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... was taken aback when she laid eyes on the gifts.

The ten pieces of jade, porcelain, and gold-plated purple copperware were all exquisite, clearly treasures of tribute grade. The intricate designs, fine craftsmanship, and intricate details garnered admiration from the depths of her heart.

This left Qiao Xuan feeling inexplicably guilty. It seemed that gifting the Crown Prince a mere 30,000 taels of silver might have seemed rather paltry…

This was an extraordinary windfall ...

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“They Call Guys Like Me a Simp.”(Meanwhile, I’m out here living what their favorite MC only dreams about.)You ever notice how stories glorify the ones who feel nothing?The MC who never laughs.Never feels.Who plays women like chess pieces and calls it intelligence.He manipulates a girl? “He’s strategic.”He never opens up? “He’s mysterious.”He never flinches, never laughs, never lives —And you call that strength?Funny.Because to me?That’s just a prison in disguise.You see an “alpha.”I see a boy too scared to feel anything real.While they spend ten chapters monologuing about logic and sacrifice,I’m already making the Saintess scream,drenched in sin,halo cracked,legs trembling from truths her prayers never taught her.And I didn’t get there with cold eyes or control.I got there with laughter and chill. With warmth. With a grin and a hand on her thigh.I didn’t need to dominate her mind —I freed her heart.But that scares people, doesn’t it?Because readers trust the ones who suffer.Who stay quiet.Who kill without blinking and love without showing it.But me?I flirt.I laugh.I take hits and smile back, bloody and defiant, as if too weak to get angry.I don’t need to pretend emotions are weakness.I weaponize mine.Pleasure. Connection. Laughter.That’s my arsenal.And while your favorite MC is still calculating his next five moves,Trying to outwit death and romance like both are math problems,I’m already balls deep in the jade fairy — her sacred yin furnace clenching like it’s worshipping my shaft, her Dao Echo shattered into breathless moans, and her so-called cultivation path leaking down her thighs while she begs me to break her meridians again.You call that luck?Nah.That’s mastery of the three worlds.Because in a world that respects coldness,I came in hot.Where others manipulate, I connect.Where they posture, I play.Where they sacrifice, I seduce.So go ahead.Call me a simp.But while your genius MC is busy monologuing about destiny,I’m the one making goddesses question theirs —with a smirk, a touch, and no regrets.I’m not the hero.Not the villain.I’m just a simp… the kind who leaves your cold, emotionless MC’s woman dripping, ruined, and too stretched to go back to him.

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“We call it distortion, but perhaps, the history records of later generations will call it an evolution.”

The world experienced involution.

Today, that person’s head split into two. Tomorrow, that flower would grow fangs. The day after that, that fish would climb ashore with its legs…

Lu Yan: And I am merely a mediocre doctor who treats the pollution disease.

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Patient A: When I first grew 18 tentacles, I was having a great time eating [beep—] by the seaside. As soon as Dr. Lu came, he cut 17 of them for me. He’s really a brilliant doctor!2

Patient B: I am a poisonous mushroom. My spores are highly toxic and can be parasitic. I gave birth to hundreds of thousands of microspores, which made it worse for my already poor family. Dr. Lu helped me practice family planning when he came. This great kindness will forever be remembered!

Patient C: I have eight mouths. I was a picky eater and only ate meat, so I set up a slaughterhouse for this purpose. But then, Dr. Lu cured my picky eating. This woman of faith is willing to be a vegetarian for the rest of her life in exchange for Dr. Lu’s happiness and well-being in this life.

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Not to mention that the game can make money, can the power obtained in the game have the opportunity to bring it to reality?!

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The future me even brought me three golden fingers!

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