Eighteen's Bed-Chapter 25.1

The rain, falling like hail, hammered the umbrella. The sound of the barber shop sign rotating also hummed. The umbrella in my left hand faced the sky, while the one in my right hand dragged, tapping the ground.

A green cloth roof, with the words 'supermarket' and 'cigarettes' written on it.

And in between, there was Go Yohan.

Go Yohan showed me the palm of his hand, quickly folding each finger one by one and then opening them in reverse order. And at the tip of his fingers hung a cigarette butt, familiar yet unfamiliar. I stopped breathing right then.

The time around us, the space, and the faint emotions started filling our world, and many things began to change. By the way, Go Yohan had lost his faith and strayed from the righteous path.

Annoying.

Anyway, Go Yohan only does things that catch my attention. Whatever it may be.

"Did you come?"

His bright-colored eyes gleamed sharply. No matter how many times I saw them, they always looked fierce. On that fierce face, the long eyelashes that didn’t quite match adorned it, making the sharpness both dangerous and beautifully extravagant. Even the small gap between the whites of his eyes below. I felt an itch from the top of my head and pretended to close my umbrella, avoiding his gaze. Go Yohan was always dangerous.

“Because you were late, I got completely soaked.”

As I ignored him, not looking at him, Go Yohan tapped my cheek with the hand that wasn’t holding the cigarette. The scent of soap hit me from behind, making my head spin. Is he crazy?

"I know."

"Jun, don't just say you know. I’m soaked."

Go Yohan extended his arms forward. The white shirt, a little too big, revealed his sharp shoulders more clearly as water droplets flowed down it. What was with the grin when he looked like a drowned rat? I looked at Go Yohan’s hand, reflecting light from the water.

I saw the cigarette.

Go Yohan held the cigarette in a strange way, like holding chopsticks differently. Watching the cigarette nestled between Go Yohan’s fifth and fourth fingers, I quietly swallowed.

"I told you to take an umbrella in the morning. It was going to rain."

“Jun, what are you looking at?”

Go Yohan smiled slyly at my words. Then, intentionally and arrogantly, he placed the cigarette between his fifth and fourth fingers into his mouth. The twisted wrist was quite uncomfortable to look at. This time, I only glanced at his collarbone, avoiding the cigarette butt.

“I was just looking ahead.”

Go Yohan took a deep drag, and as he exhaled, he sneered and answered the warning I had given, which he had ignored.

"If I leave it like this, you’ll come to pick me up."

"Please stop calling me. I’m busy."

"Of course, you’re busy. What kind of exam schedule is that for your classes?"

"Are you talking about me? Don’t you have things to do too? Your major is busy too."

"They said I should enjoy the privileges of being a freshman."

Go Yohan closed his eyes and deeply inhaled the smoke, then opened one eye. His brows rose high before settling back down. His sharp eyes bent like a crescent moon in the night. “Fool.” That was his response.

"...What a gutsy guy."

I muttered, tapping the floor with the umbrella I hadn’t opened.

Due to his unique way of smoking, every time Go Yohan inhaled, his fingers would cover his face. His neatly trimmed nails scratched his forehead hidden between his bangs. He then turned his head outward, subtly lowering his hand, and exhaled a long stream of smoke. The gray smoke was swallowed by the heavy rain.

"Jun."

"…"

"Jun."

Go Yohan called my name repeatedly, as if demanding a response. I just looked at him. Without the cigarette, Go Yohan awkwardly placed his lips between his fourth finger and middle finger. The cigarette filter dangled precariously beneath his chin, almost burnt out. He wasn’t smoking it, yet I struggled to breathe, holding my face in disgust from the overwhelming stench of cigarette smoke.

“You have no sense.”

Go Yohan smiled lowly and continued speaking.

"You’re doing everything in plain sight. You should lead me to places where I’m supposed to go."

The Lord will show me the way in detail. Following the exact tone from the Bible, Go Yohan squinted and grinned. Guess it’s funny. I didn’t bother to change the frown on my face.

“Why would someone who wants to go to heaven smoke?”

"Well, if smoking prevents you from going to heaven, then half the world is going to hell."

"...You never used to smoke. You."

My words, full of complaints, slipped out without me thinking. I didn’t particularly want to correct myself. Was it because I knew Go Yohan knew that I could be honest in front of him, or was it just because it was Go Yohan? I often became uncharacteristically blunt.

And whenever I showed this attitude, Go Yohan would look at me with a slightly satisfied gaze. He knew I only let my guard down in front of him. Annoyingly so.

"Right."

But why? I deliberately gave a loud cough to signal Go Yohan. He took a step back but didn't turn off the light.

"People, you see, they change their beliefs depending on what they trust. Isn't that so?"

"What?"

Go Yohan inserted the filter back into his mouth and took a deep drag. The cigarette butt hanging from his pinky finger looked dangerously close to burning out. He inhaled the smoke, looked down, and stared intensely at something. I naturally followed his gaze and bent my head. Damn. I hastily turned my body slightly to the side.

