½ Prince-Volume 6 Chapter 6

Chapter 6: The Great NPC Revolt – translated by pinkpenknife and Asmodea

“Prince! All of you must not leave the training grounds, no matter what,” White Bird suddenly PM-ed me one day, completely bewildering me. There was a tone of uneasiness in her message that gave me a perturbed sense of foreboding.

“Why?” I PM-ed back immediately.

White Bird hesitated for a long moment, refusing to explain the reason. Something definitely must have happened. Anxious, I asked, “White Bird, hurry and tell me! What happened? If you still refuse to say anything, I’m going to dash out of the training grounds right now.”

Upon hearing that, White Bird roared, “Do not leave no matter what!”

What exactly happened that would make even the composed White Bird yell like this? Well, she does yell at me often, but… Since White Bird was still unwilling to tell the reason, I would have to force it out of her. “I am already at the exit of the training grounds. If you still do not tell me the reason, I’m going to leave. I’ll count down from three. Three, two—”

“Wait, I’ll tell!” White Bird finally yelled. “The Dictator of Life has sent a huge number of NPCs to Infinite City!”

The Dictator of Life has sent a huge number of NPCs to Infinite City? I almost could not believe what I had just heard. Didn’t Lolidragon say that the Dictator of Life was sealed in the Northern Continent? I immediately ran toward the control area, wanting to hear a proper answer from Lolidragon.

“Lolidragon!” I roared. “Infinite City is being surrounded by NPCs!”

“There is no need for you to shout that loudly; I already know about it.” Lolidragon’s reaction was calm beyond my expectations.

Lolidragon knew? “Didn’t you say that the Dictator of Life was sealed in the Northern Continent by the game company?” I hurriedly asked.

“Yes, it is true that the Dictator of Life cannot escape from the Northern Continent, but that does not mean that the NPCs he has created cannot escape,” Lolidragon said, her expression bleak.

“What shall we do then? Infinite City has already been surrounded.” Clenching my fists, I thought, There are still so many friends of mine outside; how can I stay in the training grounds at ease and watch them painfully battle against the NPCs? And then disappear forever?

“You are not allowed to go out!” Lolidragon said, emphasizing each word.

Stubbornly, I roared, “I need to get out! I can’t ignore my companions outside!”

“Prince, you can’t leave.” The others actually walked forward to persuade me. Could all of them possibly want to turn a blind eye to those who were outside?

I turned toward Wicked and asked him accusingly, “Do you know that Dark Emperor is together out there with your brother?”

“I do.” Wicked’s expression changed marginally as he clenched his fists tightly. “But the situation would not improve if we went out there. We’d only be getting ourselves killed for nothing.”

“I’m going out,” I said again seriously.

“No,” everyone replied together.

“Alright then, I’m leaving!” I patted my Black Dao and then walked toward the rainbow-colored glowing door without looking back.

Neurotic broke out in sweat and asked, “Are you guys sure that Prince understands everyday language?”

“Prince, are you missing the big picture again?” Lolidragon was so angry that she rushed up to me and grabbed my hand.

I turned back and gave Lolidragon a determined look. “No, but not forsaking my friends is one of the principles that I will never break.”

“What will happen if you die?” Lolidragon’s expression had relaxed slightly, but her mouth was still tight.

“I won’t!” Looks like Lolidragon is not persisting anymore. I smiled at her as I replied, but felt that it was not appropriate enough and immediately added, “I probably won’t…”

Three black lines ran down Lolidragon’s face. “Stop talking. The more you talk, the more I don’t feel like letting you go out.”

“Then I’m going. Don’t follow me you guys.” Waving without looking back, I walked through the rainbow-colored glowing door.

Just as I stepped out of the training grounds, I was greeted by a variety of expressive eyes, namely White Bird with a dumbfounded look, Ming Huang with an ‘I knew it’ look, Rose looking at me helplessly… But no matter who, everyone had a “What did you come out for?” expression.

Meeting everyone’s wide eyes for a long moment, I only raised my hand and greeted, “Long time no see.”

