Chapter 349: Chapter 231: She’s Already a Widow, I Can’t Let Her Live Like One Anymore

"Lady Daisy was betrayed by both her husband and her best friend. She needs to vent, she needs comfort. This is the best way to get to her."

Liu Ling looked at Zhou Chen, his tone profound as he announced to him—and to everyone watching:

"—She’s already a widow. I can’t... let her continue to live as one!"

After this sanctimonious declaration, Liu Ling strode purposefully toward the house across the street. His retreating figure was so resolute that anyone who didn’t know better would have thought he was marching off to war.

’What the hell, man? This is a global live broadcast! Can they even show this to a global audience? Really? If he keeps this up, the official stream is going to get banned...’ Zhou Chen was dumbfounded, shocked by Liu Ling’s utter lack of integrity.

’No... does this guy even have any integrity or principles to begin with?’

Watching Liu Ling enter the villa and shut the door, Zhou Chen scratched his head. Feeling a little awkward, he quickly left to go find the homeless man, Old Jack.

He walked a few blocks to the alley where Old Jack lived, only to find he wasn’t there.

’Out looking for food?’

Zhou Chen remembered a nearby park. Old Jack might have gone there to open Treasure Chests. He decided to head to the park and try his luck.

At the same time, he multitasked, pulling up the map of Akita Town in his Spiritual World to examine the location markers.

’Four markers left. Two of them are at City Hall and the church. The church... Isn’t that Priest just a con man? Or could he actually know something?’

Zhou Chen mulled it over. It seemed the Priest was a key figure as well.

But before heading to the church, he needed to talk to Old Jack first.

Arriving at the park, Zhou Chen scanned his surroundings and easily spotted Old Jack in the distance, rummaging through a trash can for food. He walked over quickly. Before he could even speak, Old Jack heard him approaching, looked up, and in the next second, fled in terror, abandoning the food he had just found.

’It’s impossible to communicate with him... Old Jack is paranoid. He thinks some evil force is using a Brain Control Device to brainwash people into puppets. He must think I’m one of those brainwashed puppets, here to get him...’

Suddenly, an idea struck Zhou Chen. He glanced around furtively, and after making sure no one was watching, he quickly fashioned a Tinfoil Hat and placed it on his head.

’Now I’m also one of the "Wise Men," sober while the rest of the world is drunk. Old Jack should be willing to talk to me now, right?’

With the Tinfoil Hat on his head, he found Old Jack, who had resumed rummaging through a trash can.

This time, Old Jack didn’t run. Instead, a look of delight spread across his face. He rushed over, grabbed Zhou Chen’s hand, and stammered excitedly, "You... you... you’ve figured it out too? The Illuminati! The Illuminati are secretly brainwashing the townspeople! Only Tinfoil Hats can help us resist the brainwaves from the Brain Control Device!"

Zhou Chen adopted a grave expression and played along. "Comrade, I’ve discovered the truth. I’m just like you now, a member of the resistance—the ’Tin Punks.’ We have to stop the Illuminati’s plot and save the townspeople from this crisis!

Why don’t you start by telling me who the members of the Illuminati are?"

"Of course, it’s the damn Big-chested Lizardman, Number 42 Concrete-Mixed Spaghetti, the Blue Duct-Tape Organ, Wild Trigonometric Functions, the Purple Yogurt Shooter, Great Tits and Kittens, and the most evil and dangerous of all—the Sunshine Rainbow Little Pony!"

Old Jack cursed, flustered and furious. "FUCK! Those bastards are using the Brain Control Device to slowly take over humanity, turning people into their slaves! They want to rule the entire World, and we have to stop their plot!"

"You’re right. The Sunshine Rainbow Little Pony is super evil and super dangerous," Zhou Chen nodded with exceptional gravity, his voice solemn. "But they’re too powerful. We have to take this one step at a time. First, we need to gather information and find their weakness.

Didn’t you see a monster before? It was probably a member of the Illuminati."

"A monster? Yes, I saw one," Old Jack said haltingly. "It was tall, and big, and dark. It had wings like a dragon, the eyes of a fly, the fur of a wolf, and the horns of a goat..."