A laugh that made no sound escaped between Go Yohan's lips along with a wisp of grey smoke.

"…Hey."

"What can I do if you're hooked on a trash who smokes? I have to be generous."

"What, smoking? Me?"

"Isn't it?"

"Not at all."

"Really? Why?"

Go Yohan genuinely curious, raised his fingers back to his mouth. It was my turn to be taken aback. It was obvious, wasn't it? I uncomfortably looked at Go Yohan, then blinked my eyes and hesitantly opened my mouth under his pressing gaze.

"It's bad for your health…"

"Wow, Jun."

Ju-na. His lips around the filter mispronounced the words.

"Are you really that wholesome?"

Go Yohan chewed on the filter. His lips curled up in what seemed like a sneer. No, given the look in his eyes, it was definitely a sneer. Ha-ha. After exhaling a thin stream of smoke, Go Yohan continued.

"Jun must really love me a lot. Worrying about every little thing like that."

"That's…"

Wouldn't I stop it? I've decided never to do such things for life. For that damned guy.

I stopped mid-sentence and roughly scratched my head. For that damned bastard, I've spread my legs, and taken that absurdly large dick. Son of a bitch. This guy should get fucked too, to know what it feels like to be on the verge of dying.

"Not to that extent."

When I spat out a shameless lie out of spite, Go Yohan roughly removed the filter from his mouth. The lips holding the filter stretched slightly, revealing the raw flesh inside. His eyes, like a snake lurking in the mud waiting for a moment, grew colder and colder. This time, he placed his dry lips between his middle and index fingers. The heavy black dot between his bright eyes stared piercingly at me.

"Not to that extent?"

"…Yeah."

"Oh- really?"

His tone sounded playful, but it was uncomfortable to hear. There was a sharp edge in his words. The humidity born from the pouring rain seeped into my clothes, soaking me through. The persistent black dot still watched me intently. Go Yohan slowly tilted his neck back while keeping his fingers close to his lips.

"…Hey."

Go Yohan extended his hand, pressing his immobile middle and index fingers against my lower lip. Hey. As he said that, Go Yohan's fingers intrusively entered my mouth. Crazy-. I glared at Go Yohan and weakly bit his fingers. His fingers tasted of alcohol. That way, Go Yohan clumsily spread my lips with his fingers.

"Ha-i-ya."

I tried to bite Go Yohan's fingers again, meaning to tell him to fuck off, but Go Yohan leisurely pulled his hand away. Just the tips of his fingers remained on my lips. He really knows how to manipulate his body. Or perhaps my love for Go Yohan was greater than my desire to hurt him.

Anyway, stupid Kang Jun. In the end, in front of an old supermarket, Go Yohan had me embarrassingly open my lips.

With his left hand holding my chin, Go Yohan pressed hard against my cheek with his fingers. His mouth was still grinning mischievously, but his pupils were dark and foggy. Staring at me with those black eyes, he said.

"Jun."

"Ah."

"Kidding."

Then he put the filter he had been chewing into my mouth. The only gentle thing was that he didn’t actually put it in my mouth, but rather, placed it on my lips and then closed my mouth for me. And then Go Yohan removed his hand from my lips. I coughed quietly at the rough scent that lingered.

Go Yohan seemed pleased with my small cough. He smiled very contentedly.

"Seriously, you’re in trouble."

Then he put his lips back between his middle and index fingers. Before he opened his mouth wide, he looked at me and said,

"Remember this. Apart from that, I like these kinds of pranks."

What's that supposed to mean.

No, never mind. I didn't need to ask. Go Yohan was looking down at me while sticking out his tongue. His red tongue lasciviously licked the thin flesh connecting his middle and index fingers. What's he doing? Without hesitating, Go Yohan chased me with his eyes while pushing the licked flesh into his mouth.

Seeing Go Yohan sucking vigorously on the thin flesh connecting his fingers, I instantly knew.

This crazy guy…. Even as my body writhed in discomfort from the constant influx of smoke, I couldn't close my eyes, captivated by Go Yohan's provocative gaze. His seductive eyes swept over my neck area, making me want to cover my ears from the filthy sound. The sound of dry lips, saliva, and fingers mixing.

At the same time, my core tingled.

"…"

I straightened my bent body, coughing as if hiccuping, to hide my trembling body excitedly, and lifted my head high, spitting the cigarette on the ground.

The half-burned cigarette butt rolled on the ground and sank into the muddy water. Go Yohan watched the dying cigarette butt and smiled, elongating his eyes and then detaching his lips with a 'pop' sound. A transparent thread stretched long between his middle and index fingers. I clenched and then unclenched my hand hidden in my sleeve. A voice compressed and pressed against the base of his throat came out in front of me.

"I wish you'd suck on this, just like that."

"I won't be licking between your fingers anytime soon."

