I hauled myself up, hollow-eyed, and sat upright.

The moment Yun saw that I had moved, he pushed himself up too. He was wearing a thin windbreaker and joggers again today. It looked like he was getting ready for his morning exercise.

Exactly the same as always.

I forced my heavy eyelids open and squeezed out a hoarse voice.

“Yun.”

“Just so you know, those two were asking this and that, so I made something up for them.”

Yun spoke in the flat tone of someone going over the day’s schedule.

Then, keeping that same tone, he added, “Told them you were the party leader.”

“What?”

What the—?

I was so incredulous my voice cleared. Sleep fled in an instant. I snapped my swollen eyes wide open.

“Suddenly? What party... You mean a political party? Why would I be the party leader?”

“Because you needed a reason to be acquainted with some big-name informants.”

Yun looked down at me as if I were asking something obvious.

There was no particular emotion in his cold eyes today either.

“Just remember it roughly. The you before you lost your memory was the leader of a party that no longer exists, the people who were in your party are all dead, and because of that you had flashbacks and vomited in the bathroom.”

“Of all the professions, why pick ‘party leader’?” I asked.

“Would you have been a lawyer or a doctor?” he countered.

“What about the game I came from?”

“I explained it in the same vein. Seems the people in your party had bestowed a work upon you.”

“You actually believed that?”

“You wouldn’t. But what are you going to do if you do not believe it?”

My mentor pointed that out bluntly.

I opened my mouth to argue, then closed it again. He was right. What would I do if I did not believe it? The old spider would not spill more information, and there was nowhere left to pry.

It was connected to Colton. The dangerous comrades had surely eliminated everyone who knew about that time.

Walker would likely suspect me and run his own inquiry, but even the most brilliant fixer would find nothing. It was nearly impossible to uncover what the elders had determined to hide.

I let out a heavy sigh.

Once again I had skirted danger with an absurd lie. The falsehood swelled, but there was no other choice.

Anything tied to the elders and the Titans belonged to truths better left buried.

I was a little thrown—the excuse was far beyond anything I would have expected.

If the two seniors asked separately, I decided, I would have to keep up a thick face.

I settled my resolve and cleared one problem concerning the seniors.

Then I lowered my gaze and replayed what I had learned yesterday.

Self-disgust welled up.

“Until now I told myself there must have been a reason for the betrayal,” I said, looking down and muttering bitterly. “But to sit in the leader’s seat and drive your own people away... No matter what reason you had, the sins you committed won’t be justified.”

“First, hand over the game,” Yun said, ignoring my gloomy muttering as he extended his palm.

This man really....

I lifted my head and glared sullenly at my mentor.

“Comfort your distraught subordinate a little, please.”

“Why?” Yun’s eyes rounded.

Confusion showed in the enlarged eyes. Seeing the suspicion in his gaze, I opened my mouth a little.

Good heavens.

This man truly did not understand.

I stared at my mentor with a stunned look.

“No... It’s been revealed I was a piece of trash,” I said.

“Why you?” he asked.

“You were the leader and yet you betrayed your people. You didn’t protect them even at the cost of your life.”

“How did you betray them?”

...Exactly.

I lost my words for a moment, then answered foolishly, “I don’t know the exact details.”

“Then why are you whining about things you don’t even know properly?”

“Anyway, it’s certain I sided with humans. I even handed a sword to be used to kill Rei with human hands. It’s similar to Yehyeon selling out the Badgers under him.”

“Do you remember who started the war?” Yun asked in an objective tone.

I slumped on the cabin floor and stared blankly up at my mentor.

I sifted through my memories carefully, but the crucial parts eluded me. Only shards remained—memories from the decayed subway, Kyle and the betrayed expressions of my people.

I stopped digging and shook my head.

“I don’t remember.”

“So you don’t know who was at fault. Stop acting pathetic and get up.”

His offered hand did not withdraw.

Thick-fingered, with a long scar cutting diagonally across his palm.

One glance told me it was a deep knife scar. A wound from the battlefield, or something else—the hand was nothing like Colton Wiseman’s smooth, elegant hands.

Why had I taken Colton Wiseman’s hand...?

Just as that thought began to deepen, Yun’s voice dropped from above.

“If you keep this up I’ll hand you over to Richard.”

I shot up to my feet.

I met my mentor’s level gaze as he cocked an eyebrow.

I looked at his composed face and forced a bright smile.

“The game is in my pocket right now, respected senior.”

“Is that so? Hand it over.”

“Could I give it to you after I finish it?”

I plastered a smiling expression across my face and groped around.

My hand found the cigar box that had been on the bedside table. I snatched it up and placed it neatly on Yun’s outstretched palm.

“Premium cigars sent by Spitfire, senior. They should be good—have one.”

“Since when did you smoke cigars?”

Yun glanced down at the cigar box indifferently.

“Worse than cigarettes,” he said.

“If you don’t smoke often, they’re not that bad.”

“What will you even do after finishing that game?”

He plucked a cigar from the box and asked as he handed the box back. I blinked, accepting it. The game I’d seen at Shu’s house yesterday flashed through my mind.

FROM E.

From E.

I set the cigar box back on the bedside table.

“I thought maybe I could find out something if I played it.”

I idly toyed with the game chip in my pocket.

