Chapter 30: Chapter 30: "Then You Don’t Want Me Anymore?

I have to admit, when Li Yan heard Aunt Yu Yi’s words, his mind flashed with ecstasy.

’His mother is actually still alive!’

Something that had once seemed utterly impossible was suddenly happening right before his eyes. It was as if a beautiful dream had become tangible.

No wonder he was so drawn to that lady from the Ming Family the first time he saw her.

No wonder he’d felt such a strong urge to be near her.

No wonder... no wonder he had received a bowl of longevity noodles today, especially since he had never told anyone it was his birthday.

’So that’s why. If that lady from the Ming Family is my mother, then everything makes sense!’

Standing outside, Li Yan felt an indescribable wave of excitement. But just as that excitement began to blaze in his heart, Ming Lingyi’s familiar voice reached his ears.

The tiny flame that had just sparked in his heart was instantly doused, as if by a basin of bone-chillingly icy water, and extinguished completely.

’It seems my mother doesn’t want to acknowledge me.’

No matter how much Li Yan acted like a little adult on a daily basis, he was still only a five-year-old child.

He couldn’t hide his feelings, not in the slightest.

With a BANG, he shoved the wooden door open. Li Yan’s beautiful, large eyes were already brimming with tears.

He stared stubbornly at Ming Lingyi, who stood not far away. "Are you my mother?"

Li Yan’s sudden appearance caught Ming Lingyi completely off guard as well.

It was just as she’d told Yu Yi moments ago; she wasn’t ready to reunite with her Little Bun yet. So, when Li Yan hurled the question at her, Ming Lingyi’s mind went blank.

But more than worrying about whether Li Yan could accept her, her heart went out to the little boy in the doorway. Seeing his stubborn eyes, so clearly fighting back his feelings of hurt, Ming Lingyi sighed to herself. ’He’s what matters most right now.’

"I am." 𝙧𝙚𝙚𝔀𝒆𝓫𝓷𝙤𝓿𝒆𝙡.𝒄𝙤𝓶

Her plans were in complete disarray, but after admitting her identity, Ming Lingyi felt an unexpected wave of relief.

Regardless, even if Li Yan was just a child, he had a right to know the truth.

Li Yan asked, "Then... does that mean you don’t want me anymore?"

As he asked, he dug his nails into his palms so hard they nearly broke the skin.

He was scared, but his gaze was still stubborn. He refused to look away, staring fixedly at Ming Lingyi.

Ming Lingyi’s heart ached. She shook her head. "I never have."

When those words reached Li Yan’s ears, his nose stung, and he burst into tears.

All the pent-up grievances in his heart seemed to vanish at those three words, like darkness scattered by the light of dawn, leaving not a trace of gloom behind.

The Little Bun’s forgiveness came that easily.

Ming Lingyi walked forward and swept the Little Bun from the doorway into her arms.

Without a word from Ming Lingyi, Yu Yi went to the door, closed it, and stood guard outside.

Ming Lingyi took out a fresh handkerchief and wiped the face of the Little Bun in her arms.

’She was certainly going through a lot of handkerchiefs today,’ she thought.

’First one, then the other. Why are there always so many tears?’

Just as she had that thought, she felt a small, warm hand on her face.

"Mother, you don’t cry either," the Little Bun’s soft voice, still thick with tears, came from her embrace.

Only then did Ming Lingyi realize that at some point, she had started crying too.

The mother and son’s emotions were running high, but Ming Lingyi still explained her current identity and circumstances to him.

She didn’t dismiss him just because he was young.

"I just... I thought this all sounded too unbelievable, and I didn’t know how to explain it to you. I wasn’t ready," Ming Lingyi admitted honestly. "I’m sorry for not being by our Little Huachao’s side for these five years."

Li Yan didn’t say anything, just buried his head in Ming Lingyi’s embrace.

He remained silent, but his small hands clutched tightly to the fabric of Ming Lingyi’s clothes at her waist, refusing to let go.

Little Huachao.

No one ever called him that on a normal day, but he knew he had such a pet name.

Aunt Yanxia had accidentally let it slip once.

’He knew in his heart that this was the name his mother had given him.’

He actually loved it. He had always secretly loved it.

"It’s not your fault, Mother..." Li Yan said in a muffled voice. "Besides, I’ve read storybooks about strange things. All that matters is that you’re back..."

He didn’t care about anything else.

The important thing was that the person before him was his mother, the person he felt an instinctive closeness to whenever he was near.

Ming Lingyi stroked the Little Bun’s head.

"Mother, are you coming back with me today?" Li Yan looked up from Ming Lingyi’s embrace, his big eyes glistening with tears as he asked.

Ming Lingyi was at a loss for words.

Meeting Li Yan’s expectant gaze, she shook her head.

When she saw Li Yan’s pitiful expression, like that of a dejected puppy, Ming Lingyi had to suppress the ache in her heart. She was just about to tell him it was alright. After all, he had the Crown Prince Mansion outside the imperial grounds, and from the looks of things today, it wasn’t as hard for him to leave the palace as she had imagined. They would have plenty of other chances to meet.

But before Ming Lingyi could get a word out, the Little Bun in her arms asked in a low voice, "Is it because Mother doesn’t like Father? Is that why you won’t come back to the palace with me?"

Ming Lingyi was stunned, momentarily forgetting how to respond.

Children speak without reservation, but the question was surprisingly sharp.

Ming Lingyi paused for a moment. "It’s a rather complicated matter, not something that can be decided based on one person’s preferences..."

"So that means Mother doesn’t like Father," Li Yan said with certainty.

’He still remembered his mother saying that Father’s new decree was completely unreasonable.’

Ming Lingyi was speechless.

"I get it. I won’t tell Father. This will be a secret between you and me!" Li Yan said, looking Ming Lingyi seriously in the eyes.

Ming Lingyi had been racking her brain for a way to explain to the Little Bun in her arms that things between adults were complicated, and that she had no desire to see Li Yun right now. Who would have thought that before she could say a thing, her Little Bun would stop asking questions and unconditionally take her side.

At that, Ming Lingyi broke into a smile.

She looked down at him. "Alright, then this will be a secret between Mommy and Huachao."

"High five!"

A childish and immature voice reached Ming Lingyi’s ears.

It was getting late, and though Li Yan was reluctant, it was time for him to return to the palace with Yu Yi.

Ming Lingyi watched the two of them walk away into the distance.

On the way back, Li Yan was practically giddy with joy.

Even if he knew his mother wasn’t quite ready to formally acknowledge him, he didn’t care. The important thing was that he had a mother now, and he would always have one in the future. That was more important than anything.

At this thought, Li Yan suddenly looked up at the person beside him and asked, "Aunt Yu Yi, how did you find Mommy’s shop?"

Before they parted, his mother had specifically instructed him that from now on, he could only call her "Mommy," not "Mother." Li Yan had memorized every word Ming Lingyi said.

Yu Yi thought for a moment, then explained how Yanxia had recognized the familiar embroidery on his pouch and told him about the plum blossom cakes from the day before.

"...That was all Her Ladyship’s... all the Young Miss’s handiwork. I’ve been by the Young Miss’s side since we were children, so..."

Before Yu Yi could finish, Li Yan interrupted, his voice filled with disappointment, "But... in the Eastern Palace, there isn’t a single thing that Mommy made for me with her own hands..."

The thought made him feel utterly dejected.

Yu Yi looked as if she wanted to say something, but held her tongue.