Chapter 16: Chapter 15: Conscience Merchant

The task assigned by the Lord of Gopher City was complete. The Gopher, guided by the Undead, arrived at the wall. The bones on its surface shifted, once again revealing a passage. He scrambled through it without a moment’s hesitation, desperate to leave this place he found so utterly terrifying. 𝘧𝘳𝘦ℯ𝓌𝘦𝒷𝘯𝑜𝑣𝘦𝓁.𝒸𝘰𝓂

Watching the Gopher’s frantic escape, Li Ziyu shook his head with a smile. He then opened the system’s chat interface, typed in the ID for Conscience Merchant, and sent a friend request.

The real reason the other party had sent someone was for that last piece of Beast Hide, no bigger than the palm of his hand. Everything else had just been a lead-up.

With the system in place, trading wasn’t difficult. This wasn’t like trading with the Natives. A transaction through the system wasn’t just delivered to your door—it went straight into your inventory.

The Lord of Gopher City was a cautious one. ’He probably worried I’d read too much into it, so he deliberately sent a Gopher.’ On one hand, he wanted to gauge the Undead City Lord’s attitude. If I killed the Messenger on sight, then there was nothing more to be said—he would just flee. On the other hand, it was also a signal of goodwill.

The moment he sent the request, the other party accepted.

"Welcome to the Gopher’s humble shop! For us to meet in this vast, endless crowd, it must be fate. I hope we can prioritize harmony, advance hand-in-hand, and create a brilliant future together."

’Whoa, he’s taking this seriously. He even has a canned welcome message.’ Li Ziyu chuckled and sent a message.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: Lord of Gopher City?

Conscience Merchant: That’s me, dear.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: How did you find me?

Conscience Merchant: Dear, it was fate that led me to you, and fate that has brought us together.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: ...Look, friend. If you keep beating around the bush, this is going to get a lot less pleasant.

Conscience Merchant: Now, now, dear. Don’t be like that. I’m merely a Merchant, and information is just another one of my wares.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: Name your price.

Conscience Merchant: 9,998 units of meat.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: ...

’This isn’t just robbery, this is blowing up the entire vault!’

’Who gave you the guts to demand 9,998 units of meat for a single piece of information? Even A Large Iron Hammer wouldn’t dare charge that much for his Stone!’

Conscience Merchant?

’He has the nerve to demand 9,998 units of meat for a single tip, and he calls himself a man of conscience?’

Li Ziyu’s face twitched. In his mind, he silently branded the name "Conscience Merchant" with the label "Scam Artist."

To put it bluntly, the Lord of Gopher City simply didn’t want to tell him. He quoted an outrageous price to make Li Ziyu back off.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: Forget it. Can’t afford it. So, what resources do you have?

Conscience Merchant: Dear, I have a wide variety of wares. Whatever you need, just say the word.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: How about a moon.

Conscience Merchant: ...Don’t have one.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: Fine, then how about a sun?

Conscience Merchant: ...Don’t have that either.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: You don’t have anything. How can you call yourself a Merchant and come to me looking to trade?

Conscience Merchant: Very well said. Please don’t say it again.

Conscience Merchant: So, dear, what is it you actually need? If I have it, we can talk price.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: Your subordinate will tell you what I need when he gets back to you. Once you get your hands on it, we can talk.

Conscience Merchant: Of course, dear.

Li Ziyu closed the window with a smirk. ’Nice try, you punk. Teasing me with some information for 9,998 units of meat? Does he not know who’s holding the cards here?’

’I’m the buyer here!’

The conversation with Conscience Merchant had actually put Li Ziyu in a fairly good mood.

He’d been in the Otherworld for a few days now, and his nerves had been constantly on edge. He was terrified of this unknown world and the predators lurking in the Dark Jungle. He didn’t dare trust anyone and had barely even spoken in the chat channels, terrified of inadvertently revealing information about himself.

Humans are social creatures who need interaction, but Li Ziyu hadn’t dared to chat with anyone else. The loneliness was deeply unsettling. Communicating with Conscience Merchant felt like talking to an online customer service rep, and he found himself unconsciously relaxing. His nerves weren’t so frayed anymore.

Letting out a long sigh of relief, Li Ziyu lay back down and quickly drifted off to sleep.

...

He slept soundly. By the time he woke up, night had fallen. The Undead had already prepared water for him to wash up and something to eat.

Li Ziyu deactivated Hibernation Mode, causing the Mobile Fortress to rise from the earth. At the same time, he gave the order for autonomous movement.

This "autonomous movement" simply meant continuing in their previous direction. Any Wild Beasts they encountered along the way would become their prey. As for Fierce Beasts, they would be avoided—those, they couldn’t beat.

Although their strength had increased significantly after the battle with the Lizardman Robbers, Li Ziyu was still eager to leave the Wasteland. Acquiring resources here was too difficult, and it wasn’t conducive to his growth.

He opened the system while eating his dinner. The chat window was flashing, indicating a new message.

To date, Li Ziyu had only added two friends, and both were Merchants. The first was "A Large Iron Hammer," with whom he had previously traded for Stone. The other was the Lord of Gopher City, "Conscience Merchant." A Large Iron Hammer wasn’t the type to message him out of the blue, so it was almost certainly from Conscience Merchant.

He opened it. Sure enough, it was.

Conscience Merchant: Dear, I’ve received your request. I’ll have an answer for you shortly.

Conscience Merchant: I managed to get the Skeletons! How many do you need?

’He got Skeletons this quickly?’

Li Ziyu paused mid-bite. Then, remembering the man was a Merchant, he relaxed. It was true that he could acquire some Skeletons by hunting every night with his Mobile Fortress and Undead, but his collection speed was far too slow compared to a dedicated trader.

Since he was in business, Conscience Merchant obviously wouldn’t limit his dealings to just Transmigrators. The Natives were potential customers he would want to court as well.

Skeletons were a crucial resource for Li Ziyu. But for the native tribes of the Wasteland, besides being used as decorations, their greatest purpose was likely fertilizing fields. They were essentially worthless. It should be incredibly easy for Conscience Merchant to acquire Skeletons from the Natives.

He just didn’t know how many Skeletons the merchant had acquired. Li Ziyu could restrain himself when it came to other resources, but not Skeletons. They were just too important; they were indispensable for both construction and increasing the number of his Undead.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: How many Skeletons do you have?

Conscience Merchant: Good heavens, dear, you finally replied! I’ve waited so long my flower’s wilted.

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: If you’ve got a leaky gut, you’d better be careful. Medicine isn’t easy to find around here.

After that message, Conscience Merchant went silent for a long time, trying to figure out what Li Ziyu meant.

’Wilted flower... leaky gut...’

’The two don’t seem related... Hmm, wait. Flower... leaky gut... Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License?’

’Damn, that’s foul. So gross!’

Conscience Merchant: You’re the one with the filthy mind! Anyway, I don’t have many on hand right now, just 100. How many do you want?

Don’t Want to Get a Driver’s License: I was just concerned for your health. What’s the exchange rate?

Conscience Merchant: Thanks, I’m thoroughly grossed out. Good thing I haven’t eaten yet. You want to trade for food?

Li Ziyu stroked his chin. Conscience Merchant had quoted him a price of 9,998 units of meat before, and now he was proposing to trade for food. This led him to a suspicion. ’Could it be that food is scarce here in the Wasteland? Is food the real hard currency?’

If food really was the hard currency, that would be for the best. He didn’t have many other resources, but food was something he had a decent amount of.