Fortunately, it didn’t seem like the other party had noticed his disgraceful display. Figuring it might be better to just sleep, Haejun buried his head in the pillow. He was about to tell Lee Kangjoo he was too sleepy, that he needed to close his eyes for a bit.

Something brushed against his slightly parted lips. Haejun, who had been keeping his eyes shut, flicked them open.

“Uh....”

Their lips touched, then separated. It was hard to believe what had just happened was real. Haejun blinked and stared at Lee Kangjoo right in front of him. That faint smile on his face looked like an illusion.

“Wasn’t that what you were asking for?”

“M-me?”

“You were looking at me like that.”

Had he been that obvious? Haejun covered his eyes with both hands. The part of his face left exposed beneath them was bright red.

He was embarrassed. Like a secret he’d buried deep inside had been exposed.

Their lips collided again. Kangjoo gently coaxed open Haejun’s tightly bitten lower lip and slipped inside. He caught both of Haejun’s hands and pinned them down against the pillow, then went deeper. A thick tongue filled his mouth, drifting lazily between his sensitive palate and his own tongue.

Haejun’s lashes trembled faintly. He’d done far worse countless times, yet whenever their tongues tangled, a jolt ran all the way to his fingertips. His mind drifted somewhere between dream and reality, his toes stretching out before curling back in. His balls, emptied of even a drop of semen, twitched, and his cock hovered between hard and soft.

Even his first kiss—hell, even his first time—hadn’t been this intense. His heart pounded like it was about to leap out of his mouth, and his brain seemed to have run off somewhere. He couldn’t think at all. Absolute blankness.

Every nerve in his body gathered at the tip of his tongue. He wanted to be preserved like this forever. It felt as if fresh whipped cream had been placed on his tongue, and his body like a scoop of ice cream dropped onto summer asphalt, melting and boiling under the heat.

Lee Kangjoo’s bare body pressed heavily down on him. His half-swollen cock brushed over Haejun’s thigh like a paintbrush. Drawing in a sharp breath, Haejun bent his knees and spread his legs, their cocks pressing together and slowly grinding.

Heat bloomed like flowers wherever they overlapped. In the hands gripping him, in the skin brushing against his, in their lips and inside them.

When their lips parted, it felt worse than being thrown from a warm room into a snowstorm outside. This time, Haejun leaned in first. He didn’t want to be even a fraction apart from Lee Kangjoo. He didn’t dare wrap his arms around that body, so at least the lips he was allowed—he wanted to take them to his heart’s content.

* * *

When he came back to his senses, he was touching his lips. Haejun blankly rubbed them like someone possessed until Yohan slammed the table, jolting him awake.

“What the hell is wrong with you.”

“What.”

“You look fried.”

Yohan grabbed both of Haejun’s cheeks and squashed them together. He tilted his head back, then sideways, then lowered it to inspect the crown like a mom checking for injuries, examining him thoroughly before letting go.

“Me? I’m perfectly fine. Why.”

He frowned, but he knew it himself. Ever since kissing Lee Kangjoo, he’d been stuck in that memory all day like some kid who’d just had his first kiss.

Even while riding his bike, even while staring at his phone trying to catch calls, Kangjoo’s lips and that night kept flashing over everything. He’d missed quite a few calls because of it.

Haejun pretended to push Yohan away and covered his face with both hands. As if that would help—his ears and the backs of his hands were burning red.

He’d thought he was too exhausted to go on, but the kiss had lit him up again. He’d felt like he was about to collapse, yet he couldn’t reject Lee Kangjoo. Mixing tongues wasn’t enough. He’d wanted to connect as one body and run all the way to the end. Even when only watery fluid came out instead of semen, Haejun had just sniffled and kept going, never once telling him to stop.

Only after his face, his tongue, the inside of his hole, and even his stomach were smeared with Lee Kangjoo’s semen did it finally end. Haejun barely managed to keep himself conscious. His eyelids were more than half closed, but he forced them open. He wanted to see Kangjoo off.

Lee Kangjoo didn’t leave right away. He lay beside him and played with him. Propped up on one arm, head resting in his hand, [N O V E L I G H T] he fiddled with Haejun’s hair, stiff and spiked from dried semen. A faint, satisfied smile lingered on his lips—the subtle peace of a male who’d relieved his desire.