“What do you mean ‘long time no see’? Didn’t I just tell you not to come out here?” White Bird was so furious that her face had turned crimson. I suspect that she might be close to bursting a blood vessel.

Ming Huang, with an expression that made me want to punch him, said, “I told you so. If you don’t warn him, he wouldn’t necessarily come out, but if you warn him, then we can all just prepare to come to the training ground entrance to meet him. Also, everyone who had placed bets that Prince wouldn’t come, don’t forget to give me your wagers.”

Scratching my head, I asked, “What’s the situation now?”

“Look upwards!” Ming Huang said.

I looked upwards obediently, only now seeing an unusual sight. The sky was filled with a huge number of attractive angels flying all over the city. I couldn’t help but be moved and shouted, “Wow, angels!”

“Look left and right!” White Bird immediately told me.

I looked toward the left and right obediently, sudden realizing that there was something unusual about the people walking around. The person nearest to us had a porcupine hairstyle with large spikes of golden hair and was wearing a golden martial arts uniform…

“Never did I think…that in my lifetime I would be able to see a Super Saiyan,” I said calmly.

Suddenly, someone patted my right shoulder and a dark shadow fell over me. Furthermore, everyone was looking at the person behind me with fearful expressions… I suppose whatever is behind me is definitely not anything good. Gathering up my courage, I turned around…

“Excuse me, may I ask if you would help me untangle myself?” asked an octopus that had somehow inexplicably managed to knot its own legs into dead knots.

Struck speechless, I battled with the octopus’ eight soft legs for a few minutes before I finally managed to untie that terrifying knot. I wiped off the sweat on my forehead. “It’s undone.”

The octopus let out a very happy expression… Uh, at least according to my observation, it should be a happy expression. And it even used six ‘hands’ to bid farewell to me (two of its ‘hands’ were being used as legs). “Thank you, goodbye.”

I waved goodbye cheerfully. How surprising that, in the recent times when even humans are not very courteous, I could actually meet an octopus that is so polite!

I tilted my head slightly and thought for a long while. “Can someone tell me the situation now?”

How come this was a bit different from what I had imagined? Initially I thought that the sky would have an endless number of dragons breathing fire everywhere, that there would be terrifying squads of corpses crawling from underneath the ground, that AOE magic which could destroy the sky and earth would be released everywhere, that horrifying wails would be coming from all directions, and that bright lights would be shooting across Infinite City like fireworks, turning it into a purgatory on Earth… But, for some reason, what was happening around me could not be predicted by a normal viewpoint.

The angels were not carrying bows and arrows, holy swords, etc, but were instead carrying musical instruments and flying around playing music and singing. I was fine with this—it was only fair! Humans had human rights, angels had the right to sing too, but… Aren’t the angels in the legends supposed to play music so beautiful that humans could call them angelic tunes? Then why did I hear the sounds of broken gongs and trumpets, not to mention off-tone singing that could only be heard at a funeral, if you were ever ‘lucky’ enough to attend one?

What is happening nowadays? Even angels are tone-deaf! Or is this the legendary Sound Wave Attack?

Of course I did not mind the scene in the café, where the crowds were trying to hit on each other; everyone had the right to hit on others and to be hit on, but why? Why do I see Frieza trying to hit on Son Goku? Orochimaruflirting with Sasuke… These images are horrifying beyond words! I can’t be wrong; this must be a mind attack! Too terrifying…

Compared to the terrifying actions in front of me, the other things—Snow White happily talking about the latest anti-aging products with the evil witch, zombies and vampires drinking tomato juice on the dais of the Infinity City tavern, the Little Mermaid pulling out a sword stuck in a stone—really weren’t worth me getting shocked over.

“What a chaotic yet peaceful fairyland!” I couldn’t help but admire the extremely peaceful scene in front of me.

“It’s not very peaceful at all!” White Bird said helplessly.

“Celestial just came out and announced that if we attack the Northern Continent, these ‘peaceful creatures’ will immediately become evil monsters and completely destroy Infinite City,” Ming Huang said unhappily.

