Blood Queen Reborn
Chapter 89: Trying and Struggling
Inside the temporary military dormitories, a heavy, suffocating silence hung completely undisturbed in the air, shared by a pair of students who found themselves sitting in two entirely separate rooms. Specifically, Peter was currently sitting inside one of the small, sparse dorm bedrooms. It was a dark, claustrophobic place built without a single window to let in natural light, and it leaned a little on the smaller end of standard housing accommodations. However, despite its cramped dimensions, this was the very first time in his entire life that he had ever gotten a bedroom completely to himself. He sat quietly on the edge of his bed, reading his level 2 earth ability book, desperately attempting to master the material and get all of the fundamental core concepts down.
Grabbing a handful of soft soil from a nearby plastic container that he kept specifically for training, Peter tried his absolute best to shape the earth into a functional weapon. Deep within his mind, he was intently visualizing the raw material turning into a perfectly formed bow in the exact same manner he would usually control shifting mud. Then he opened his eyes to see the results of his effort. There was absolutely nothing. The formless, raw soil remained completely loose and entirely unaltered in his open palm. Gritting his teeth in intense frustration, Peter threw the handful of dirt directly at the solid wall, creating a loud, echoing thunking sound upon impact.
’Why!? Why can’t I shape this into a stupid bow!’ Peter yelled furiously within the secret confines of his own mind. He choked back a heavy, bitter sob that threatened to tear through his throat, and then he quickly covered his eyes with both of his hands. ’I’m worse than useless... Everyone always has to step up and pick up my slack... Even Fex is noticeably stronger than me.’
He genuinely did not want to be useless, as he had always absolutely hated feeling that weak way, and yet Fex, despite officially being a level 1, had successfully beaten someone who possessed a higher ability level than him. Peter himself had to get completely bailed out by Layla when he was suddenly attacked by Jerry—someone without any form of actual combat power or martial training of all things. It had been a small, desperate hope of his that he could finally learn how to properly reach the second level of the earth ability to make a bow. It was supposed to be something, anything, to allow him to be helpful to the rest of the group, but he unfortunately could not even manage to achieve that single simple task.
Suddenly, the bedroom door creaked open on its metal hinges, and Peter stopped his quiet sobs for a brief moment to see Fex standing directly in the doorway.
"Hey, I heard you throw something," Fex commented, his voice carrying a little annoyance. He had been suddenly woken up from his afternoon nap by the loud noise.
"Why am I so useless?!" Peter blurted out in a sudden surge of despair before quickly covering his mouth with his hand. Realising his own outburst.
"Huh?" Fex blinked his eyes in complete confusion, and blinked again.
Peter shook his hands frantically back and forth, trying to distract Fex from the vulnerable statement he had just accidentally said out loud. "Forget it! Just— leave."
Fex let out a low groan at the sudden dramatic outburst from the boy. He hadn’t particularly liked Peter ever since the whole red portal incident took place. It was entirely because of him that both his and Erin’s lives were placed at a serious risk of death. Of course, that didn’t actually get to the heart of the underlying issue as to why he didn’t like Peter.
"Yeah, you really are," Fex replied with blunt, unfiltered honesty.
"Huh?" Now it was Peter’s turn to blink, completely stunned by the harsh reply.
"Actually, maybe I shouldn’t put it exactly like that," Fex tried to word his thoughts a bit better to soften the impact, "You’re more like... not really able to do anything particularly useful at the current moment."
Peter sniffled softly, and his head drooped incredibly low toward his chest, "Yeah, you’re right. I could never be useful, I’m just a—" he let out a heavy sob, "—waste of air, why would anyone likeee meeee?"
As Peter continued to speak, his words completely devolved into uncontrollable sobs. Watching him cry like this, Fex felt a little awkward and uncomfortable with the raw display of emotion.
"Um..."
Walking up to him, Fex lifted Peter’s head by putting a finger on his chin, and staring deep into his eyes. Then, his own eyes began to glow a vibrant, hypnotic red color. "Forget the past 2 minutes, just continue working on what you were doing before."
Peter’s eyes glossed over into a blank stare, and he had completely ignored the fact that Fex was leaving the room and closing the door behind him. He continued exactly as he was before the interruption, trying his absolute best to reach the second level of the earth ability. Fex was now walking back out into the shared living room area, and he plopped his tired body back down onto the soft cushions of the couch.
As Fex was about to continue his nap, he found that his overall mood had soured. Fex realized that he had just been with the exact person who had made him confront his deeply buried shame. It was the profound, deeply hidden shame of never having legitimately and honestly completed his own testing process.
’Dang, I’m not that much better than Peter in a way,’ Fex thought silently to himself, ’I had to pay other people to pick up my slack, but at least I didn’t try to push my friend into a death planet.’
Digging his hands deep down between the couch cushions, Fex took out his personal pack of chewing gum, and put a single piece in his mouth. He originally got it because he wanted to see what the big deal with gum was all about, but despite it not being blood flavored, he found that he liked to chew on it as it distracted him from his thoughts. Plus, it helped him blend in more as a human.
Quinn and Layla were still spending time inside the traveler’s hall, but this time, they were present not as regular customers, but rather as hopeful sellers. Using his ability, Quinn made a crude earth stand where he was selling some of his new sculptures to whoever was interested. At first they tried selling them for 50 credits, then 25, then 10, all to no avail.
"Come on guys! It’s only just 5 credits!" Layla called out to the passing crowd, with a tired voice. "Man, we’re selling these for peanuts," She sighed.
"What are peanuts?" Quinn wondered, looking over with curiosity. "A bit of a strange name."
"I think they were some sort of snack you could grow or something. They went extinct a while ago," Layla replied, "They’d probably sell more than this..."
On their stone stand were Quinn’s earth sculptures, all of various shapes, colors and sizes. However, due to the fact that he really wasn’t an artist, they looked nothing like what he intended them to be.
"Be honest with me, no one is buying these because they look like crap," Quinn glanced over to Layla, deadpan.
"No, they aren’t bad! You’re an amazing artist, like uh, you made this really cool looking lamp." Layla quickly said, then picked up a sculpture that looked like an abstract lamp. 𝒻𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘸ℯ𝒷𝘯𝘰𝑣ℯ𝑙.𝘤𝑜𝘮
Quinn grimaced, "That’s meant to be a person."
Layla cringed, "Oh."
Quinn slumped over the stand, hand on his chin, trying to figure out a solution to their current predicament.
In the corner of his vision, he saw that Erin had opened a system window, apparently doing something with her ability, which had made him wonder about his own. He had recalled a time when he put a small indent in the beast spheres back in the assembly room. At the time, he was only a level 1.1, but what if...?
"Layla, man the stand," Quinn stated before leaving the stand.
"Wha— you can’t just run off—!" Layla sputtered out, watching Quinn run off, "... Who am I kidding? It doesn’t make a difference if he’s here or not, no one is buying anything."
Heading right outside the shelter, just near the entrance, Quinn dug his hands into the ground. This was a skill he had developed while trying to find beasts underground, but what Quinn was trying to detect weren’t beasts, but little anomalies. Things that he could control, but felt different than the sand.
That was when he felt it. Little chunks of something far more solid than the grainy sand. Bringing these anomalies to the surface, Quinn quickly saw little shiny jagged bits dig themselves out of the sand. He knew what this was, and it was scrap metal.