Intoxication - Chapter 26: A Fucking Joke

“Impossible… Why are you not following my orders!? Clearly I sucked your blood, why!?”

On the very first day of high school, the youth subscribing to the philosophy of “absolutely ordinary everyday life,” Kujou Hisui, encountered disaster head on: He was attacked by Rushella Daamu Draculea, the vampire who had lost her memory. Rushella was greatly intrigued to find her vampire powers ineffective against Hisui. Not only did she make Hisui’s home her own, she even enrolled in his school to stick to him–

Hisui had no choice but to help Rushella regain her memory. But before one crisis could be resolved, many more had risen. With tempting advances from the mysterious Sudou Mei, and kidnapped by the girl from the Supernatural Investigations Section in search of Rushella, Hisui’s ordinary life has been replaced by its complete opposite, drama–

Romantic comedy and supernatural action in a school setting!

Saying 5000 year-old-dragon has an impressive ring to it, yet that dragon was an extremely harmless, herbivorous being. However, because of his uselessly giant figure and scary appearance, he was mistaken for the Demon King’s executive and provided by the nearby village with a sacrificial maiden.

Fundamentally cowardly and timid dragon tried to send her away, but the extremely enthusiastic sacrifice didn’t want to give up. Inevitably, he lied: “Okay, I just ate a small portion of your soul, so you can go back already”, but the maiden with outrageous assumptions has misunderstood that she became the dragon’s kin.

Then, out of all things, she began to manifest strange power on the basis of her wrong assumptions – in turn, the helpless dragon, by some mistake started a rebellion against the Demon King.

Rebellion or whatnot, he wasn’t even his subordinate in the first place.

What if being the protagonist was actually the WORST possible choice?Li Hanfeng thought he'd gotten the short end of the reincarnation stick—transmigrated into a cultivation world with “only” Upper Grade spiritual roots. Sure, he joined the prestigious Shushan Sect, but compared to those Heavenly Grade chosen ones? He was clearly destined to be a background character.Then his golden finger awakened.The Karma Detection System.Suddenly, Li Hanfeng could see the true cost of every “opportunity” before him. That mysterious cave everyone's excited about?[Great Karma: Ancient Tomb][Death Rate: 97%].The beautiful junior sister asking him on a “simple” mission?[Path of Destiny][Triggers: Sect Destruction, Heavenly Tribulation, Outer Domain Demons].Wait... being the protagonist means a 90% chance of horrible death?!NOPE.While other disciples fight over “destiny” and “fortune,” Li Hanfeng discovers something incredible: his system doesn't just detect karma—it “rewards him for avoiding it”. Refuse a death flag mission? Get premium cultivation pills! Skip the mysterious inheritance? Unlock rare techniques! Dodge the protagonist route entirely?His cultivation speed actually INCREASES.“Junior Sister, I'm busy that day.”“Senior Brother, that treasure isn't for me.”“Sorry everyone, I'll pass on saving the world.”[Karma Severed Successfully! Reward: Immortal-Grade Technique]But there's a problem: the more protagonist flags he dodges, the stronger he becomes. And the stronger he becomes, the more the world tries to drag him into main character scenarios.Ancient masters want him as a disciple. Mysterious beauties keep appearing. Evil sects mark him as a threat. Even his own karma system seems shocked by how overpowered his “background character” route is becoming.Li Hanfeng just wanted to cultivate peacefully and avoid death flags.Instead, he accidentally became the most terrifying existence in the cultivation world.The kind of person who's so strong that destiny itself has given up trying to make him the protagonist.

Yukima Azuma—charismatic, confident, and utterly unforgettable. He was the man every girl wanted but could never truly keep. One by one, they fell for him, only to be left with memories they couldn’t erase.Kasumigaoka Utaha: “I was his first, the one who taught him love… only for him to use it on other women.”Sawamura Eriri: “If I hadn’t been such a tsundere, maybe things would have been different.”Yukinoshita Yukino: “He was my light in the darkness, the only one who ever truly saw me.”Yukinoshita Haruno: “That bastard ran away after taking everything from me.”Hoshino Ai: “My only true love. The one I can never replace.”And when asked about their relationship with him?“Ex-girlfriend.”But to the women still in his life?Sora Ginko, Kato Megumi, Sagiri, Bocchi, Shinomiya Kaguya, Kirisu Mafuyu, Suou Yuki, Alya—“Thieving cats.”Because no matter how much time passed, no matter how far he went—one truth remained: Yukima Azuma was the one man they could never forget.