Chapter 282: Jisung’s story 07: don’t want you anymore.

Jisung’s POV

I am aware of everything.

I am too aware for my own liking, and I can’t get him out.

His breathing, the way it changed when he heard my...bed partner’s moans, the sound of his tiny whimper, trying to stay quiet and uncaught.

I know it all, the way he started to leak, the musky smell of his precum.

How I was able to smell that? Hell, I can’t explain, it’s driving even me crazy and off the edge.

Why am I so in tune with him? I wish I knew too, I grunt, pressing my head the tiled wall of my bathroom where he washes his body last night.

Even when he snuck out this morning, I was awake on the couch, watching him run away and I felt a sick sense of relief...I scared him off.

"Jisungie?" Yeon’s voice calls from outside and I freeze up in the shower, already in a bad space of mind.

My brain is already dancing around the idea of the beta, and I don’t want to meet the one that can make it worse, fuck it.

"Son Jisung, are you drowning yourself in there?" he asks, banging on the door like I’m seventeen and he’s eighteen again.

"Fuck, Yeon, can’t you leave me alone?" I roar with all the frustration I am feeling.

I haven’t been able to cum in two days.

That woman beautiful with her body couldn’t do it for me, the young man with his pretty eyes couldn’t do it, I’m frustrated and don’t want to see him.

"Yah, open the door and say it to my face" Yeon yells, banging against the door even harder.

He sounds like he thinks I’m joking.

And unable to take it any longer, I open the door and step out, stalking towards him, naked, wet and out of my mind.

"Why wont you leave me alone? Aren’t you happy?" I snarl in his face, moving forward as he moves back.

"Jisung" he says my name as a warning.

"I want you-" I say.

No, that’s not it anymore, I don’t want him anymore, I love him, but I don’t want him like that, he’s not him.

"I want you to leave me alone" I say like I’m begging him and I force myself to move away him with shaky steps.

"I can’t do that" Yeon says as he calmly turns around and takes clothes out of my drawer to throw them at me, unphased by my violence.

"I can’t leave you alone, you can’t leave me, you know I love you to death, Sung, and I don’t care if you hate me for not loving you back"

"Hyung"

"Shut up and listen to me, I don’t care if you hate me, you won’t live miserably because of me" he snaps and I squeeze the clothes in my hands.

"And if you like men, that’s up to you, this is your home, you’re meant to be comfortable and happy" he says and wipes tears off his eyes.

I need a good fuck, I need a better fuck, I need...I need to breathe.

"Live life, Jisung, fucking live" hyung orders and storms out of the room while my legs give out.

I hate myself for loving him, I hate that Hwang boy for showing up, and I hate myself for ever holding on.

I put on the clothes he picked for me without drying off and I leave for training room, not minding the way the grey shirt exposes my wetness.

The trainees stop when I walk in and my eyes immediately find Seohwa, but he’s not looking at me, he’s looking at the floor.

I really scared him off.

My subordinate starts the activities of the day and I watch them, but I can’t keep my focus, my eyes keep following that beta.

Seohwa, the strangely interesting man isn’t trying today.

He isn’t trying to hold my attention, and it stings, he got my attention, now he’s looking away.

"Good job, keep it up" my subordinate yells, marking the end of the session.

My alpha is impatient and growling inside my chest, and I know I might go crazy if I don’t get out of here, I pull myself up and leave the room.

I keep panting as I make my way back to my apartment, maybe I need cleaner air, or I need to leave the pack for a few days.

Or, I have to go to the club, find a newer body to own for the night and get that man out of my system.

My body doesn’t move till it’s late, till everywhere is dark enough and I feel like a predator enough.

The moment I get into the loud and bright club, I’m immersed in the thick smell of beastlike lust, instinctual hunger and everything forbidden to human senses.

The young man from last night spots me, and once he does, he gives me a seductive smile.

One part of me wants to ignore him, but another part of me finds it hard to ignore the way he looks, the hungry look in his eyes.

He lifts a brow smoothly and I nod, making my way to the bathroom, the first testing ground of this night.

And once I’m in the bathroom, the man I’m expecting comes in, but before he touches me, the bathroom door is pushed open and Seohwa comes in.

He looks beautiful dressed in black, the same outfit he wore that night, this little minx.

"I’m sorry, but he’s with me" Seohwa says to the man I came with, and I tilt my head.

"What do you mean?" my partner asks, deeply offended and I nod at him, asking him to leave.

"I’m with you?" I ask and Seohwa nods as he comes closer to me.

"Do you know me?" I drop my voice to a whisper as I ask, and he trembles slightly, standing right in front of me like a sacrifice.

"You want me, I saw you looking at me" he dares to say with shaky voice and I chuckle, grabbing his throat.

"You have no idea how I want you, I want to fuck you, fuck you full of my cum and leave you dripping"

"Is that all?" he asks in a whisper, and I squeeze his throat lightly.

"Pleasure only, nothing more" I warn and he gulps, Adam apple bobbing under my finger.

"Nothing more" he says and stands on his tip toe to press our lips together in a hungry kiss.