Discussing The Correct Posture To Enjoy Dog Food-Chapter 34 - Lemon Flavored Film Emperor Gong (13): Tomorrow I will act shy, lalala~~

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Chapter 34 - Lemon Flavored Film Emperor Gong (13): Tomorrow I will act shy, lalala~~


Translator: KunLin


Editors: Amaris, Grump



======《Seeking Survival on Wilderness Island》Holo Broadcast of the scene · Day 10 ↓↓======


After being baptized these past few days, Su Chu and the others had already become accustomed to the rhythm of life on the island. Their eyes were more spirited and were full of light, but they had also become skinnier and darker.


That was, with the exception of Gou Liang and He ChongFeng.


In Gou Liang’s case, it was because the identity reset prop remained in effect for the entirety of this world. No matter what, his appearance wouldn’t be affected much and would remain just as white and tender as before; when he smiled his beauty could slaughter across the four seas. He ChongFeng on the other hand was slightly tanned, but he had somehow managed to put on two pounds—Gou Liang secretly snuck many benefits to him, but he was able to put on this bit of weight partly due to the amount of exercise he did during this period of time.


On the tenth day, they prepared to set off for the other side of the island.


During the five days they spent in the centre of the island, they experienced many new sights. They climbed trees to pick exotic fruits, fermented fruit wine together with Gou Liang, harvested and ate honey from honeycombs… things that they thought they would never experience in this entire lifetime, they did over the past few days.


This time, they still travelled on foot but didn’t see the grand and intimidating river from last time. Their entire journey was rather unperturbed, they were even in the mood to appreciate the scenery along the way.


That was until they were crossing a stream with water that reached to He ChongFeng’s knees.


Below the water was rocks with aquatic plants growing all over. Zhang QiaoYi, with a tall and sturdy stature second only to He ChongFeng’s, slipped and fell into the river, creating a big splash—


【Ding! The target is in mortal danger, may mission undertaker No.00401 take immediate action!! 】


Gou Liang who was walking at the front turned his head around from the commotion. The mainframe had suddenly issued a warning. Shocked, his eyes widened as he reflexively cried out: “ChongFeng, dodge!!”


He pulled out a blade from his sleeve and threw it over with force—


He ChongFeng only felt a painful sensation in his ankle. A silvery-white light had flashed by and a snake was pinned beside his feet. As he looked over, the black and white snake was already in its death throes. It soon floated to the surface of the water before being slowly washed away by the stream…His head was spinning dizzily, he straightaway perceived that the venom of this snake was very potent.


Su Chu who was walking in the middle let out a cry while the others were scared into a stupor from the sudden turn of events. Zhang QiaoYi who was closer had a pale face, he held He ChongFeng and said: “I’m fine, hurry let’s go!”


“Don’t touch him!!”


Gou Liang madly rushed over. In his urgency, he accidentally tumbled.


“Little Fool…”


When He ChongFeng saw this, he wanted to rush over and stop Gou Liang’s fall but his body slackened. As his vision blurred, and his head couldn’t help but sway under the sun’s glare.


Gou Liang threw himself at He ChongFeng’s feet, wordlessly, he reached into the water and felt for He ChongFeng’s ankle. After confirming the location of the wound, he lifted He ChongFeng’s left leg and used the sharp blade to cut away the leg of his pants before lowering his head.


“Stop…Little Fool, don’t…”


He ChongFeng swayed, Zhang QiaoYi flusteredly supported his body.


Gou Liang had spat out a mouthful of black blood and came above water to rinse his mouth before going back down to suck on He ChongFeng’s wound again.


Ming Xing, the group, as well as the safety personnel from the production crew rushed forward, their faces devoid of blood.


“Ah Feng, are you alright?!”


“Medics, hurry and set up the equipment!!”


After Gou Liang sucked out all the blackened blood, he set down his hiking bag and found his medicine box.


【Gou Liang: Little Wanton, exchange for a detoxification prop, now! 】


【System: Yes, Master!】


After receiving the system’s response, Gou Liang’s nerves finally calmed down a little. He was really afraid that it would be like last time, when he was caught off guard and helpless.


Gou Liang took off the syringe cap and gave He ChongFeng an intravenous injection while having the system use the detoxification prop.


After giving the injection, Gou Liang stood up and clasped He ChongFeng’s face, saying: “Can you see clearly, how many fingers is this?”


“Little Fool, you, my blood!”


He ChongFeng’s eyes were opened wide and full of alarm and worry.


It took Gou Liang a minute to understand what He ChongFeng was saying. He made an ‘oh’ sound and casually gave himself a saline injection—he wasn’t poisoned, but doing this could put He ChongFeng at ease. As expected, the latter quieted down. Gou Liang gave his hiking backpack to Zhang QiaoYi and ordered in a stern tone: “We’re leaving here, pronto.”


