Aselia’s POV

His words tore through all my defenses and I couldn’t help but let my eyes be fixated on his face which was as serene as a winter landscape I desired to paint.

’Pure’ that’s what he was to me, that’s what I felt even when I had seen him bloodied, for his heart was indeed pure and I knew he would understand the answer I would give him.

"I don’t want that Xiran, not like this... I don’t know how to tell you, but this is not the proper way, at least that’s what I feel. That bond is sacred to me," a confused look passed on his face at my words as he let go of my hands and removed his knee by straightening his leg. Instead, he captured my face in his smooth hands and gently asked:

"How?"

I wasn’t even sure if he wanted to take our relationship to that level. His infatuation with me could end at any moment. And although elves aged relatively slower in comparison to humans, I wasn’t an immortal like him. How long before he would toss me aside and find someone else?

"I am not sure how long you want this relationship Xiran," I answered apprehensively.

"Didn’t you bond with me forever? I am not letting you go unless you decide, otherwise. That will never happen from my side, I can reassure you this much. So throw away your insecurities."

His hand caressed my cheeks as if reassuring me that he wasn’t letting me go. His eyes roamed my face trying to catch any glimpses or clues of what I was feeling.

"I don’t understand much about that bond we share but the mere thought of it ever breaking hurts me physically as well as emotionally. It tears me apart," a pained expression replaced the serene one on his face at my answer and his thumb brushed the sensitive spot under my eyes as he questioned:

"Are you still in pain? Does it still hurt?"

"No, no. It stopped the day I accepted my feelings for you, I haven’t experienced its effects lately. But I want to learn more about how it works through proper channels. I don’t want us to rush just because of this bond or simply because we have to do it," I added with a sigh. I wasn’t sure if he even believed in marriage or even wanted one in the first place and no way was I going to ask him about it.

"This is a huge relief for me to know that it’s not hurting you anymore. I can’t see you suffer because of it, and yes we don’t have to do it until you are comfortable, I wasn’t trying to push you earlier, just teasing you. You know I like doing that."

His words didn’t reflect the emotions he held in his eyes and I could see my words had disappointed him, though being a gentleman he would never push me. Still, I hated the fact that I wasn’t giving him everything he desired.

"My answer has disappointed you, hasn’t it? Be truthful Xiran. Don’t lie," I placed my hand above his heart so I could feel what his heart had to say on this matter.

"If s£x was my ultimate goal, we wouldn’t be here. I would be fucking a random girl and you would be killing more vamps. When I see you, my entire being wants to own you, not for s£x, no absolutely not. It’s more like I want to share little parts of my daily life with you. It’s to protect you so no harm might come to you again, remember I will go to any length to do that," his obsession to protect scared the hell out of me. I had a feeling one day he would do something in the name of protection, and both of us will end up regretting it.

He continued to speak as I intently listened: "It’s to feel you near me and hear you bicker incessantly," a small smile crept up on his sumptuous lips as he continued to move them:

"It’s to touch you, every part of you, and observe your reactions to my words and actions. Sometimes I just want to grab you and fly away from this world to somewhere peaceful and quiet. Where no one would find us and yes I do want to make love to you, I won’t lie about that. The thought has crossed my mind numerous times, I want to fill you with myself so we can become one but only when you are ready. So, to answer your question my Leia, no I am not disappointed with your words for I was expecting them."

My heart felt so weak in that instant, the overpowering feelings and emotions he had kindled inside me with merely his words made me shudder. How could he be satisfied with someone like me? When he could have any girl in the world. I understood my reasons to want him but not really his to want me.

Seeing I was at a loss for words he smiled slightly and breathed out: "Love needs to be tested, right? Having s£x is not love, it’s just a physical attraction, a drive to fulfill our carnal desires. But love transcends that, it has to be pure and you are so pure and you don’t even know it. Sometimes I feel I am tainting you with my filthy being, but I can’t help myself."

His words displeased me and a scowl crept up my face: "You are not filthy and I forbid you from ever using that word for yourself, you are mine and I find you perfect the way you are, I give a damn what anyone thinks."

His smile broadened at my words as he gently kissed my forehead and whispered: "Yes, ma’am."

"And I don’t know if our love will stand the test of time but I don’t think my heart can ever love or choose someone else. So thank you for being patient with me," I moved my hand from his chest toward his back and he pulled him closer, our bodies collided and so did our lips.

I wasn’t sure how long he kissed me or ravaged my body but it certainly lasted hours before we drifted to sleep in each other’s arms.