“How do they know that we’re preparing to attack the Northern Continent?” I asked gravely. Could there be a spy?

“…Is there anyone in Second Life that doesn’t know?” White Bird questioned stiffly.

I rubbed the back of my head helplessly. “Eh? That’s true…”

“Right now, I think it’s time to ask what we should do next,” White Bird said helplessly.

Before I could answer her question, I saw something that almost made my eyes pop out. Kenshin actually let a woman hold onto him while walking? I immediately pushed past all the obstacles in front of me and in an instant moved to Kenshin’s side. “Kenshin, when did you find a girlfriend?”

After seeing what Kenshin was holding to his chest, I nearly caught the “permanently dislodged jaw disease.” I could only ask, stammering, “The baby you’re holding can’t be yours, right?” When did you have a child? How come I seem to remember you didn’t have one a few days ago?

“You recognize me?” Kenshin asked me suddenly.

It can’t be that once you had a wife and a child, you forgot me completely? My feeling was like that of an abandoned mistress. It’s not as if I wouldn’t let you marry and raise a child; you don’t need to pretend to not recognize me, right?

I was so grieved that I went and hid myself at the side of the road to kick at small stones, and even squatted and began to draw circles. I squatted and squatted, but in front of me suddenly appeared a pair of familiar shoes. Wearing socks with sandals, aren’t those Kenshin’s standard shoes? I raised my head. Kenshin stood in front of me with an expression that was dark to the extreme. But…wasn’t my back facing Kenshin?

Feeling that I seemed to be missing something,I immediately stood up and looked behind me, but the Kenshin with his family was still standing where I’d left him. I looked back in front of me, but at my side was a Kenshin with a dark expression. Two Kenshins!

There is only one truth! Therefore…there should only be one real Kenshin, right? But to find out which one is the real one, I only need see where ‘that fellow’ is! Without much effort, I looked behind the Kenshin with the dark expression and found Cold Fox.

I immediately pointed and said, “Cold Fox is over here, so you’re the real Kenshin!”

Still recovering from my earlier shock, I patted my chest. “Luckily this bastard, Cold Fox, never takes a step from Kenshin’s side, or else I really don’t know how I would have figured it out!”

“…” Speechless, Kenshin only stared at me in response, his dark expression replaced by an exasperated one.

“But really, what is this situation? How come there’s an extra Kenshin?” I was completely perplexed.

At this time, the fake Kenshin suddenly walked toward the real Kenshin with a small smile and said, “I am here to pass on a message.”

“What message?” Kenshin replied coldly. Following his gaze, I realized that Kenshin wasn’t looking at the fake Kenshin, but rather at the woman at the fake Kenshin’s side. A kimono, hair tied back into a pony-tail… Is that Kaoru? I suddenly understood.

“So long as you join the Dictator’s ranks and come back to the Northern Continent with me, Kaoru will be yours,” the fake Kenshin said without caring in the slightest that he himself was currently hugging Kaoru.

I was stunned. Kenshin was stunned as well. Really, everyone was stunned. If you want to recruit, you shouldn’t recruit in front of the other person’s boss; the boss should never be totally disregarded!! Especially when the boss is me!

Slightly worried, I looked at Kenshin. Kenshin couldn’t possibly submit as soon as he sees Kaoru, right?

“You should head over there.” The fake Kenshin handed Kaoru the child, letting her know that she should go to the real Kenshin’s side.

Wearing an expression of pure happiness while holding the baby, Kaoru walked toward Kenshin step by step, and time seemed to pass in slow motion. As she approached, Kenshin had a conflicted expression that I had never seen before, and the fake Kenshin’s smile grew wider and wider.

Finally, Kaoru stood only one step away from Kenshin, those emotional eyes fixed on him, and the two seemed to be able to gaze at each other until the end of time. Even I couldn’t help but be touched…

“So? Why don’t you join our ranks?” These soft words from the fake Kenshin made my heart thump furiously. Could it be that Kenshin and I are going to become enemies?

