Chapter 378: Chapter 212: Su Liyan: "Bro, Its Tongue Is So Thick, It’s So Scratchy!

With her long hair unbound, Su Liyan had a pure and delicate beauty that would stir a rare protective impulse in anyone who saw her.

Hearing what Lu Yuan said, Su Liyan looked down at the little white furball clambering over the threshold of the room.

"I’m not some plaything! My name is Xiaotian!" Xiaotian stood on its hind paws, folded its front paws across its chest, and tilted its chin up as far as it would go.

Xiaotian struck a pose of smug pride, as if showing off its scrawny little body to the entire world.

The sight filled Su Liyan with delight.

Su Liyan rose from her chair, took a few steps forward, and crouched down. Stroking the white fur on Xiaotian’s head, she looked up at Lu Yuan and said, "He can talk! This little guy is so adorable."

Su Liyan’s heart melted at the sight; she was already treating Xiaotian like a pet.

Lu Yuan peeked through the collar of his wife’s nightgown. All he could see were two round, white rabbits swaying within. The gown was a little too big for her.

Lu Yuan sat down to the side, took a sip of tea, and said slowly, "I found him on the mountain last night. Xiaotian has quite a stubborn streak."

As his head was being petted, Xiaotian smacked Su Liyan’s hand away with a front paw. He shot her a look and said, "You can’t just pat a guy’s head whenever you want! It’ll stunt my growth!"

Hearing this, Su Liyan paid him no mind. ’What’s so untouchable about his head?’

’I can play with my husband’s hair however I want, and he’s never said a single word of protest. So I can’t even have a little fun with Xiaotian’s head?’

Su Liyan ruffled his fur vigorously a few more times and even gave his head a little shake, saying happily, "So adorable!"

Xiaotian, growing irritated from the manhandling, glared at Su Liyan.

Just as he was about to erupt, Xiaotian’s eyes suddenly lit up, and he threw himself at Su Liyan’s calf, hugging it tightly.

Having just woken up, Su Liyan hadn’t yet had a chance to change. She was still in her nightgown, her fair calves left completely bare.

Xiaotian began licking Su Liyan’s calf, rubbing his face against her skin from time to time while mumbling, "Whoa, whoa, whoa! What a delicious spicy stick! It smells so good! So good!"

SLURP, SLURP, SLURP...

This sudden turn of events left both Lu Yuan and Su Liyan completely flabbergasted. Xiaotian was acting like a total little pervert.

Su Liyan hastily stood up and backed away, kicking her leg to try and shake off Xiaotian’s pestering.

Xiaotian, lost in the moment, clung to Su Liyan’s leg. He couldn’t get enough of her soft, fair calf.

Su Liyan cried out in alarm, "My love, this little thing is getting drool all over my leg! Its tongue is so rough, it’s practically scraping me! Get him off!"

Lu Yuan quickly grabbed Xiaotian by the scruff of his neck, forcibly prying him off Su Liyan’s calf.

Dangling in the air, Xiaotian was still struggling with all his might.

"Let me go! Let me go!"

Still holding Xiaotian by the scruff, Lu Yuan used his other hand to give the creature’s head two sharp thwacks. The force was just right—enough to stun him without causing any brain damage.

Lu Yuan’s voice was tinged with anger. "Hey, you little lech. What do you think you were doing to my wife just now?"

Knocked back to his senses, Xiaotian looked at Lu Yuan and said, "Spicy stick! Oh, wait—your wife is a Half-Demon! She’s a Snake Woman, didn’t you know?"

You couldn’t really blame Xiaotian. Snakes had always been one of Brother Pingtou’s favorite delicacies; his love for them was innate.

Lu Yuan replied with a nonchalant look, "She’s my wife. You think I wouldn’t know? I’ve known since the day we first met."

"Heh heh heh, the boss is really the boss! Getting it on with a Snake Woman," Xiaotian said with a toothy grin.

Su Liyan was not pleased to hear that. She took Xiaotian from Lu Yuan’s grasp and found a stool to sit on.

"Heh heh heh... what are you doing?" Xiaotian asked, struggling.

Su Liyan placed Xiaotian on her lap, pinned him with her elbow, and rolled up her sleeves. "What am I doing?" she said menacingly. "You dare call me a Snake Woman in front of my husband? I’m about to teach you a world of pain."

This talking animal certainly had a way of getting on one’s nerves.

Su Liyan pursed her lips and began to spank Xiaotian’s rump.

"Heh heh—Owowow! It hurts! Boss! Save me!" Xiaotian wailed.

"You still dare to laugh? I’m not stopping until you submit," Su Liyan said as she continued to spank him.

