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... s—no, the absolutely deranged—chanting of the newly formed Order of the Blessed Squish. She groggily pushed herself up and shuffled toward the window, rubbing her eyes. The second she peered outside, she regretted every life decision that had led her to this moment.

In the palace courtyard stood a massive statue of Squishy. Not an artist’s rendition, no. A horrifyingly accurate, gelatinous, marble-carved abomination that somehow blinked despite being made of solid stone.

In front ...

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