Chapter 195 I Do

When Li Yan seriously said, "I’m actually already married," Huang Ying just felt a bit short of breath and dizzy, but this outcome, in her view, was a matter of time even if it hadn’t happened before. Even if unexpected, it was still within reason. So, she tried to smile.

But she wasn’t good at disguising herself. All her thoughts showed on her face, and that smile was uglier than crying, making Li Yan feel extremely pained!

Li Yan reached out, pulled her over, and hugged her, continuing to say, "I have a wife, do you still wish to be with me? I’m not talking about a temporary arrangement, but taking care of you for a lifetime, being with me for a lifetime!"

To most people, such words are shameless and immoral. A girl might give a slap, saying, "You have a wife, and you still want to be with me? What care are you talking about? What do you take me for?"

But Huang Ying is different. Huang Ying had already agreed to be with him, and it was a degrading form of "support," even though Li Yan had always treated her well and didn’t take advantage of her young body. However, she couldn’t get past this hurdle herself; it had already breached her line of self-respect.

So now, this suggestion that seemed shameless to ordinary people was, in her ears, a pleasant surprise!

It was originally a matter of economic imbalance, maybe with emotional elements, but mainly, one side provided money and the other, feelings. Such contracts usually collapse in two situations.

One, when the supporter cannot meet financial expectations; two, when the supported falls short. When the man runs out of money, the supported woman often leaves; when the woman grows older and loses her beauty, the supporting man leaves. Further, if the woman finds another supporter willing to pay more for her, she might leave early; if the man gets bored and finds a fresher girl to support, he might leave early as well.

Overall, these arrangements, lasting from a few years to over a decade, are meals of youth, impossible to last. Of course, with high divorce rates in modern society, marriage cannot guarantee longevity either, and divorce after a few years might have even greater costs. This is why many people are willing to become kept women, due to this psychological mindset.

As an adult, Huang Ying understands these principles. So when she made her decision initially, she didn’t expect him to be with her indefinitely, just looking for a few years of reliance, waiting for her mother’s illness to heal, to have some savings herself, and for her brother to start working... She would then consider herself after being abandoned and separated. For the sake of family, this was a helpless decision she made.

But now, hearing Li Yan’s words, it seems he’s not just wanting to play with her body but intends to have a long-term development with her! Just the premise being he already has a wife, and their relationship may never see the light of day.

This was much better than Huang Ying’s initial expectations, and she never thought she could fully occupy Li Yan.

"Didn’t you ask me why I didn’t dismiss you?" Li Yan knew her emotions couldn’t be calm now, so he didn’t urge her to decide immediately but gently patted her back to comfort her, distracting her from her anxiety with conversation.

"Because I never thought of supporting you through a transactional method! At that time, I just couldn’t watch you marry someone casually. I wanted to share your difficulties with you, but you might have felt it as an unreturnable favor, unwilling to receive it, or not wanting to burden me, so you offered your most precious self. That’s not what I wanted, but to make you feel better, I had no choice but to agree.

Now you also understand that what you most need isn’t financial dependency, but psychological reliance and a spiritual pillar, you need to motivate yourself. What I thought back then was, to spend a year or a few years helping you through your family’s difficulties, allowing you to grow on your own. By then, you won’t need to rely on a man and can take care of your mother and brother well.

And if I took advantage and took your body, even if you were willing, you would surely regret it later. Just like how many in their youth work long hours and nights, exchanging health for money, willingly, yet regret when they spend money to maintain health in old age. I don’t want you to regret a difficult decision made in your youth for the rest of your life.

But now, my feelings for you have long since surpassed initial assistance, and your feelings for me are probably not gratitude or dependency anymore, I believe we have the feelings we need from each other between us now. However, I don’t want to deceive you. I can’t promise you when I’ll marry you, nor can I divorce my current wife anytime soon. So..."

After saying all this, Li Yan sighed lightly, "So I asked a relatively shameless question, wanting to wrong you to be with me..."

Huang Ying, who was in Li Yan’s arms, shook her head vigorously. Hearing Li Yan’s heartfelt words, she realized she hadn’t misjudged. This man was not scheming for anything, but wanted to help her in this way. What made her even happier was that he said they both already had the feelings they needed from each other, which she also felt.

"I do!"

Hearing Huang Ying’s soft but firm answer, Li Yan felt a surge of excitement. He already understood that getting them to accept each other, Huang Ying would be the best breakthrough, but even when she agreed, he couldn’t help but feel stirred.

He held Huang Ying tighter, "Are you sure? This means you’ll share a husband with another woman. Won’t it be too much of a grievance for you?"

Huang Ying blushed, not because of the boldness of the decision, but because he called himself ’husband’ for the first time.

"You got married first, letting me join is already my gain, the one truly aggrieved is her..."

"..." Li Yan understood this point too, he was speechless.

"Besides, sharing isn’t a grievance either. For example... my brother and I share the same mother without diluting anything. My mom loves me, and she loves my brother too, without conflict. I wouldn’t compete for anything, I’m satisfied if you treat me the same as before."

Li Yan didn’t know what to say, Huang Ying was just too satisfying! She had already persuaded herself without needing any counseling; it would be great if others were as easy to talk to as she was.

He pulled back a bit, looking at Huang Ying face-to-face, then said "Thank you," and kissed her lips. 𝕗𝕣𝐞𝐞𝘄𝐞𝚋𝚗𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗹.𝚌𝕠𝚖

!

...

After a while, the two parted. Huang Ying, a bit shy, withdrew into the seat, lowered her head, and glanced nervously outside. This was still in the car, in the neighborhood parking lot, it was very possible to run into acquaintances.

"Shall we go back?"

"Hmm?" Huang Ying’s barely audible small voice puzzled Li Yan, weren’t they out for shopping? Why want to go back.

"Then, let’s drive..." Huang Ying turned her head, not daring to look at him.

"Oh... got it..." Huang Ying busily started fastening her seatbelt.

Li Yan drove the car slowly out, one hand on the steering wheel, reaching out to hold Huang Ying’s hand, and said softly, "Remember what I just said? Besides not wanting you to regret, I also said that good things should be enjoyed slowly. You don’t need to be nervous, or feel it’s a burden like an exam."

"Mm..."

As the car moved outside, Li Yan retracted his hand to drive. After her emotions stabilized a bit, he brought up a rather heavy real-life issue, "Don’t you want to know who my wife is?"

Huang Ying shook her head, smiling shyly: "You’ve mentioned it before, but didn’t elaborate on your situation, so those who heard you thought you were joking..."

Li Yan nodded, Sun Hui was a clear example, if he believed Li Yan was married, he wouldn’t have included him in all the dating and fun plans with girls.

"Now that I think about it, you weren’t incapable, just didn’t care about bonuses while in the business department. Since you’re married and still without financial pressure, either your family is wealthy, or... her family is well-off." Even knowing this relationship layer, talking about Li Yan’s wife made her slightly awkward and unsure of how to address it. "And you dress rather frugally, so I think it should be the latter kind. Still, better not to say."

Li Yan was a bit surprised. That Huang Ying could analyze these things with such emotional ups and downs showed she had indeed grown and matured considerably!

"So, should we tell her about your situation?"

(This weekend brought mixed emotions, the joy of receiving cured meat and walnuts mailed by a friend for ’old dependable,’ and frustration over reports for a measly Qidian Coin reward causing old books to be heavily revised... sigh, utterly tragic.

Thanks for the rewards yesterday: dongmin8061, CP Pampas (to be continued, for more, please log onto www.qidian.com to support the author and authorized reading!)