“Please don’t leave me? Kenshin?” Kaoru piteously begged.

“Kaoru…” Kenshin caressed her face affectionately.

“Ah!” Kaoru suddenly screamed as an unseen force pulled her back to the fake Kenshin’s side.

Kenshin immediately began to chase after her, but Cold Fox abruptly grabbed him. Unable to go to Kaoru’s side, Kenshin angrily glared at Cold Fox. With a voice so icy that even I couldn’t help but shiver, he growled, “Let go of me!”

Ignoring Kenshin’s wintry tone, Cold Fox only calmly asked, “Are you sure that that is what you want?”

“Of course I want Kaoru!” Kenshin shouted angrily.

“Are you sure that that is your Kaoru?” Cold Fox questioned.

Kenshin was stunned. He looked at Kaoru uncertainly, and she began to sob softly. The scene really was tragically beautiful and touching. Even a Shakespearean romance would be hard-pressed to compare; and the famous Butterfly Lovers could only stand at the side…

“Bastard!” Ming Huang suddenly hit me violently and, in exasperation, yelled, “Others are feeling sentimental and yet you’re eating popcorn!”

I, feeling persecuted, met everyone’s furious eyes. “Is eating popcorn wrong? Eating Poca is too noisy; I was afraid I would affect the atmosphere so I switched to eating popcorn, a less noisy snack.”

“Eating anything is forbidden!” everyone roared in unison.

“Ay…” Kenshin looked back at me with an extremely helpless expression. I could only put my hands together in repentance.

When Kenshin turned around again to look at Kaoru, his complexion changed. He furrowed his brow deeper and deeper. Finally, he opened his mouth to ask, “Why hasn’t your expression changed at all? If even I couldn’t help but turn around to glare at Prince, how is it possible that Kaoru, who has a quicksilver temper, didn’t react?” Kenshin muttered, staring at the still painfully sobbing Kaoru.

“This pisses me off; this isn’t my wife!” an angry yell came from the skies, and then something fell to the earth with a thump.

Kenshin had almost thought it through, yet suddenly Cheng Yaojin interferes and even randomly throws around trash! Completely livid, I looked up at the sky to see who the bastard without any thought of environmental protection was.

“Oh no, Doll!” White Bird and Ming Huang suddenly shrieked in surprise, rushing over to the large piece of trash.

Doll? What does the large piece of trashhave to do with Doll? I was baffled, but when I saw what the large piece of trash was, my heart immediately constricted. That’s Doll! Piteously lying on the ground and lying spread eagled is Doll!

“Doll!” In an instant, I was at her side. Seeing her wide, soulless eyes, I was completely at a loss and could only keep calling her, yet I did not get the slightest reaction.

Who is it? Who’s the bastard that dropped Doll from the sky? I raised my head to look up at the sky. From between grinding teeth I spat, “Celestial!”

“Ming Huang! Strike him down!” I yelled angrily.

I had just finished yelling when ten lightning bolts struck out. Celestial was lightly moving like a gust of wind, easily dodging those lightning bolts. I was so furious, I was almost crazy, bitterly wishing that I could be like the angels in the sky and sprout wings so that I could tear Celestial into pieces.

Celestial only giggled. “Why are you angry? It’s not like that is my wife.”

“What did you say?” I was completely perplexed by his words.

“This isn’t the real Doll, it’s a fake!” White Bird said, startled. “This is a dead NPC, not a player.”

“Fake?” I hurriedly squatted down to investigate. She was right; this Doll’s eyes were wide open and completely lifeless. If she were the real Doll, she should have long since become a white light and flown away, yet she continued to lie there… While I was still reasoning it out, she slowly became transparent, just like how a typical NPC monster would die; it probably wouldn’t be long before she disappeared completely!

Looks like this really isn’t Doll. I sighed in relief, but I couldn’t help but start to scold Celestial, “You bastard, are you trying to scare me to death? Why would you create an NPC like Doll for no reason? And even randomly throw it around!”

