Jordan pressed the button.

The screen exploded with golden light again. The wheel materialized and started spinning, icons blurring together into an incomprehensible mass of color. This time Jordan watched the wheel more carefully. He caught glimpses of the images as they flickered past. Some looked valuable. Others looked useless. He saw what might have been a car. A bag of money. A dumbbell. A question mark.

The wheel slowed.

Slowed.

Stopped.

===

✨ BRONZE GACHA RESULT ✨ 𝓯𝙧𝙚𝒆𝙬𝙚𝒃𝙣𝙤𝒗𝓮𝓵.𝙘𝙤𝙢

[Ceaseless Discharge]

|Trash Trait|

Not the one from the video game.

Seminal fluid regeneration rates have been optimized to near-instantaneous levels. Total volume capacity and expulsion metrics substantially magnified.

(System Note: Please utilize responsibly. You are already a documented biohazard.)

===

Jordan read the notification.

Read it again.

Blinked.

"You’ve got to be fucking kidding me."

He stared at his phone screen like it had personally insulted his mother. The golden interface glowed cheerfully back at him, completely unaware that it had just handed him the most useless power imaginable.

Ceaseless Discharge. Trash Tier.

Jordan wanted to laugh. Or cry. Or throw his phone out the window and drive into the ocean.

This is what happens when you gamble. You get abs and immediate reload speed for your dick.

He closed the gacha interface and opened his status screen instead.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

JORDAN McKNIGHT

ACTIVE TRAITS:

[Tune Up] - Rare

Body optimized to peak genetic potential. Maintenance required.

[Ceaseless Discharge] - Trash

Regeneration substantially increased. Volume substantially increased.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Two traits. One actually useful. One absolutely worthless unless he planned to start his own OnlyFans account.

Although...

Jordan’s brain supplied an unwanted image of Chloe sitting on her couch in Unit 403, looking at him with those blue eyes.

Nope. Stop. She’s your neighbor. She’s also a transaction. Do not go down that road.

But the System had registered her at twenty percent attraction. That was twelve percent higher than when they’d started lunch. Something he was doing was working.

And now he had abs.

Jordan checked his reflection in the rearview mirror one more time. His new face looked back at him, sharp and defined. He lifted his shirt slightly and confirmed the abs were still there. Real. Solid. His V-line cut down toward his jeans like an arrow pointing at his newly upgraded reload speed.

This is the stupidest day of my life.

Also possibly the best.

Jordan started his car and pulled out of the Target parking lot. Traffic was lighter now, mostly people heading home from work or going out for dinner. He merged onto PCH and let the road carry him south toward The Cooper Garment Lofts.

His phone buzzed.

Jordan glanced at it. A notification from his banking app. He’d received a direct deposit.

His stomach dropped.

Jordan pulled into a gas station parking lot and opened the app with shaking hands.

RECENT TRANSACTIONS

Deposit: $500.00

Source: INFINITE CASHBACK SYSTEM

Date: January 10, 8:47 PM

Note: Milestone Bonus - Registered Beauty Slot 1 Activated

Balance: $1,910.29

Five hundred dollars. Just appeared. No explanation beyond "milestone bonus."

Jordan sat there staring at his phone.

This morning I was a virgin loser crying over a girl who never liked me. Tonight I have abs and nineteen hundred dollars and a neighbor who might actually think I’m interesting.

Jordan looked at his reflection. The guy in the mirror looked back with sharp features and clear eyes and the kind of body that took normal people months to build.

The warning flashed through his mind again. Not permanent. Maintenance required.

Jordan pulled out of the gas station and headed home. He needed to sleep. Tomorrow he had classes. Real classes. That he would actually attend. Because the System was watching, and the System kept score, and Jordan was done being the kind of person who wasted opportunities.

His phone buzzed again.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

DAILY QUEST RESET: 00:00:01

New objectives available in 3 hours, 11 minutes.

Rest recommended.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Jordan drove home. The Cooper Garment Lofts appeared on his right, industrial brick walls lit by streetlights. He parked in his usual spot three spaces down from Chloe’s white Civic and killed the engine.

Unit 403’s windows were dark.

Jordan grabbed his phone and headed inside. The lobby was empty. The elevator arrived immediately. He rode up to the fourth floor alone, walked down the hallway past Unit 403 without looking at it, and unlocked his own door.

His apartment was clean. Actually clean. Floors visible. Kitchen gleaming. No trash bags. No crusty socks. No evidence of the person he used to be.

Jordan climbed the stairs to his loft and collapsed onto his bed. The sheets were fresh from the dryer. His mattress still had some questionable stains, but the baking soda had done its job.

He pulled out his phone one last time.

💝 CASHBACK SYSTEM

ACTIVE CONNECTIONS

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Chloe Kim 📍

Chemistry: 20% ▰▰▱▱▱▱▱▱▱▱

Return Rate: 0.4x

Last interaction: 2 hours, 8 minutes ago

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Jordan set his phone on his nightstand and closed his eyes. His body felt good. Better than good. Perfect, actually. No aches. No soreness. Just clean energy humming through every muscle.

Tomorrow he’d go to class. He’d talk to people. He’d use his new body and his new face and his clean apartment to start building the life he should have had all along.

Tonight he’d sleep.

The last thought that crossed his mind before unconsciousness took him was this:

I wonder what silver gacha gives you.

===

[A/N:]

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