He pinched Haejun’s nipples, then grabbed his shrunken cock in that large hand. He rolled his empty balls in his palm, then held the shaft that fit entirely inside his hand and tugged the skin downward. As if the dangling flesh was endlessly fascinating, he toyed with the head and the tiny slit for a long while.

Haejun endured it with small groans. One wrong word and Kangjoo might leave. Fortunately, as if he had no intention of going further, Kangjoo gave the inside of Haejun’s thigh one firm squeeze before letting go.

‘You could stay the night.’

He timidly suggested it from behind as Kangjoo came out of the bathroom and dressed. As expected, Kangjoo declined. He patted Haejun’s head like a dog when he forced a smile.

‘Don’t make that face.’

‘Is my face weird?’

‘Very.’

‘Maybe I’m just sleepy.’

He changed the subject while watching Kangjoo put on his shoes. It was around five in the morning. Early winter—beyond the curtains, it was still deep night.

‘Sir.’

Kangjoo turned. Haejun stood at the entrance, hands hidden behind his back as if concealing his expression.

‘Come visit often. When you’re not here, the place feels empty.’

What he really wanted to say was that he’d missed him. But for some stupid reason, that was more embarrassing than begging for a kiss.

‘.......’

Suddenly, Kangjoo tilted his head and kissed him again. He gripped the back of Haejun’s neck firmly so he couldn’t escape, sweeping over his lips briefly but intensely, like a farewell.

‘See you next time.’

Stamping his lips once more, Kangjoo opened the door. Haejun remained frozen like ice until the sound of the door closing and the fading footsteps disappeared.

Then all at once, the strength left his legs and he collapsed to the floor. It hurt when he landed on his ass, but his face burned hotter than the pain. Especially his lips—bitten, pressed, sucked raw—they were hotter than any other part of his body.

‘Holy shit....’

Kangjoo should’ve been the one working as the prostitute. The man was a damn enchantress. One kiss and he’d set Haejun’s chest and body on fire. If he whispered “I love you” while kissing someone, they’d probably sell a kidney just to buy him a car key.

Coming back from the memory, Haejun dropped his hands from his face. The reddish glow had faded. But he couldn’t avoid Yohan’s look of exasperation.

“It’s that bastard, isn’t it.”

“No.”

“Look at you, lying already. Don’t waste your time lying to me, Cha Haejun.”

“Why don’t you go become a fortune teller? With that intuition you could buy ten buildings.”

Yohan snickered. One corner of his mouth sat higher than the other—a sneer.

“You’ve fallen. Totally fallen.”

“No. ...Not yet.”

He hoped not. It was just because it was his first kiss with a man. Just because it was his first time like that with one. The reason Lee Kangjoo kept lingering in his mind was only because he was his first male client.

Once Kangjoo lost interest and he started taking other clients again, those thoughts would vanish like nothing had happened. That’s what he believed.

Yohan scoffed.

“No point talking. Whatever I say, if you’re going to give him your heart anyway, at least don’t fall too deep. Like him only enough that you can walk away anytime.”

“Is that possible?”

Haejun asked innocently. Looking back over his life, he tried to find if there’d ever been someone who’d occupied his mind like this. No one. As a kid, he’d been too busy surviving. After losing his virginity, his only focus had been how to please clients well enough to squeeze out another bill.

So he didn’t know how to explain that warmth he felt when he looked at Lee Kangjoo, that sudden chill when he didn’t see him. Words like “like” or “love” felt too grand for someone like him. Those things weren’t meant to exist in his life.

“You make it possible. If it doesn’t work, call me. If you want to date, I’ll find you a decent guy and bring him over.”

“I don’t have the luxury to date. I’m broke. How would I even pay for dates.”

“I’ll bring you rich ones. But if that doesn’t work, just go somewhere far for a while. When the body gets distant, the heart does too.”

“Have you ever been like that?”

“Liked someone? Of course not. My only lover is money. Money is my girlfriend, my lover, my wife, my god.”

Declaring his faith was devoted solely to money, Yohan crossed himself and clasped his hands together. His face looked as solemn as a priest’s, but his heart was blasphemous as hell. If God saw him, he’d strike him with lightning on the spot.

“I wish you were like that too. Don’t give your heart to anything else.”

After finishing his mock prayer, Yohan looked at Haejun seriously. Haejun, making that slurping sound as he sucked coffee through ice, flinched and laughed like he’d been caught.

It didn’t feel like something he could do.