Celestial’s mouth tightened. “The Dictator was the one who made this for me; it’s not like I was the one who made it.”

Coldly, I mocked, “I am eighty percent certain that the reason the Dictator of Life made Doll for you is so that you can practice your ‘Honey, Honey Continuous Name Calling Technique’ on it instead of him!”

“How did you know?” Celestial asked suspiciously.

That’s really the truth? “Guessed…”

“She and Doll are still different?” Kenshin suddenly raised his head and asked Celestial.

Hearing this question, Celestial was actually furious to the point of yelling and screaming. “Different is different! When I licked her, she wouldn’t slap me like my wife; when I gave her something to eat, she would actually say thank you, and when she finished eating one pack of pastries, she would say she’s full. How is that my wife? Absolutely not!”

That definitely is not Doll…

“I don’t want this kind of fake!” Celestial was so angry that he came down and kicked the fake Doll to the side.

“Me too,” Kenshin suddenly said serenely. “I also don’t want a fake. Kaoru…exists in my memories.” He didn’t look at the fake Kaoru again. Instead, he turned around to leave and said, “Let’s go get tea, Fox.”

Cold Fox only raised his eyebrows, and followed Kenshin without a word.

“How cool!” I praised. Kenshin really is Kenshin. I couldn’t help but gleefully look at the fake Kenshin and Kaoru. The two of them didn’t look surprised. They walked away expressionlessly, becoming part of the surrounding messy scene.

“I want to see my wife. Can you take me to her?” Standing at my side, Celestial actually had a pleading expression on his androgynous face, giving me goosebumps all over my skin.

“No!” I refused instantly.

“Why?” Celestial was so furious that he was spinning in circles in his spot, continuing to rant without stopping. “I want to see my wife. I want to see my wife. Let me see her!”

“You’re really stubborn. You’ve really only known Doll for not even a few hours, so how come you keep bothering her without letting go?”Even falling in love at first sight shouldn’t be like this, right?

“Because when I woke up, the first thing I saw was my wife,” Celestial answered with an idiotic smile.

“Woke up?” I asked suspiciously. It can’t be…

“Yes. When I first met you two, I was actually half dreaming, half awake,” Celestial said, tilting his head slightly. He looked a bit curious, yet amused. “Afterward, when I brought my wife home, she slapped me and finally woke me up.”

Doll… Did you know that your slaps made a person like an extremely sticky piece of gum glue himself to you? I really was helpless three times over.

“Can you let me see my wife—?” Celestial had barely finished speaking when his eyes suddenly began to shine. He looked behind me and before I knew it, he had pushed me and sent me flying to the side. I glanced back just in time to see an emotional Celestial running toward Doll.

Slap! Slap!

I opened my mouth and, disbelieving, asked, “…Doll, why did you slap him?”

Doll had a face of complete innocence. As if she had been wronged, she said, “Doesn’t he like it when I slap him? That’s why I did it…”

I don’t think that was what he meant, right? I could see that Celestial’s tears were on the verge of leaking out. The situation was really unusual; Celestial was half kneeling and half sobbing, and the responsible party, Doll, actually had an expression of innocence. Perhaps the one that needs protection isn’t Doll, but rather Celestial, who will need to apply for protection against domestic violence.

“Your Highness, what exactly is the situation now?” Gui furrowed his brows, looking at the strange scenes surrounding us.

I waved my hand. “I don’t know; ask that bastard!” I pointed at the abused NPC, Celestial, who was currently pulling at Doll’s skirt.

“Prince-gēgē is asking you a question. Hurry and answer him,” Doll ordered, actually taking up a fierce role and facing Celestial with her fists on her hips.

“Oh.” Celestial obediently pulled himself up and answered. “These are all NPCs sent by the Dictator. Once the Dictator knew that you wanted to attack the Northern Continent, he decided to strike first and send these NPCs to watch you. If you guys take any action, these NPCs will attack you.”

This will be troublesome. Under this sort of monitor, how are we going to carry out making a ship to attack the Northern Continent?