He bent over and carried He ChongFeng on his back while dodging the crew medics who wanted to take over the handle.


======《Seeking Survival on Wilderness Island》Holo broadcast, Day 10 · My Feng was bitten by a snake ↓↓======


“Ah!”


“No!”


“My Feng!!”


“What to do, My Feng was bitten by a snake, was it venomous or not!”


“My Feng! Wuwu, may the Heavenly Father bestow his blessing, don’t let anything happen, don’t let anything happen!”


Not to mention the BEEs who had already cried until their voices broke, even fans of the other celebrities felt their hearts tighten with worry.


“That wasn’t a water snake, it was a coral reef snake, it’s highly venomous!”


“My Feng has to pass this safely&#k2026;”


“If anything happens to My Feng, I’ll go to WE this instant with a bomb so we can perish together!”


“MaiMai’s actions are so professional!”


“My Feng is fine, he will definitely be fine!”


“Are the crew’s medics purely for display?!”


“Quickly, go home, ba! I don’t want My Feng to stay in such a dangerous place…”


The sounds of crying were even more intense than when My Feng had announced the end of his bachelordom. The broadcast room was once again submerged in tears. Thankfully, MaiMai had treated the wound quickly. After he had carried My Feng to shore, the medics swarmed them. They used a machine to perform a blood test on My Feng and waited for the result.


MaiMai waved away the doctor who had come to treat My Feng’s injury and used his own medicine that he had brought to bandage his wound: “You’re not needed here, go take a look at Zhang-Ge’s injury, ba.”


Zhang-Leader rubbed his buttock and finally became aware of the pain from his fall. However, he was in no mood to agonize over it.


He said with self-reproach: “It’s all because I was careless. If I hadn’t startled the snake, it wouldn’t have suddenly attacked and bit Ah Feng. If something happens, I ought to spend my entire life on this island, no need to go back.”


Color slowly started to return to My Feng’s face. They didn’t know what medicine MaiMai had used, but My Feng’s vital signs had already returned to normal, it was just that his speech was still somewhat inarticulate.


“Little Fool, examen.”


After MaiMai had finished treating his wound, he shook his head and said: “I’m fine, no need to worry. ChongFeng, rest assured, I won’t let anything happen to you.”


He crouched on the ground and took My Feng’s pulse. After a long while, he furrowed his brows and gave him a few acupuncture needles. He said with heartache: “Bled so much blood, who knows how long you’ll have to recuperate for…”


In this short period of time, My Feng had completely recovered his mobility. He lifted MaiMai up in one go and hollered: “Doctors! I said to examine him, didn’t you hear?!”


The crew medics and the fans were startled by him. MaiMai hugged him and abruptly began to cry: “That darn snake! I will smite its nine generations, watch me obliterate this lousy island!”


My Feng pursed his lips in silence, his brows tightly knitted.


【Ding, the target’s favorability value has been updated. Current favorability value:+85! 】


A few laughs could finally be heard in the broadcast room↓


“I was so nervous I bit my tongue just now.”


“That cry startled my boyfriend into wetting his pants…”


“WE, sit obediently and accept my blade, ba!!”


“MaiMai knows medical skills! And he’s a traditional doctor, seems so amazing!”


“Before, MaiMai had pinned the snake down with a single throw of his knife, it seemed even cooler than a martial arts drama!”


“Thank you MaiMai for saving My Feng. My gratitude is like that towards my parents!”


“Fangirling, don’t mind me guys, let me cry for a while.”


“When I saw how well My Feng treated him before, I drank a lot of vinegar and almost unfollowed MaiMai. Now…Sorry, MaiMai, I’m your fan for life!”


“MaiMai likes My Feng so much ah, if it were me in that situation I would’ve cried and fainted. Fortunately, MaiMai is powerful!”


“MaiMai didn’t hesitate at all, I don’t know if I would be able to do the same if I were him…”


“MaiMai is domineering even when crying!”


“Mama is asking why I’m kneeling while watching the broadcast…”


“I fainted just now, right now I’m in an ambulance. Guys, quickly tell me, is My Feng alright?!!”


“Sister, be strong, My Feng is already alright. All thanks to My Barley!”


“Then I can rest assured and enter the delivery ward!”


“Upstair… ̄0 ̄。”


……


======《Seeking Survival On Wilderness Island》Holo Broadcast, Day 10 · A frightful morning ↓↓======


“Ah, ah, ah!!!!!”


Goddess’s scream lifted the curtain on an eventful day.


Not far away, Little Teddy and the others were all frightened into a miserable state. They rushed out of their tents to help Goddess, who had fallen to the floor and was scrambling backward continuously, stand up. “What’s wrong, what’s wrong?”


