The Calamitous Bob - Chapter 119: The Fetch Quest.

I was a failed experiment

Finn, your average college student with one noble goal: get home and watch some quality adult content in peace. Tragically, fate had other plans. A truck barreled toward him… then stopped halfway. The driver locked eyes with Finn—and hit him anyway.Now he’s dead.Wakes up in some divine waiting room. Gets mocked by a sarcastic, busty goddess. Gets offered the most useless powers imaginable.And worst of all? Still no porn.Frustrated beyond mortal comprehension, Finn throws an epic tantrum and drags the goddess down into the fantasy world with him. Now stuck in a realm full of grotesque monsters, cursed towns, and suspiciously moist terrain, Finn has no idea what he’s doing. No clue. No dignity. Suffering most of the time.With zero powers, infinite horniness, and one very angry divine companion, can Finn survive this absurd new world?Can he dodge death, outwit demonic squirrels, and maybe—just maybe—score a waifu?Or will he die in this world too…still painfully uncuddled?Let the absurd isekai disaster begin.[WARNING: THIS BOOK IS UNHINGED. DO NOT TAKE OFFENSE TO ANYTHING—IT’S ALL FOR COMEDIC PURPOSES. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED.]

In his first life as 'Caine Wilson', was the villain—ruthless, cunning, and very powerful.He played his part perfectly, crushing the so-called “protagonist” and parading his enemies, their families, and anyone who crossed him naked through the streets.He watched with glee as the “hero” lay broken, stripped of his dignity, before finally ending his pitiful existence.But just as Caine, thought he had finally won and secured his place at the top, 'Higher ups' intervened.A booming, ethereal voice—like the universe’s pissed-off judge—shook the skies:“You have violated the sacred code of villainy! The villain shall not win. The balance has been broken. Caine Wilson, the world hereby rejects you!”Before he could even enjoy his victory, his world blinked out, like a story whose writer just erased the last chapter in frustration.Everything went dark.And when he awoke, he wasn’t Caine Wilson anymore.He was 'Su Xiaobai', a nobody on 'White Cloud Star', a world of cultivation, martial arts, and endless struggle.But this time, things were different.He could feel it—he could see through the cracks of reality itself.He could break the fourth wall!He wasn’t just some reincarnated soul; he was a villain who had 'seen the system', who understood the game.And he was about to flip it upside down.

“Feng Tianyi! Your brother destroyed my Tang family! Is there anything good about your family?”

“En. Can’t you see how our good looking genes are passed on to our children? As for the Feng family’s debt, I will pay you.” He said nonchalantly.

Tang Moyu scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

“How will you pay for it?”

“How about I repay you with my body?”

“...”

So shameless!

The man sitting on his wheelchair burst into a round of laughter seeing her ugly expression.

“Miss Tang, it’s no point pretending you haven’t seen it since you practically climbed on my bed and took advantage of me.”

Five years ago, Tang Moyu was the empress of the business world and was at the peak of her career before she was reduced to nothing when her fiance fell in love with another woman. That was okay since there was no love between her and Feng Tianhua, but who would have thought that this ‘Cinderella’ was a wolf in sheep’s clothing?

Then there’s Feng Tianyi, the infamous successor of the Feng family, a critically acclaimed author who constantly rocked the bestselling list with his books. Rumors say that he was hot-headed and temperamental. He was so ruthless, that neither men nor women wanted his company. The rumors even say that his face was so handsome and out of this world. He was practically a god amongst men. It was a pity that he was crippled.

The two were never meant to meet again, but a pair of sweet little buns intervened.

“Uncle, we don’t have money to pay you for damages.” The elder Little Bun said.

“My manuscripts are invaluable,” This handsome uncle replied with amusement.

“Uncle, if you don’t mind, can we pay with our Mommy? She’s also invaluable.”

And so the pair of sweet little buns and the handsome uncle entered an agreement but who would have thought that the woman in question was an ice-cold queen from hell who had a weird affinity with sweets?