“All of these are sentient NPCs?” Gui asked, face grim.

Celestial wore an expression that seemed to say “how could that be possible?” and waved his hand, saying, “It’s not like that. How could there be so many self-aware NPCs? Even the Dictator has been having trouble finding more comrades! These are only normal NPCs.”

“No wonder! No wonder the Dictator of Life has put up with you until now and hasn’t gotten rid of you yet. He couldn’t find other comrades, so he had no choice,” I muttered to myself. If it wasn’t like that, then someone like Celestial, who had scarce accomplishments yet excessive losses and even spilled everything to the enemy, would have been hacked back to rebirth one hundred times by the Dictator of Life.

Since Celestial was currently answering a hundred percent of my questions, I decided to clear up all of my quandaries. “Celestial, is the Dictator of Life a warrior or a mage?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen the Dictator attack personally.” Celestial tilted his head, considering the question for a moment before he said, “Probably a mage. He often throws me around in mid air.”

“Throws you around? Is his temper really bad?” I furrowed my brow.

“No, the Dictator’s temper is very good,” said Celestial. “Not like the others; I only say a few words and they look as if they want to kill me.”

“Others?” I couldn’t help but ask suspiciously. This is the first time I’ve heard of any others.

Celestial scratched his head. “Mm. Called something like the Four Heavenly Kings. I think they’re called something like Ocean’s Heart, Flowing Wind, Scorching Flame… Uh… What was the last one called?”

“Clay Child.”

Celestial looked as though he had been struck by lightning. “Yes, yes, Clay Child.”

“Geez, even though I’m the one you’re on best terms with, why am I the only one you can’t remember?” a child’s voice complained. I watched as a plump child, who was wearing a yellow undergarment covering his chest and abdomen, slowly descended from the sky while standing on a golden skateboard.

“Clay Child, why have you come?” Celestial happily grabbed Clay Child’s small hand and sprinted to Doll’s side. Holding Clay Child up in front of Doll, he said, “Look, this is my wife. Isn’t she cute!”

Clay Child had an obviously exasperated expression. “She is very cute.”

“You’re also very cute.” Doll couldn’t help but grab Clay Child from Celestial’s grasp and hold him to her chest to play with him. Clay Child actually didn’t seem to mind, apparently already long since used to it. He let Doll pinch his cheeks and throw him up and down.

“But, have you completely forgotten the Dictator’s orders?” Clay Child couldn’t help but remind Celestial.

Stupefied, Celestial asked, “The Dictator? What did he ask of me?”

Clay Child fell from Doll’s hands and landed flat on his back. With some difficulty, he pulled himself back onto his feet and, still exasperated, said, “No wonder the other Heavenly Kings don’t like you. If it weren’t for the Dictator not letting us kill each other, I think you would have long since been murdered by the others.”

“Exactly what did the Dictator ask of me?” Celestial questioned with a face full of innocence.

“Didn’t the Dictator get fed up with you always calling after your wife, so he told you to join up with me, capture your wife, and take her back to the Northern Continent?” Clay Child said unhappily. “Do you know how long I waited for you? If I hadn’t guessed that you probably came directly to the Central Continent, I would probably still be waiting for you in the Northern Continent.”

Capture Doll! I had originally been listening to Celestial and Clay Child talk, laughing so hard that I almost couldn’t breathe, but my smile immediately froze on my face. In a flash, I grabbed Doll’s hands and ran to the training ground entrance. I don’t know why, but I have a feeling that if I don’t hurry and get in, Doll will disappear forever.

“You want to run? Earth Wall!” Clay Child’s young, child-like voice said. A towering wall instantly appeared from the ground before me. I almost couldn’t stop myself from running into it.

“Block them; I’ll get Doll inside the training ground first!” I roared at my comrades behind me, but in actuality they had already started moving and everyone was beginning to attack Clay Child and Celestial.

I’ll come back as soon as possible. Seeing my comrades in the middle of battle, I put all my efforts into carrying Doll and sprinting, silently praying in my heart: Absolutely don’t let anything happen to anyone!

