Doomed to be Cannon Fodder (Web Novel) - Chapter 3: An Old Warbird, Must Not Attract Trouble

His name was 25. On Avalis, he was just one of many tasked with fulfilling missions for Earth’s people. This time, he was given a simple one—live as Zeno Han and have an ordinary life.Easy. Or so he thought.The moment he took over Zeno’s body, someone shoved a script into his hands. “You’ll be perfect for this role!” And just like that, he was on set.[Fame Meter: Unable to Measure. Off the charts.]Doctor? Check. Pilot? Check. Eunuch? …Regrettably, check. Every script forces him to relive past missions, and somehow, he’s nailing every performance. Now, the industry wants to make him a star, but can he still complete his mission? Or will fame—and the terrifying unknown of failure—be his final curtain call?

The Fake Life of a Villainess: Reincarnated as a villainous noblewoman, you become an experience bag for the protagonist on their journey. You are the target of the maid’s revenge, your half-sister takes away everything that belongs to you, and the grand princess who cared for you for many years finally loses hope and abandons you. The Real Life of a Villainess: You clean up the mess left behind by the protagonist when they disappear. And in their place, you teach her that as a maid, she shouldn’t always be thinking about…

Raelis Varekan was born into royalty but treated like trash. With 0% bloodline purity, he was branded a failure, framed for treason, and executed without a second thought.But despite his expectations, he had come back to the time he was twelve years old, standing in front of the same bloodline testing orb. But this time, something changed.His former 0% bloodline purity was gone, replaced by a 1% result.And with it came something no one else could see: a system that let him grow stronger.[Ding!][+1% Bloodline Purity][Total Bloodline Purity: 2% (Ash)][Next Bloodline Rank at 10% Purity: Ember]With the future burned into his memory and a strange system tracking his growth, Raelis wouldn't make the same mistakes twice. He would become strong and he would use every tool he had to survive the academy and outmaneuver his siblings and the nobles who once betrayed him.And most importantly...Raelis would rise through the ranks and become the one who rewrites the Varekan Empire’s history.

Isabella was supposed to be sipping champagne at a luxury spa, not waking up in the middle of a forest. Worse, a SYSTEM had attached itself to her like some clingy ex, spouting nonsense about survival, quests, and—oh, hell no—manual labor.“System, I was NOT built for the wilderness! My ideal ‘roughing it’ experience involves a five-star hotel with bad WiFi!”Now, instead of lounging in silk robes, she’s being ordered to farm? To hunt?“A farming quest? You want me—a city girl—to grow food? System, I once killed a cactus by overwatering it. This is NOT my calling!”And don’t even get her started on the hygiene situation.“You want me to bathe in a cold river? Darling, I require warm water, scented oils, and an ambience! What do I look like—some barbarian?!”Unfortunately, the locals—big, muscular beastmen—don’t seem to understand the concept of self-care. The women? Neglecting their skin like it’s a crime to be radiant. The men? Walking hygiene disasters.“Ladies, if your man can smell you before he sees you, we have a problem.”“You see this? This is lotion. It exists so you don’t look like a dried-up leaf. Use it.”“A beard should be majestic, not tragic. Let me fix it.”And the beastmen? They don’t just stare at her like she’s an oddity. No, they hover. They smirk. They lean in too close, fangs flashing with amusement.“Why do you keep looking at me like that?” she huffed, crossing her arms.The panther grinned, his tail flicking. “Because you’re fascinating when you’re annoyed.”No, absolutely not. She was not here for this nonsense.“If you have time to stare, you have time to moisturize.”She didn’t ask to be here. She didn’t ask to be their savior. But if she has to suffer through this world, she’s making everyone around her suffer less—through skincare, style, and some serious attitude.“If I hear one more ‘We don’t season our food here,’ I’m launching a war.”“If you have time to gossip, you have time to do squats.”“You want to impress a woman? Start with not smelling like the battlefield.”Survival isn’t just about fighting monsters; it’s about looking good while doing it. So what if the System keeps throwing impossible quests her way?“What do you mean ‘you can’t skip quests’?! Since when?! Where is the skip button?! I demand a skip button!”But somewhere between dodging ridiculous quests and fixing these people’s tragic grooming habits, Isabella found herself in situations. Uncomfortable, heart-racing situations.Like being trapped against a tree by the red python, his red eyes half-lidded as he murmured, “You talk too much, little star. Should I silence you?”Like waking up with the lion lord’s fur-lined cloak draped over her shoulders, his deep voice gruff, “You shiver in your sleep. I’ll fix that.”Like the phoenix watching her every move, his burning gaze searing into her skin as he mused,“You cause chaos wherever you go, but I find that I don’t mind.”Oh, hell. No. She was not about to fall for four beastmen. She was too pretty for this much stress.“If you insult me again, I’ll make sure your soul needs a beauty upgrade.”“I refuse to be disrespected by anyone who dresses like an unwashed tree branch.”And yet, when a rival tribe came to challenge her, when danger lurked too close, those same beastmen stood beside her—smirking, taunting, fighting for her.“A beastman growled at me today. I growled back. He ran. I am the alpha now.”Isabella isn’t just surviving. She’s thriving. And this world better keep up.