Goddess answered in a shaky tone: “S-so many snakes. Let’s leave… I want to go home…”


Teddy and the other subsequently looked over— “Ah!!!”


“What’s going on?!”


“My Goddess’s face is so pale, just what exactly is happening?! Director, come out and give an explanation!”


The fans’ hearts tightened. After My Feng was bitten by a snake yesterday, they no longer wanted to hear anything related to the word ‘snake’. They looked at the broadcast screen that was covered in mosaic and a trigger warning popped up for the first time ever: The number of snakes surpassed the hundreds. Due to the overly grisly sight, may fans with enochlophobiaand ophidiophobia take the initiative to block your screens.


“Shhh, don’t make a sound, don’t wake them up.” Cheng-Laoshi covered Goddess’s mouth to stop her shrill screams. He helped her slowly retreat with him. Zhang-Leader’s legs had already gone soft and he leaned against Little Teddy for support.


Little Teddy mustered his courage and said: “I-I think they’re all dead.”


At this moment, MaiMai walked out with a yawn. “It’s all a bunch of dead snakes, I caught them as supplements to nourish Male God’s body.”


Following behind him, My Feng’s expression changed. He furrowed his brows and said: “Didn’t you promise not to do such dangerous things?”


MaiMai shrugged his shoulders and said: “It’s not dangerous, ah, how can these things be my opponents? Humph, I want it so they will be scared when they see us in the future. See if they still dare to come!”


My Feng: “…”


Suddenly, My Feng hesitantly spoke up again: “A moment ago, the thing you had me eat…?”


MaiMai waved his hands: “Fresh snake gall, it’s a holy item for detoxifying poison, oh. Give up ba, it’s all in your stomach now, it’s too late even if you try to vomit it out.”


My Feng: “…”


Fresh snake gall… the fans expressed: Don’t want to imagine it. My Feng, pat pat QvQ.


The rims of Little Teddy’s eyes reddened. “You, why didn’t you inform us beforehand TДT !”


MaiMai replied: “Apologies, normally none of you come into the kitchen in the morning.”


The goddess drank some water to calm herself before saying tearfully: “Sorry, after what MaiMai and Ah Feng experienced yesterday…I thought I would make breakfast today…”


She didn’t expect she would be greeted with such a frightening scene.


“False alarm QAQ。”


“What false alarm, I was really scared to death, okay!”


“The crew has put mosaics but once I think about hundreds of snakes gathered together, even if they’re dead snakes… my entire body is filled with goosebumps right now.”


“Goddess also had kind intentions, who would’ve thought…”


“MaiMai, you really went to destroy that snake’s nine generations!”


“Haha, I can only say, well done!!”


“When did he do this?”


“MaiMai probably closed the broadcast camera and went out yesterday, that’s why I thought during the latter half of the night, there was only one person in My Feng’s tent.”


“My Feng is helpless against him. MaiMai, you can just directly ascend to heaven.”


“Hundreds of snakes… MaiMai, what are you planning to do…(>д<)”


MaiMai, as if he could hear what My Feng was thinking: “We will have to drink snake soup for a period of time. Today, we’ll have dragon phoenix soup, simmer-fried snake meat, steamed snake meat, I’ll use chicken fat and wild vegetable oil to slowly stew the snake meat over slow fire…”


“Little Fool,” My Feng said, “I don’t want to eat.”


Little Teddy couldn’t hold it in and rushed out to vomit. The complexions of the others weren’t great either.


MaiMai paid them no mind, he tiptoed and rubbed My Feng’s head. In a warm voice he said: “Be good, listen to Doctor’s words.”


My Feng: “…Ok.”


“Haha, My Feng suffered greatly to answer!”


“Seeing My Feng safe and sound, I can finally swallow my leaping heart.”


“My Xing is vomiting so pitifully T ^ T。”


“Doctor Mai~~”


“Goddess and Leader’s legs have gone soft, it’s all thanks to Cheng-Laoshi supporting them that they haven’t toppled over yet…23333.”


“Pardon me, but I’m so disgusted I can’t even swallow my breakfast.”


“To be honest, I’m curious as to what hundreds of snakes piled together would look like XD。”


“On the first day, I was frightened badly when I saw but a single snake, but now I’m also curious as to what it looks like. It must be satisfying! See if they still dare to bite My Feng!!”


“Done checking—Mai Tao, graduated with a master’s degree from X country’s Imperial Academy of Medicine, is a traditional medicine specialist, possesses an expert-level surgical license and has just turned twenty one years old… MaiMai is so amazing!”


“For real?!”


“Goodness, how can someone be so talented!!”


