cruel. Worse than Yun in his hunger for power. With natural elegance and charisma concealing his nature, and a brilliant mind to carry out his ambitions. Yun at least cared for Yehyeon and Ami. Colton saw everyone as pieces on a board.

With one possible exception.

Though even that, I could never be sure.

I lifted my heavy eyelids to suppress the nausea.

“He called it friendship. But it was just a formal, mutually convenient relationship. I can’t recall why it was like that. Too much came rushing back all at once.”

“You look like you’re about to vomit.”

“Honestly, yes.”

“Want me to knock you out and drag you out?” Yun asked casually to Yehyeon.

I looked at my mentor with disbelief. Who says that to a subordinate about to throw up? But he ignored me.

Yehyeon shook his head slowly, eyes full of worry.

With a sigh, he closed his eyes and scolded Yun out of habit.

“You don’t treat a sick man like that.”

“You do when he won’t listen.”

“I still have someone I need to find.”

I leaned back, palms resting on the armrests, blinking sweat from my lashes until my vision cleared again. The ballroom looked similar on the surface but felt utterly changed since Colton’s appearance.

I swept the glittering venue, searching for a face. Not Colton — someone beside him. Someone I hadn’t paid enough attention to earlier.

“Jaeyeon.”

The name slipped out, and then I found him.

He sat slouched at Colton’s side, opposite a heavyweight politician at the table, watching me. His smile was crooked, one elbow hooked lazily over his chair.

Foxlike upturned eyes and a well-shaped nose.

Curly black hair, black suit with white pinstripes. He looked like a sleek model. Still that same foxlike beauty.

Yes. Those eyes and that nose — Jaeyeon boasted them whether he appeared male or female.

And his eyes always blazed with hatred. 𝕗𝐫𝚎𝗲𝘄𝐞𝕓𝐧𝕠𝘃𝕖𝐥.𝐜𝚘𝚖

A hatred so fierce no one else could have endured it, consuming everything around him. Why did he hate me more than anyone? I couldn’t remember. Judging from the barrage of texts he had once sent me, I had certainly done something.

Jaeyeon curved those long eyes into crescent moons as he looked at me.

Then he blew me a kiss.

Fuck.

The one and only (or so it seemed) exception to Colton Wiseman’s coldness, still burning with madness.

“Just seeing that face makes me want to vomit.” I muttered.

“Exactly,” Yun agreed. “One look and you feel sick. Now I understand how you survived meeting him.”

“Jaeyeon, building a cottage for me...?” The thought turned my stomach.

“Can’t we just blow it up?”

Yehyeon exhaled a heavy sigh.

When I turned, I noticed my pale Commander looked even worse than I did. So pale I hadn’t believed it possible.

Eyes lowered, he let out a long breath.

“So you knew Jaeyeon too.”

“Yes. Not everything came back, but some did... More importantly, are you alright, Commander? You look terrible.”

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.” Yun’s cold voice cut across his husky one.

Yun’s brows were drawn tight as he glared at Yehyeon.

“You’ve never been fine when that bastard was involved.”

Right. Jaeyeon especially hated Yehyeon.

Why? Why me too?

What happened between them?

Though the truth was, even without a reason, Jaeyeon’s hatred was enough to damn anyone. But for someone to be especially hated, there had to be a cause.

I wanted to ask a thousand questions, but I knew it wasn’t the time. I could barely handle my own flood of memories.

On the table sat cooling Darjeeling tea and buttered bread.

Yehyeon stared silently into his teacup, then whispered.

“With his master sitting next to him, he’ll wait until after this gathering to act.”

“Oh, that’s such a relief.”

“Hilde.”

I met Yehyeon’s gaze. His eyes, always carrying sadness, narrowed.

“He came here for you.”

“Yes. I thought so too.”

“Whatever slip you make, you won’t die. We agreed — no matter what, you won’t be killed.”

So they had made that kind of pact.

Was that why he no longer hid things from me? Why he let me into the Core even though Jaeyeon hated me?

It seemed likely. But I didn’t ask.

Instead, I nodded slowly.

“Thank you.”

“Still, be careful. Not being able to kill you doesn’t mean they can’t hurt you.”

The Commander’s bitter smile seared into me.

In those sorrowful eyes, there was something new — weary resignation.

“Be careful. He’s at the summit now.”

***

An hour later.

Colton Wiseman, my old friend, true to himself, summoned me in the smoothest way imaginable.

Through Foden, he called me to his table.

God. I had forgotten Foden even existed. But yes — it had been Colton who handed me the invitation.

Before the cold charisma of the elderly man, Foden stood frozen.

I glanced at him in surprise, then turned my eyes to Colton seated at the table.

The man kept his face blank, eyes lowered, lifting his teacup.

“Mr. Wiseman.”

Hello.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you. I am Hildebert Taleb.”

That was how I had greeted him, the very first time I ever met him.