’Hold on, what the hell is he describing?’

Zhou Chen, still deep in character, was suddenly at a loss. Joey and the others hadn’t mentioned any of that.

"Why don’t you... try to remember again? Joey and the others said the monster was humanoid."

"Humanoid? Oh, right, the monster was humanoid," Old Jack said, as if suddenly remembering. "It was tall, and big, and dark, like a basketball player who weighs several hundred kilograms... What does it eat to get that big?"

’This guy is completely unreliable... If I hadn’t found the monster’s tracks myself, I’d think he was just spouting nonsense.’ Zhou Chen sighed in resignation. Old Jack’s mental illness seemed severe. He had probably seen the monster, but unfortunately, he couldn’t describe it accurately, saying one thing one moment and something else the next.

"Right, why did you follow us into the forest today?" Zhou Chen asked.

"...Was I in the forest?"

Old Jack looked confused. He frowned in thought for a moment before it dawned on him. "I remember now! I was in the forest. Those kids... The kids are in danger!"

Old Jack’s voice suddenly shot up, startling Zhou Chen. He quickly tried to calm the anxious man. "Don’t worry, they’re safe right now. They’re all at home, completely safe...

Why do you say they’re in danger?"

"After the Illuminati are done brainwashing the adults, they’ll... they’ll go after the kids! They’ve been targeted! They’re in danger... great danger..." Old Jack was so agitated he looked like he was about to bolt. "One kid has already disappeared. I have to protect them! They’re my friends..."

"Listen, Old Jack, they are safe right now." Zhou Chen placed his hands on Old Jack’s shoulders, doing his best to keep him calm. He spoke gravely, "If you want to protect them, you need to remember the monster’s appearance, its movements, the places it’s appeared. Only by finding that monster can we foil the Illuminati’s plot."

"..."

Old Jack fell silent, seemingly lost in thought.

Just as Zhou Chen was hoping for a useful clue, Old Jack exclaimed:

"Hot dog!"

"What?" Zhou Chen asked, bewildered.

"I want a hot dog!" Old Jack said, looking at him. "I’m hungry."

Zhou Chen slapped his forehead and sighed, looking up at the sky.

’Tough luck you’re hungry. I don’t have any money...’

***

In the end, Zhou Chen found a busker with a guitar near the shopping center. He borrowed the guitar, played two songs, and earned a few US Dollars in tips from passersby. After giving the guitarist a small cut, he used the rest of the money to buy a hot dog for Old Jack.

Two weirdos in Tinfoil Hats sat leaning against a wall on the side of the street. One of them was wolfing down a hot dog while the other looked like he had lost the will to live. Their appearance drew stares and whispers from passersby, some of whom even tossed them money.

"Old Jack, my man," Zhou Chen said wistfully, "as a member of the ’Tin Punks,’ you’ve gotta pull your weight a little, huh? The Tin Punks are already outmatched. If you keep this up, we’ll never be able to take down the Illuminati."

"I want another one," Old Jack said, licking the ketchup from his fingers, still not satisfied. He hadn’t heard a word Zhou Chen said.

"...If you want another one, you have to work for it. Think hard about the monster you saw that night. What did it look like?" Zhou Chen pressed.

"Let me think..."

Old Jack fell into deep thought, his expression showing he was racking his brain. Suddenly, he pointed to a passerby in the distance and whispered, "It looked like him."

Zhou Chen followed his finger. It was a Black man.

’His eye twitched. ’Well, at least I can confirm the monster is literally black... Ugh, in a way, that’s pretty close to what Joey described at the start—a pitch-black humanoid monster. The size doesn’t match, but maybe that’s what it looks like...’

"The monster comes out in the early morning. I saw it right here before," Old Jack added, pointing at the shopping center.

Zhou Chen’s eyes narrowed. "Are you sure?"

Old Jack wavered. "Probably..."

Zhou Chen rubbed his aching temples. ’Forget it,’ he thought. ’I’ll just wait until the early morning and see.’