“Gah! I tripped,” I loudly yelled my predicament as I stumbled, which was then followed by a very loud thud.

I painfully groaned before slowly pulling myself back up, but just when I wanted to continue running, I realized that Doll, who had been in my hands, had disappeared. I was so startled that I turned around frantically to look for her, only to stop when I heard Celestial start to berate me.

“What the hell are you doing?! You almost tossed my wife away! If you injured her, I’ll make you pay!”

I raised my head and saw Celestial carrying Doll while floating in the air. Crap! Celestial won’t take Doll back just like this, will he?

“That didn’t take any effort at all….” Clay Child wore an expression of complete helplessness and even shook his head while looking at me. “I really don’t know why the Dictator considers a brute like you as his main enemy, even going so far as to say that we can’t kill you because he wants to deal with you personally.”

Clay Child stepped on his skateboard and glided to Celestial’s side. “Let’s go. It’s time to return to the Northern Continent.”

“I don’t want to! I don’t want to go to the Northern Continent!” Doll was so terrified that her face had become deathly pale.

Celestial revealed an injured expression. “Why? Wife, you don’t want to go back with me?”

“I don’t want to go to the Northern Continent! I want to be with everyone,” Doll’s tears were almost brimming over, and she pleaded piteously. “Celestial, how about you stay here?”

Celestial even murmured “oh,” and then said, “Okay, if my wife doesn’t want to go to the Northern Continent, then I’ll stay here instead.”

For the second time, Clay Child fell from his skateboard, this time falling from a height of over ten meters; it was so painful that he wailed for a good while before he had the strength to say, “You—Don’t stir up trouble! Celestial, do you plan on betraying the Dictator?”

“What do you mean, betray the Dictator? I only want to stay with my wife.” Celestial had a completely uncomprehending expression.

Talking with this bastard is useless! I could “see” this same thought on everyone’s faces.

Clay Child held his forehead for a long moment before he said helplessly, “Alright, then you can stay here for now since there are so many NPCs here. They should be enough to prevent you from being killed by humans. I’ll go back and ask the Dictator before deciding what to do.

“Ah, ah, if the other three Heavenly Kings hear about this, they’ll definitely dislike you even more,” Clay Child complained again as he stepped onto his skateboard and glided toward the north.

We looked up at the departing Clay Child, looked right and left at the messy scenes around us, and then helplessly heard the “Pa! Pa!” of another two slaps. What exactly do we do now?

“So now scores of NPCs and even Celestial are staying here. What should we do with our plan?” My mind was in complete chaos, so I could only throw the problem to the ones who had caught up to me, the ones who did my thinking for me.

Lolidragon knitted her brows together. “Celestial… He couldn’t have been sent to watch Infinite City’s movements, could he?”

“Shouldn’t be. He was just doggedly trying to take Doll to the Den of Wandering Nymphs to play,” I said honestly.

“If the Dictator of Life were stupid enough to send that bastard to spy, then he should be called the Piglet of Life, not the Dictator of Life,” Ming Huang mocked unsympathetically.

“Still, this means that we need to change our strategy.” Lolidragon rubbed her temples. “What should we do?”

Gui said coldly, “Why do we need to change our strategy? Fighting on the Northern Continent and fighting on the Central Continent are the same. Anyway, this battle’s main purpose is to distract the Dictator of Life, giving the Execution Squad the opportunity to reach the Dictator.”

“Still, we need to find an alternative first,” Gui said gravely as he closed his eyes. “If Prince and the others don’t appear in our fighting force, then the Dictator of Life will definitely discover our plan.”

“Lolidragon, can you tell your programmers to develop a disguise skill for us to use? This kind of small thing should be doable, right?” Gui questioned Lolidragon.

“It should be,” Lolidragon said after thinking about it for a moment.

“Then this should work…” Gui furrowed his brows. “Although, I’ve been having some suspicions.”

“Suspicions about what?” I asked curiously.

