Three years felt both short and long.

Anyone who’s served in the military would understand what I mean. How could twenty-one months feel so endless? I never imagined that a mere twenty-one months would drag on longer than six years as a trainee.

–The military... no, thanks.

Before parting at the terminal, Seok-hwan hyung’s words finally made sense. A lot happened over those three years. Working at Grandma’s restaurant until I became an adult, I enlisted in the military as soon as I turned twenty. I didn’t want to waste food expenses when I couldn’t earn money.

I also thought about my future then. Having had my dream of becoming an idol crushed, I wandered aimlessly for a while before finally revising my life goal. Composer. Perhaps inheriting musical talent from my parents, who were instrumentalists, I had some musical ability of my own, so I chose to become a composer. If I couldn’t be an idol, why not create music for idols? I entertained that thought. Starting as a composer and later moving into producing sounded like a respectable career path. That’s why I prepared for the CSAT. I believed that entering a good music college was essential to becoming a composer.

Of course, studying for the CSAT in the military was far from easy. There were many obstacles. Having neglected my studies for six years pursuing idols, the GED and CSAT preparation posed a tremendous challenge. If not for mastering English and Chinese during my trainee days, I’d probably still be preparing for the exam now. With a fresh start in mind, I dove into two years of study. After countless workbooks and mock tests, I was now down to only the CSAT.

Winter 2013. Present day. It had been three years since leaving the company, and having been discharged only recently, 21-year-old Sun Woo-joo was now a test-taker awaiting the CSAT. In the cold air that made my breath visible, I understood why every year the exam day suddenly turned bitterly cold. Ugh. It was freezing.

Scrolling through the internet on the new smartphone I’d acquired upon discharge, I walked along the street. It was still before dawn. The streetlights were still aglow.

[Which stars are taking the CSAT today?]

Tapping an entertainment article on the portal, I recognized familiar faces: Han Tae-hyun of TNT, Yoo-bin Jeon of La Vie en Rose, and so on. Faces I’d seen passing through TJ Entertainment filled the screen—so many familiar faces. The one that caught my eye was Han Tae-hyun of TNT.

TNT. After I’d been cut and a new member added, TNT debuted immediately. The result was a massive success—nothing less than a blockbuster. They swept every rookie award that year, earning the title of greatest rookie idols ever. Even I didn’t expect them to do that well. Well, it had nothing to do with me anyway.

I exhaled slowly and looked up at the hill in front of me. Perhaps because it had snowed yesterday, the slope leading up to the exam site was coated in ice. How was I supposed to climb this? Momentarily frozen in panic, I turned my head at an odd sound.

Clank— The sound of a manhole cover striking a wheel. An elderly man was struggling to push a handcart up the hill. Perhaps because of his age, he reminded me of my Grandma in Gunsan. He was laboring up the slope, swaying each time the wind blew, and my heart ached. Should I help him? Since it was still early, I had plenty of time before the exam. Checking the digital watch I’d worn since my military days, I nodded. If I were to do a good deed, might as well go all the way. Who knew—perhaps someone high above would see me and think, “What a kind soul,” and grant me a blessing.

With that thought, I forced a bright smile. “Sir.” “...” “Sir.” “...Are you calling me?” he replied in a weak voice. “You must be tired. I have plenty of energy left—let me see you safely to the top of the hill.” “You’d help?” “Yes.” “You look too slender to have any strength.” “Don’t worry. I may look like this, but I was only recently discharged, huup...!” The moment I gripped the cart’s handles, I realized something was wrong. “...Hmm?” “What’s the matter?” “It’s nothing, haha!” I laughed outwardly, but a cold sweat poured inside my padding. Was this weight for real? Soon I discovered two shocking facts. First, the cart wasn’t just carrying cardboard boxes; it was stuffed with old radios and other scrap electronics. Second, the elderly man’s arms were alive with muscle, calves bulging beneath his trousers. I felt foolish for meddling in the affairs of someone who could handle it alone.

“Are you all right, student?” “This is incredibly heavy. It looked light at first glance.” The man chuckled heartily. “Oh my, student. Is anything easy in this world?” “True enough.” “This isn’t something just anyone can do. It takes know-how.” “How many years have you been doing this, sir?” I panted out my question. “My whole life.” “Gasp... That’s amazing.” Pride blossomed on the scrap dealer’s face. “With this, I sent my son to college... Oh dear, are you already spent? A young fellow like you, what use is it if you’re worn out?” When the cart finally reached the top, I clutched my knees. Wow, this is insane. Steam rose from inside my padding, sweat dripping from my sideburns. Lesson for the day: never underestimate a handcart again.

“Thank you, student. You meant well, even if the help was lacking. You have a gentle heart and a handsome face. Absolutely lovely.” “Y-yes, thank you for your effort.” “So, student, where are you headed now?” “I’m going to the school up ahead to take the exam.” “Ah, the CSAT?” “Yes.” “Oh, a test-taker helping an old man—what effort!” The old man clasped my hand tightly, and I felt warm comfort. “Good deeds bring blessings.” “Thank you.” I didn’t feel I’d contributed much, but it felt rewarding. Is this why people do volunteer work? After exchanging warm wishes with the elderly man, I bowed and continued on my way.

Soon I reached the exam site entrance. But as I walked, rubbing my stiff shoulders, another strange sound drew my gaze.