“Twenty one years old, the passersby who are still attending year two in medical school…”


“A lifetime with no regret as My Feng’s fan, a lifetime with no regret loving my Barley!”


“I’m forty years old and still testing for an intermediate license _(:зゝ∠)_.”


“My Feng has such a cute fan by his side, Mama can finally rest assured ^__^.”


……


======《Seeking Survival on Wilderness Island》Holo Broadcast of the scene · Day 14↓↓======


Although what remained of He ChongFeng’s injury was merely two bite marks, Gou Liang still insisted on making him rest. Afraid that He ChongFeng’s wound would get infected by going out, Gou Liang persisted in making him stay in the safe zone, not letting him go out while he himself remained unprecedentedly energetic. Everyday, he would go out to forage when the sun had barely risen.


It was as if this wild island was his backyard. Everytime he went out, he would get a fruitful harvest in under an hour.


Ming Xing and the others stared at him with hungry eyes. Although Gou Liang had a sharp tongue, he would always give them a portion of his yield every time—it may not be the best portion, but it was already delicious to the point of them hating that they couldn’t swallow their own tongues.


Su Chu said ruefully: “I thought that if I were to stay here for half a month, all my picky eating habits would be cured. But now it seems like… in the future, without MaiMai’s cooking, how will I be able to live?!”


Zhang QiaoYi said: “I feel like I joined a gourmet show, haha!”


Cheng Bei: “It’s all thanks to MaiMai! When we return to the city, why don’t you come to my house for a meal? Although my wife’s cooking can’t be compared to yours, the Northern dishes she makes are very authentic.”


Gou Liang didn’t refuse.


Ming Xing added: “MaiMai, when you return you won’t forget about me, ya? When you send food to my parent in the future, don’t forget about me—this big living and breathing person.”


Gou Liang grinned and said: “Don’t worry, I’ll definitely forget.”


Ming Xing: “...Cousin, you really are my cousin!”


Gou Liang turned his head: “My eyes hurt looking.”


Everyone laughed.


They would soon bid each other farewell but they felt reluctant to. All of them took their cameras and went to show the beautiful scenery to the audience.


The afternoon of the next day, the crew’s plane landed on the island.


The director said: “How was it? Fellow male gods and Goddess, did you enjoy this past fortnight?”


Su Chu: “It was scary and stimulating, but I had fun. Thank you, everyone, for your care towards me over the past days. I hope that in ten years we can still gather together here to roast some fish and drink some snake soup, hahaha.”


Zhang QiaoYi: “The one we should thank the most is MaiMai. If it weren’t for him, who knows what kind of days we would have lived; we would definitely have starved. I also have to apologize to Ah Feng, I endangered you last time. Thankfully everything ended well.”


Cheng Bei: “My wife even said that if I go hungry on the island and lose a few pounds, I would look better when wearing a suit on our wedding. But during the last few days, I actually gained weight. Haha, I hope I won’t be made to kneel on a washboard when I return home!”


Ming Xing: “MaiMai, hand over your address and I’ll let you go!”


He ChongFeng: “It was fun.”


Gou Liang: “I’m saying no to freeloaders, thank you.”


No matter how unwilling the fans were, they still followed the mains as they left the isolated island where they had lived for fifteen days, a place full of their tears and laughter. The plane flew over the ocean, breaking through the layers of clouds–


《WE’s Hundredth Anniversary · Seeking Survival on Wilderness Island》END。


On the plane.


When the holo cameras were shut down, He ChongFeng pulled Gou Liang into his embrace and said in a soft voice: “Don’t be reckless anymore, you hear me?”


Gou Liang patted his back to appease him, “En, I’ll remember.”


He ChongFeng said: “Little Fool, we… let’s get married!”


Gou Liang’s eyes widened. He then smiled, revealing a pair of sweet dimples. “Okay. You can’t regret it. When we get off the plane, we’ll go get married!”


“I won’t regret it.”


He ChongFeng kissed his lips.


Gou Liang pushed him down on the seat and heavily kissed him: “Male God, Male God, I like you so much!”


He ChongFeng broke out into a smile. All traces of his usual aloofness were completely gone, his warm and gentle expression could melt the person looking at it.


Gou Liang could smell the faint scent of lemon, he swallowed and couldn’t control himself—if he didn’t eat now, then when would he?!! He had been stifled for so many days!


“ChongFeng…”


He ChongFeng indulged him. Only when the other proactively teased him with urgency did he clasp the other’s cheeks and seize control. He used his hands to block off Gou Liang’s face and their two intertwined lips as he kissed him deeply.


【Ding! The mission progress rate has increased. Current completion rate: 10.5%!!】


They two kissed, loathing to part.


Everyone on the plane: 🗿



Get ready for some actions next chapter