The Healer Demands Payment! - Chapter 4.1: Part 1 Rumor (I)

A new emperor rules each year in Yohuachanca.Only the most delicious of food graces his palate; the realm’s most beautiful women fill his harem; his palace dazzles the mind in its beauty; and four priestesses counsel him in all matters. The life of an emperor is good, luxurious, and short. For at the year’s end, he is sacrificed to the Nightlords under the light of the Scarlet Moon.I am Iztac. A pisspoor orphan and the year’s emperor. A sacrifice bound for the altar. But the vampires have made a mistake this time. For I am a sorcerer, whose soul journeys into the secret underworld to plunder the secret spells of the dead. There, in the darkness, hides the power to drag the Nightlords off their throne. I have a year to find it, or perish for good.I may not be the first emperor, but I will be the last.

Finn, your average college student with one noble goal: get home and watch some quality adult content in peace. Tragically, fate had other plans. A truck barreled toward him… then stopped halfway. The driver locked eyes with Finn—and hit him anyway.Now he’s dead.Wakes up in some divine waiting room. Gets mocked by a sarcastic, busty goddess. Gets offered the most useless powers imaginable.And worst of all? Still no porn.Frustrated beyond mortal comprehension, Finn throws an epic tantrum and drags the goddess down into the fantasy world with him. Now stuck in a realm full of grotesque monsters, cursed towns, and suspiciously moist terrain, Finn has no idea what he’s doing. No clue. No dignity. Suffering most of the time.With zero powers, infinite horniness, and one very angry divine companion, can Finn survive this absurd new world?Can he dodge death, outwit demonic squirrels, and maybe—just maybe—score a waifu?Or will he die in this world too…still painfully uncuddled?Let the absurd isekai disaster begin.[WARNING: THIS BOOK IS UNHINGED. DO NOT TAKE OFFENSE TO ANYTHING—IT’S ALL FOR COMEDIC PURPOSES. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED.]

The notorious imperial court lackey and the meritorious military general were well-known for their mutual dislike, a pair of arch-enemies set in stone. Who could have foreseen the unexpected change in the winds of heaven: the general injured on the battlefield, both legs disabled, and even forced by the emperor to marry his nemesis.With one marriage edict, two people with mutual hostility are forced to marry and live under the same roof. Yet after these long days together, they come to the realization that this fellow is not truly devoid of any saving grace/unattainable and high out of reach.

Xiang Yu was perfectly content with his mediocre life on Earth—average job, average apartment, average everything. That is, until he woke up in the legendary World of Cultivation, where martial artists fly through the skies and immortals battle over ancient treasures.There's just one problem: Xiang Yu wants absolutely NONE of that action.Armed with only his wits and a peculiar system that doubles his exp every 24 hours, Xiang Yu has one goal: become powerful enough to live in peace without getting involved in those ridiculous “protagonist” situations. No ancient tombs. No tournament arcs. And for heaven's sake, stay FAR away from anyone named Chen Mo, Lin Feng, or Li Yao—those names practically scream “main character who will drag me into deadly situations!”Starting with strength stats so pathetic he can barely lift a cultivation manual, Xiang Yu must somehow survive long enough for his exponential growth to matter. After all, doubling zero cultivation talent still equals zero... at first.Follow Xiang Yu on his hilarious journey from zero to hero as he desperately tries to stay invisible while his power skyrockets beyond control! Watch as he dodges cultivation tournaments, avoids suspicious elders bearing gifts, and runs the other way whenever someone mentions “ancient inheritance” or “chosen one.”Join the adventure of the most reluctant cultivator in history whose only wish is peace and quiet, but whose exponential growth makes him the most terrifying force this cultivation world has ever seen!