Vroooom! A car was speeding down from a distance. What on earth? Is he out of his mind? A white sedan was racing along a side road toward the school. The driver’s movements suggested he might be drunk. And he was headed straight for... “Sir!” The old man had stopped his cart and was making a phone call in the car’s path. I shouted urgently, “Grandfather!” but he didn’t react, likely hard of hearing as he spoke on the phone. Meanwhile, the car bore down on the cart, and my heart pounded anxiously.

No time to think! In a moment of suspended time, I sprinted with all my might toward the old man’s cart. The car closed the distance in an instant. “Watch—out—!” As the license plate loomed before me, I shoved the old man aside. Ka-whang! The car demolished the cart and crashed through a hair salon’s glass window. “Are you okay—?” The old man fell to the ground but seemed unharmed. The problem was me. “Ugh—!” My foot, having sprinted at full speed, slipped. What the—? Stepping on the ice was my undoing. In an instant, my center of gravity shifted backward and I felt momentarily weightless, like a Viking ride plunging. Then, wham—! I collided with something and tumbled down the slope. When my spinning finally stopped, I saw a barbecue restaurant sign featuring a smiling steer. Ah. My head hurts. My vision blurred. “Three servings of sirloin, forty-five thousand won....” That was my last memory.

When I came to, I was in a hospital. The time was ten o’clock. Hearing that I’d missed the exam after the entry time had long passed felt like the world was ending. If there’s a god, I’d ask why he harbors such resentment toward me. It’s always the same. Just when life seems to go well, I get screwed over like this. My parents died on my seventh birthday. Just as I started practicing for a piano competition, Grandma was diagnosed with cancer. I was cut from my debut lineup on the verge of debut. And now, on CSAT day, I saved a life only to miss the test.

What do I tell Grandma? Imagining her at the temple praying hard for my CSAT success left me at a loss. But perhaps my years of misfortune had toughened my spirit, because surprisingly my mental state recovered quickly. In fact, this was one of the better misfortunes. Other times I suffered pointless, rewardless tragedies; this time, at least I saved a life. Though the fact that I “only” saved a life was the problem.

“Cough!” On the bed next to me in the emergency ward lay the old man, who curled up painfully with each cough. His ribs were broken from my shove. Feeling guilty, I spoke up. “I’m sorry for causing you so much pain.” “Oh, don’t say that,” his pleasant-looking daughter-in-law, who had come as his guardian, waved her hand to dismiss my apology. Her husband nodded beside her. “If it hadn’t been for Sun Woo-joo, my father wouldn’t even be in this bed.” “Thank you for saying that.” They said they were the old man’s son and daughter-in-law. I’d thought the son looked like a professor, and sure enough, his card revealed he was a university hospital professor. The old man’s name was Choi Ik-hyeon, and his son was Choi Yong-jae. “Choi... Ik-hyeon?” “Yes, that’s my father’s name. Is there a problem?” “Oh, nothing.” I’d just recalled the term for the righteous, isolationist movement from my CSAT study materials. The son looked at me with concern. “How are you feeling?” “The doctor says I’m miraculously fine. Just need a good rest today.” “Why don’t you stay at the hospital? We haven’t properly thanked you, and we’d like to cover your medical expenses....” “That’s not necessary. I didn’t help for a reward.” I waved them off when they insisted I at least share a meal. I didn’t feel up to eating cheerfully with them. As I bid farewell to the couple, the old man on the bed grabbed my wrist. “Student....” His voice was weak and wavering, perhaps from the broken ribs. “I’m sorry.” “Pardon?” “I’ve committed a grave sin. You needed to take that important exam, but you got tangled up with a troublesome old man... I did wrong. Truly.” “Please don’t say that.” Holding the tearful old man’s hand firmly, I spoke as if promising myself. “You can take the exam again, but you can’t bring back a life.” “Still....” “Really, it’s okay.” When I forced a reassuring smile, the old man wiped his eyes, and the son and daughter-in-law looked unsure. “See you later, then.” I said my goodbyes to their invitation to share a meal, and as soon as they were out of sight, I sighed. Another year of study—seriously? Feeling overwhelmed by my unintentional status as a repeat test-taker, I glanced at the TV in the hospital lobby.

An action movie was playing on the film channel. I’d watched it in the military. The protagonist was the world’s greatest spy who lost his memory and went on the run, if I recall correctly. The scene was early in the film: a policeman aimed a gun at the protagonist. Having lost his memory, the protagonist raised his hands in surrender. As the policeman approached and grabbed his shoulder, the protagonist—his body instinctively trained in martial arts—reflexively flipped the officer and threw him to the ground. Hmm? Watching that familiar scene gave me a strange feeling. Or rather, a sensation. Not one of the five senses—sight, hearing, smell, taste, touch—but something different. As I tried to grasp that strange sensation, my thought was interrupted by my phone vibrating.

“Hello?” –Is this Sun Woo-joo? A deep voice. “Yes, who is this?” ✪ Nоvеlіgһt ✪ (Official version) –Hello. I’m Investigator Jang Gyeong-il of the Traffic Investigation Division at Eunpyeong Police Station. “Oh, yes.” –I’m calling regarding the traffic accident investigation from this morning and need to take a statement from the victim. May I know where you are right now? When I named the hospital, the voice brightened. –Great. I happen to be in the hospital lobby. “Really? I’m in the lobby too.” –You’re the tall young man on the call, right? “Where are you now?” –Right here— I felt someone place a hand on my left shoulder along with the voice. Then. My body began to move on its own. ...Huh? It felt as if someone else was controlling me. Grabbing the hand on my shoulder, I spun lightning-fast and in an instant threw that person to the ground. Thud—! A chilling silence fell over the hospital lobby.