Gui hesitated for a moment before saying, “I think that the Dictator of Life knows our every move. He sent Kaoru to entice Kenshin to join his side, yet has not made any attempts toward Sunshine. Just from this, we can tell that he most likely knows about Sunshine and Fairsky’s relationship.”

“But they got together before the game company sealed away the Dictator of Life, so it isn’t unusual that the Dictator of Life would know about that, right?” Lolidragon protested in disagreement.

“No, I think that even now, he knows our every move,” Gui said calmly. “When I think about this carefully, the Dictator of Life’s control over Second Life is very extensive. He may have over a hundred methods to know our movements such as, for example, making an NPC as small as or even smaller than a mosquito to eavesdrop on our conversations.”

“Then isn’t that very bad? Doesn’t that mean that he may have long since known about our plan to secretly go to the Northern Continent?” I gulped. Even killing the Dictator of Life when he’s not prepared has a low enough success rate, but now that he knows…? Doesn’t this mean that we’ll go but never come back?

“Mm. So that’s why I don’t understand: Why doesn’t he kill us? Apart from the assassins from before, he hasn’t sent anyone else to kill us. Before, I always thought that we really had no way to match him. The Dictator of Life probably has at least over a hundred methods he can use to get rid of us.” Gui looked as if his brain might burst from exertion. “It doesn’t make sense. It really doesn’t make sense.”

“Isn’t his purpose to force all humans out of Second Life?” Gui scratched his head and then muttered to himself, “He only needs to send out a bunch of NPCs with the HD program to massacre us, so why is he still staying his hand? Why does he only threaten us?”

Seeing Gui’s mystification, I distinctly felt that having too much intelligence was not necessarily good: it’s very likely to make you think too much and make your brain explode. I have it so much better! I completely did not understand what part of the Dictator’s actions did not make sense.

He’s waiting for you.

A familiar voice suddenly entered my ear. Isn’t that Celestial’s voice? But isn’t Celestial with Doll, playing around outside the city? And it looks like no one else is reacting to these words.

The Dictator of Life has always been waiting for you, Prince. Go. Go to the Northern Continent to find him! If you’re late, then you might not make it in time.

“Won’t make it in time for what?” I said, startled, but I only received suspicious looks that everyone cast my way.

Hurry! He’s waiting for you.

“Waiting for me? Why?” I asked suspiciously. However, Celestial did not answer me again.

“Prince?” Gui hesitantly asked as he looked at me.

Uncomprehendingly, I turned around. What exactly was that? Why are things only getting more and more complicated? Why is the Dictator of Life waiting for me? Is he waiting for me to drink tea with him?

Footnotes

“Three black lines ran down Lolidragon’s face.”: A way to represent mortification in manga. (For more information, see)

“Super Saiyan”: A reference to the Dragonball manga/anime. Once characters turn Super Saiyan, they become super-powered up and their hair turns golden.

“Frieza trying to hit on SonGoku”: A reference to the Dragonball Z manga/anime. Frieza and Goku are enemies.

“Orochimaru flirting with Sasuke…”: A reference to the Naruto manga/anime. Orochimaru is one of the antagonists.

“Butterfly Lovers”: A Chinese legend of a tragic love story between Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai. This story is often regarded as the Chinese equivalent of Romeo and Juliet.

“Cheng Yaojin”: A general of the Tang Dynasty, but in folk stories, he started out as a peasant leader fighting for justice who was forced to become a bandit. He is said to be a reckless and straightforward person, who would charge at enemies suddenly and unexpectedly. The Chinese saying “半路杀出个程咬金” literally means “Halfway through the road, Cheng Yaojin attacks unexpectedly,” though its use here means “a person who appears unexpectedly.”

“…He should be called the Piglet of Life, not the Dictator of Life.”: This is a pun where the characters for “Dictator” in “the Dictator of Life” are replaced with characters that are pronounced almost the same in Chinese as “Dictator” but mean something very different. 主宰 (zhǔzǎi), Dictator, was replaced with 豬仔 (zhǔzǎi), which means young pig.