Hearing Xiaotian’s cries for help, Lu Yuan simply pulled over a chair, sat down, and watched the scene with unconcealed glee.

After a while, Lu Yuan said, "Honey, you keep at it. Don’t forget to have breakfast in a bit. I already ate out. I need to refine that Elixir for the Crown Prince of Yan."

"You got it, dear," Su Liyan said, rolling her wrists.

Xiaotian lay motionless on Su Liyan’s lap, not daring to move an inch.

’Su Liyan was so much stronger than him. To think he’d ended up getting thrashed by a Snake Woman... if word of this got out, it would be a disgrace to all of Brother Pingtou-kind.’

What Xiaotian didn’t know was that Su Liyan was already going easy on him.

If Su Liyan were truly angry, even a dog passing by would catch a slap or two.

Xiaotian lay there, whimpering softly as if he were crying.

Su Liyan picked him up again. "Had enough?" she asked.

"Pretty lady! I give up!" Xiaotian said, his head hanging low.

For a Brother Pingtou, who bowed to no one, to be won over by Lu Yuan’s roasted meat was one thing. But to be beaten into complete submission by Su Liyan was a true wake-up call.

"There now, that’s much better," Su Liyan said, gently stroking Xiaotian’s head.

Su Liyan placed Xiaotian on the floor, handed him a cotton cloth, and said, "Go on. Wipe your drool off my leg."

With a miserable look on his face, Xiaotian held the cloth between his two front paws and began wiping the drool from Su Liyan’s calf. He was surely filled with immense regret. ’Why, oh why did I have to provoke such a giant spicy stick?!’

Lu Yuan went to his study, took out the Seven-Star Wind Pill Furnace, and arranged the necessary medicinal herbs in a box before him.

This was Lu Yuan’s first time performing Alchemy. Before he began, he once again leafed through the *Alchemy* Secret Manual, carefully re-reading the refining method for the Human Level Middle Grade Elixir required to treat Gu Gaochi.

Now confident in his plan, Lu Yuan levitated the Seven-Star Wind Pill Furnace in mid-air and began by preheating the Pill Furnace with a low flame.

Next, he added the source of life—rootless water.

It hadn’t rained recently, so Lu Yuan had to ask the abbot of Guyang Temple for some of this rootless water.

Then, he tossed the medicinal herbs—Du Zhong, Night-Intertwining Vine, Zhi Zi, Star Spirit Grass, and the others—into the Seven-Star Wind Pill Furnace in succession.

The Flame Lu Yuan conjured roasted the Seven-Star Wind Pill Furnace. Simultaneously, he channeled his Inner Strength, fusing the various herbs together from outside the Pill Furnace while trying to evaporate as much of the rootless water as possible.

Lu Yuan couldn’t help but marvel. ’Without the support of powerful Inner Strength, how could an ordinary person ever hope to fuse all these herbs together?’

The few Alchemy Masters in the Divine Ling Empire didn’t possess a Secret Manual like the *Alchemy* in Lu Yuan’s hands; they all had to rely on repeated trial and error to grope their way through the elixir-refining process.

These Alchemy Masters didn’t need to fuse the herbs into a solid elixir during the process. They simply had to boil the water away, add more, boil it away again, and after repeating this five or six times, they would render the herbs down into a medicinal paste.

Then, they would mix some cooked flour into the paste, knead it in their hands for a bit, and roll it into pills. This method, at least, could be considered relatively conscientious.

As for the elixir’s effects, however, these Alchemy Masters could offer no guarantees.

Therefore, to enhance the potency of their elixirs, unscrupulous Alchemy Masters would often mix things like red lead, autumn stone, human milk, or cinnabar into the paste before rolling it into pills. An elixir like that was guaranteed to be a cure that killed the patient.

Fortunately, this was the Divine Ling Empire, not the modern world Lu Yuan had transmigrated from.

In the era Lu Yuan came from, there were no more Alchemy Masters, only food-development engineers. Phthalates, nitrites, carrageenan, trans fatty acids... their main selling point was simply being "tasty and cheap"!

After forty-two minutes, Lu Yuan finally boiled all the moisture out of the Seven-Star Wind Pill Furnace. A single elixir was left floating inside.

Lu Yuan thought, ’It’s a success!’

But just as Lu Yuan relaxed, he heard a loud—DUANG!—from inside the Pill Furnace. The elixir had cracked in half.

"Well, a failure," Lu Yuan muttered to himself. He had no choice but to start over.

After a long ninety-nine minutes...

Lu Yuan finally succeeded in refining the Human Level Middle Grade Elixir.