“It looks... like a letter someone left behind, judging from the title....”

“Fine then. Finish it and hand it over.” Yun agreed more easily than I expected.

I widened my eyes at his readiness; he shot me a look that said why were you surprised.

“I’m not interested in beating games. I want to dissect the structure. Done sulking?”

“...Yes, well... Couldn’t you at least think of your poor junior as being legitimately sad for a reason? I wasn’t asking for consolation, really.”

“You’re not cute at your age.”

Yun cut off my whining in a voice that felt like a cold wind.

He even landed a direct blow in a tone devoid of warmth.

“Wasn’t it your choice?”

His eyes were sharp as a pale scalpel.

Those were eyes born without warmth. Over a life that could not be called short, I had met several people with eyes like that. Colton was one of them. Kyle immediately sensed his coldness and despised Colton.

So he would never have imagined I’d take Colton’s hand.

Men like that kept an eerie calm even on battlefields—people you would not want to be close to.

I smiled bitterly at the man who resembled a piece of machinery.

“That’s true.”

“Then accept it. No one will praise you or change anything because you drown in guilt now.”

Yun said in a dry voice, pocketing the cigar.

“What do you want to do? Expiation?”

“If I could atone, I would carve away my soul to do it. But it’s not the kind of sin that can be absolved. Will what I did be forgiven?”

“Then there’s no reason to waste time like this.”

The man with composed features stood with his hands still in his pockets, tilted slightly. A posture I saw whenever he went out for morning exercise.

The mentor who could not empathize applied cold logic.

“If I were you, now that this has happened I would cut away every trace of the past that remains. You’ve already chosen to stand with humans and drawn your sword, right? If you’ve taken up the blade, then cut down everything you resolved to cut.”

Good heavens.

I remembered hearing almost the same words from Colton.

I could not help laughing.

“You sound exactly like Falcon!”

“Crossing the line.” Yun replied, expressionless.

“Still, I’m better than that bastard.”

“Ah, that’s true. At least you don’t kill people.”

Colton had gone above and beyond, brutally killing anyone who annoyed him....

...Why isn’t there an answer?

Silence filled the cabin.

Perfect stillness.

The smile on my face faded.

Wait a minute.

“Did you kill people too?” I blurted.

“What are you talking about now?” Yun smiled lazily.

The slow smile was chilling. I opened my mouth and stared at my mentor.

“If you had killed innocent humans, would Yehyeon have just left me alone?”

I was not stupid enough to miss the implication between the lines.

I stared blankly at him, then let out what I truly felt.

“I miss Yehyeon.”

“Don’t talk nonsense.”

“If it weren’t for people like Yehyeon or Ami, the past me surely would have sided with humans because of them. ★ 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ★ If I’d only met seniors like you and Falcon, I would have advocated exterminating humans.”

“Back to being a foolish rookie. Let’s go exercise.”

That madman seemed unaware of the force of his words as he pointed a thumb lazily toward the door behind him.

Yun shifted his body leisurely and added, “After you run laps, stop by home and take some pumpkins. They’re a nuisance. If you don’t take them all and eat them, I’ll hand you over to Richard.”

“If you’d been appointed my mentor in the past, I wouldn’t have become a traitor,” I said gloomily as I followed my mentor.

“I would have led the charge to exterminate humans,” I added.

So the time of rolling under Yun’s guidance had returned.

In the end I was stuck with pumpkin duty.

***

Walker and Shu did not come to see me at once.

I did get a message from Shu. I stared at my phone indecisively for a long time because I did not know how to reply to the senior with the flashy hair color.

Shu had sent the message:

[Shu Diamond: Were you in politics?]

Party leader... What even is that...

I had vague memories of meeting all kinds of politicians back then, and of eating with them often, but fundamentally I had no taste for politics.

I could not remember exactly how I had become a Titan leader. Maybe I was suppressing the memory unconsciously for fear that remembering would only plunge me into guilt.

After considering the screen, I replied:

[They say so, but I don’t remember wellㅠ]

Thankfully Shu did not pry further.

He simply asked me to play the game and tell him how it was afterward. Of course I planned to.

Even if I pulled something tied to the past out of it, I would be careful with my words when reporting. Giving a neutral review of the game would be easy enough: its story, music, runtime, difficulty, and so on.

But I was still afraid to start the game.

I was scared of it.

Two weeks after getting the game, while heading to meet Hesh and Tom after training, Yun approached me.

He spoke in a face that was frighteningly expressionless.

“You said you thought you might find out something by playing it. You said you would atone, even if it meant shaving away your soul. So how long do you intend to procrastinate playing it?”

“...Why are you like this to me?” I asked, retreating a step as Yun’s strange tone unnerved me.

I was genuinely scared.

“Are you drunk?”

“If you don’t turn on the game tomorrow I’ll open you up.”

His voice returned to its usual tone abruptly.

The cold retort came, then he took something from his pocket. I recognized at once what he had taken out—what I had seen in the Harlem district with Shu and Walker. 𝗳𝚛𝗲𝕖𝕨𝕖𝗯𝚗𝚘𝕧𝕖𝗹.𝗰𝗼𝕞

A transparent syringe filled with green liquid.

Green Dream.

“You use this when you cut into an enhanced body,” he said, shaking the syringe in front of me.

“I’ve already booked the operating table.”