That's a lie. I actually think I'll definitely end up doing it someday. Kang Jun subtly admitted it. I’d take those long fingers in my mouth, chew on them, suck them, all sorts of things. But since Go Yohan was detestable and annoying, I just wouldn’t admit it.

"Fingers, Jun? Why would you lick fingers when you have nothing else to do?"

"Then why did you do it?"

"It was a preview. What you should be doing next isn't licking fingers."

Go Yohan's wet hand slowly moved down. His fingers touched the jeans, which looked darker than usual because they were wet. His fingers paused in midair, drawing a gentle circle. No way. My mind became hazy. It couldn't be. Could it?

And Go Yohan brutally shattered my expectations as his fingers brushed up the protruding part of the zipper while he shockingly stated,

"You're supposed to suck here."

"Are you insane?"

"Insane? Isn't it said that you're half mad when you're in love?"

Yeah, but why are you stating it so blatantly?

"I love you quite a lot."

His sullen face pouted his lower lip. Crazy, is he trying to be cute? I shook my head firmly.

"Don't change the subject. And definitely, it’s going to rip my mouth open. Your... fuck."

"Ah, was that the problem? I thought otherwise. Honestly, I'm not that big."

"Not big? Are you crazy? Are you joking?"

"Try a little harder before you give up. Don't you have any tenacity?"

Go Yohan looked down at me with a look of disdain. This guy, really. I clenched my fist as it filled with heat.

As Go Yohan took off his school uniform, the presence in his lower body became even more pronounced. Even in slightly loose jeans, the area around the zipper always seemed mysteriously bulky. That’s why there was always a bulge there. I could even see it bulge more prominently and then disappear as he shifted his position. At this rate, the intimidation was enough to turn my head pale.

It would be something if it were cut in half here. I was fully willing to do that much. As I was thinking this, Go Yohan, as if reading my thoughts, said in a serious tone,

"You're being too harsh. Did I choose to be born this way? And it’s not like I can reduce its size. I’ve never heard of surgery to reduce a dick in my life."

"Please, don’t use explicit words in a public place."

"Don't be scared. There's nobody on the street anyway."

"What about the shop owner?"

"Baldy? He’s sitting at the counter reading porn."

"Hey, that man is older than your father."

"Given the level of what he’s reading, I guess I can speak informally?"

Go Yohan playfully poked my left forehead with his long fingers. Because of that, my slightly damp and slightly curly hair shook. He twisted his fingers in his hair and puffed his thin cheeks, then blew out the air. A trembling sound came from his lips as his puffed cheeks deflated.

"Just adapt. Think of it as eating a baguette from behind. Whether it’s through the upper or lower mouth, it's all the same going into the body."

"..."

Is this really madness?

How should I respond to this logic? I squinted and even moved my eyebrows, but no response came to mind. It seems the end of an argument is when you make the other person clueless about what to say. That’s exactly what Go Yohan did.

"Then either increase the size or don’t. Food doesn’t suddenly increase in size."

"That’s a tough request."

While licking his lips and clicking his tongue, Go Yohan placed his fingers on the back of my hand holding the umbrella. Then he slowly teased and pushed his fingers between mine. Damn it. His fingers, wet from the rain, twisted.

As I stiffly straightened my fingers, Go Yohan caught the tilting umbrella losing its support. Then smoothly, he opened the umbrella. The thin wires snapped into place, making a refreshing sound. Raindrops that were falling got repelled by the suddenly opened umbrella and splattered on the ground. Watching this, Go Yohan gave a rather satisfied smile.

"See, even an umbrella stands when you press it. How can you stop what’s a natural principle? Jun."

What kind of logic is this? As I was flustered, Go Yohan wrinkled his nose and laughed.

"Why are you looking at me like that? Am I that handsome?"

Exactly. There are days when Go Yohan’s gloomy face stands out more. It was particularly so on rainy days. I declare conscientiously. Go Yohan looks especially handsome on rainy days. Especially when he is wet, he exudes a unique vibe. His face looks more impoverished than affluent, but sometimes that poor vibe is captivating.

No. My mouth froze as if it couldn’t move. After several attempts where my lips turned in vain, I finally blurted out the words that had been sleeping deep within.

"Yeah."

And my pride came out with it.

"It’s usually okay, but today it’s a bit too much."

What am I saying? I bit my lips hard. What I just said must have sounded terrible. Go Yohan laughed heartily, lifting his chin with his palm.

"Ah, it was just right usually?"

"Just, it was okay."

"Just, it was okay?"

He laughed several times in quick succession.

Suddenly, the world I was looking at was covered by a black umbrella. The diagonally tilted umbrella slowly came down, blocking my view. It was Go Yohan’s doing.

I looked at Go Yohan with eyes full of wonder, but it was already too late. Go Yohan lowered his eyelashes and brought his face close to mine.

But it's strange of me, too. I could have avoided it.

"Jun."