When A-Xuan looked up Yang Zan’s smile was gone. He said with difficulty:

"Yang Jian is obsessed with me for some reason. He doesn’t want to let me go, I don’t know if it’s because I survived his drowning or if he sees someone in me but he never wants me to leave the estate. I even had to beg him so I could go home yesterday to get more clothes."

Yang Zan felt uncomfortable hearing that, he knows how obsessed his brother was to find that person from his dream but it’s only because he lost everyone he had and it’s the only thing he can hold onto.

So it isn’t shocking that now that he believes he found him he wants to lock him in his home. He also feels the same way so he can’t blame his brother for feeling that way.

He asked:

"Do you not like him?"

A-Xuan answered:

"I don’t."

I love him, A-Xuan only thought that part.

Yang Zan asked:

"Do you want to leave him?"

"I can’t."

Yang Zan asked:

"Why?"

"Because my father needs back up from a strong clan and my sister she..."

A-Xuan didn’t finish. He looked down and played nervously with his hands.

Yang Zan sat next to him, he put a hand on his and asked:

"What about your sister?"

A-Xuan said:

"I would rather live in Yang Jian’s estate miserable than see her ever again. I know she hates me and wants me dead. She’s the reason he tried to drown me in the first place. If she didn’t drug me and toss me in his courtyard I would’ve never met Yang Jian. I’ll only run away from his estate the day she dies."

Yang Zan asked:

"If she dies tomorrow you’ll leave him?"

"I will, even if I want to help my clan I can’t stay. I’ll leave the country."

"You don’t have to."

A-Xuan insisted:

"I do."

Yang Zan reassured him:

"I’ll deal with your sister and when she’s gone you can stay with me until I speak to my brother. I’ll help your clan too."

A-Xuan pulled his hand away and looked at him warily.

"Why? What do you want from me?"

Yang Zan said in a soft voice:

"I only want to be with you. You can do whatever you want just be mine too."

"Why? I don’t understand, what do you see in me?"

Yang Zan approached him and said with sparkling eyes:

"I don’t know I can’t explain it but I fell in love with you. Not for the person people think you are but for you."

A-Xuan felt weirdly touched, he felt like his words were an echo of what his husband would say. They are brothers so that’s not surprising.

"I’m not a good person so there’s no way you love me for me."

A-Xuan tears fell and Yan Zan wiped them. A-Xuan looked up sharply and his eyes widened in incredulity. What the fuck is going on? He put a hand on Yang Zan’s cheek and closed his eyes.

A-Xuan opened his eyes shocked. He got up walked backward and ran out of the private room. Yang Zan ran after him alarmed. A-Xuan’s mind blurred and he tripped. Before his body hit the ground Yang Zan pulled him up.

A-Xuan tried to get free but Yang Zan wouldn’t let go. He stopped struggling to look at him as his chest went up and down. Yan Zan held him in his embrace, when he felt he was calmer he pulled him into his car.

A-Xuan sat obediently not saying a word. After Yang Zan sent the chauffeur away he held his chin and turned his head. A-Xuan looked at him not saying anything. After a few minutes, more tears fell and Yang Zan wiped them again.

A-Xuan asked in a trembling voice:

"How is this possible?"

Yang Zan pulled him on his lap and said full of certainty:

"You love me."

A-Xuan closed his eyes to hide away all those tumultuous emotions. He felt this shock of electricity when he wiped his tears again.

Even if he felt weirdly comfortable when he was close to Yang Zan he thought it was only because he’s Yang Jian’s twin brother but it’s not. How could his soul split? I can’t even fix it in this world.

He saw Yang Zan’s life growing up too and he had it just as bad as Yang Jian. A-Xuan opened his eyes and admitted:

"I lied."

Yang Zan tightened his hold.

"About what?"

A-Xuan confessed:

"What I said about Yang Jian, I love him. I plan on sending my father to jail and destroying his clan. My sister will die, I wanted her to die at your hands because I knew you had feelings for me. I knew it would break her even more since you’ve been flirting with her the past two weeks."

A-Xuan’s last sentence was said with anger. He looked at Yang Zan intently wanting to see his reaction.

Yang Zan looked down thinking and asked:

"If you love my brother why are you telling me all of this?"

"Because I wanted to destroy you too for abandoning him."

Yang Zan’s eyes widened as hurt passed through them. He knows he acted like a coward and left his twin the moment he needed him the most. He just couldn’t face him anymore after he found out the truth about their mother.

He pretended to be after the throne so they would fight and he would use it as an excuse to leave. He had no plan on killing A-Xuan either, he had men planted all around to make sure nothing would go wrong.

He just wanted to get him back for his brother. He didn’t think he would fall for him. He never thought in a million years that he and his brother were dreaming of the same person.

While his brother talked to him about it Yang Zan couldn’t, he ignored the dreams night after night.

He was stressed enough after finding out the truth so he didn’t let himself feel disappointed for not finding the person in his dreams.

Yan Zan looked at him and asked:

"What about now?"

A-Xuan whispered:

"I can’t."

"Why?"

"Because I..."

Yang Zan lifted his head.

"You love me too."

A-Xuan swallowed with difficulty.

"I do but I also love your brother."

A-Xuan feels like he’s going crazy. He knows he can’t destroy Yang Zan and live the rest of his life in peace with Yang Jian. They’re the same person which means he can’t hurt or live without either of them.

Yang Zan murmured:

"I see."

He can’t explain his love for A-Xuan but he knows that he can’t live without him. Yang Zan called his chauffeur and after giving him the direction to his brother’s estate he held A-Xuan in his arms.

A-Xuan hugged him back not saying anything. Even if he can’t be with his husband in this life at least he’ll make sure they reunite before he leaves this world. He saw how Yang Zan tried to protect his brother from the truth.

He felt heartbroken seeing him all these years living with such a life-changing secret.

Yang Jian was in his walk-in closet when he heard the door opening.

"How did it go?"

When he couldn’t hear anything he walked out and his eyes widened in shock. He walked to A-Xuan and pulled him away from Yang Zan.

"Why are you here?"

Yang Zan looked at A-Xuan, Yang Jian’s eyes immediately turned sharp. A-Xuan held his hand and reassured him:

"It’s not what you think just listen to what he has to say."

Yang Jian calmed down a little and looked at his brother.

"I have to tell you the truth. I didn’t leave because I wanted to."

"Everyone knows you were after the throne."

"I only used that as an excuse so I could run away."

Yang Zan approached him and said with difficulty:

"I lost it when I found out what really happened to mother."

Yang Jian took a step back and warned:

"We don’t have to talk about that I already know what happened to her."

"She wasn’t killed by a rival clan father did."

Yang Jian stumbled back and fell onto the bed. He shook his head.

"No you’re lying, you just want to break me so you can take the throne."

Yan Zan advanced, he squatted and looked into his eyes.

"I never wanted the throne and I never wanted you to have it either because I know this isn’t what she wanted. This is why father killed her. She was planning on running away with us but he found out. A few years later I overheard a conversation and father knew I would never tell you the truth because I knew you wouldn’t be able to handle it. He created discord between us and when I couldn’t take it anymore I left using the throne as an excuse."

Yang Jian looked at him as tears poured down his face. A-Xuan knelt in front of him and wiped them.

A-Xuan knows that he believes what Yan Zan said but he doesn’t want him to doubt him even a little bit.

He said:

"I have the surveillance video of that night if you want to see it. In the end, you’ll only hear the gunshot."

A-Xuan handed him a tablet and Yang Jian clicked on the video. When it ended the tablet fell on the floor breaking.