The Reincarnated Assassin is a Genius Swordsman - Chapter 1

They were born with magic, raised in chaos, and trained in sarcasm.Now the royal kids are all grown up—and the world isn’t ready.Between family feuds, resurrected villains, and a five-year-old firebender with an attitude, the palace is basically a magical daycare with crowns. But when revenge hits home and the kids take charge, things get wild, weird, and a little too flammable.Royal duties? Nah.Sibling wars? Always.Saving the kingdom? Accidental.Welcome to the most dysfunctional, dangerously magical, and absolutely hilarious royal family you’ll ever meet.

In the third year of the Kaihuang era, as the Great Sui began to unfold between the fall of the Northern Dynasties and the rise of the glorious Tang Dynasty, Emperor Yang Jian created the House of Blades – an intelligence agency for strategies and conspiracies – in preparation to unify the world.

On a snowy night, a convoy of tribute from the Kingdom of Khotan was raided. Not one soul survived the attack. Feng Xiao, Second Commandant of the House of Blades, was ordered by the Emperor to investigate the matter in person.

On the distant border, a storm brewed as major forces gathered from all sides in Liugong Town. The strong rubbed shoulders with the strong; the skilled crossed paths with the skilled.

Here, the ever-successful Second Commandant Feng ran into a wall for the first time – all because of a feeble Taoist priest with ailing health.

Some things would never be known if no fights were ever picked. Only through their skirmishes did Feng Xiao realise that this sick bastard seemed to have way more aliases and personas than he himself ever did.

- Description from Novelupdates

After the Calamity War, the final and most devastating conflict to decide who would claim the Divine Throne, Kael Medici stood as the last survivor.He had led armies, fought with unmatched ferocity, and performed legendary feats. Yet in the end, his fate was no different from the rest. He perished like all the others, the final casualty of the Great War, his hand just shy of the throne he so desperately desired.But when he thought it was over… his eyes snapped open.He had returned to his youth, his memories intact.The path to divinity is drenched in blood, and the battle for supremacy is merciless. Yet Kael has already endured this once. This time, failure is not an option.With the memories of his past life, dominating talent and and a mysterious power awakening within him... The preparations to reach the Divine Throne were complete.

I was left paralyzed with only a month to live, but that “9-inch” part of me was still hard as a rock. Even the sickly beautiful schoolgirl couldn't resist my “pecker,” and to fulfill my dying wish, my sister even dressed up as a lady in black stockings to teach me how to “drill.” What's more outrageous, the hospital nurses wanted to make a little movie with me, lining up with the head nurse at the front...Just after coming out of the emergency room, I saw the system panel:Name: Ethan JonesGender: MaleLength: 9 inchesSkill: Hard as a Rock LV1Note: Peak human hardnessDying Wish: To caress auntie's sheer black stockingsTask Reward Points: 1000 pointsDespite my strength and stamina attributes being only at 1, and my agility at 0, only my “pecker” could lift the heavy blanket while doing squats. My face was full of question marks—what kind of bug is this system? Just because I like looking at auntie's legs, did it give me such a special skill?Now, I have no choice. I must complete tasks to earn points and add attribute points.However, the story actually begins 12 hours earlier...