I Became the Academy's Kibitz Villain-Chapter 397: Good Things Should Be Shared (2)

“Excuse me, Baek Seol-hee. Do you even realize what you’ve done?”

“Why are you suddenly being so formal? Is someone here? There’s no one but Yumir.”

Do Ji-hwan wanted to emphasize the distance between them by using formal speech, but Baek Seol-hee wasn’t fazed at all.

“Why are you narrating that like it’s a story?”

Both Baek Seol-hee, who had just caused a scene before returning to the room, and Yumir, who was giggling and quietly watching beside her, were equally baffling.

“Yumir, I’ll deal with you later. So, how does it feel after causing a commotion?”

“It feels great. Like a blocked artery has been cleared.”

“Of course it does. You’ve just blown up all the problems you’ve been agonizing over right in front of everyone.”

It was as if Baek Seol-hee had detonated the uncomfortable tumor growing in a corner of her mind for all to see.

Baek Seol-hee might feel relieved, but now Do Ji-hwan wasn’t a free man anymore.

“From now on, it’s going to be very difficult for you to continue acting as Do Ji-hwan.”

“Why are you talking like I have some hidden identity, Mr. Do Ji-hwan?”

“What are you going to do if I say, ‘Screw this, I’m quitting as Do Ji-hwan’?”

“That would be a problem.”

Baek Seol-hee approached and tightly grabbed both my arms.

“I’ve got a good plan.”

“How about sharing that plan with me beforehand?”

“I already did. You even gave me the idea.”

“I did?”

“Yes. It might’ve been an offhand comment from you, but it’s the best plan for both of us.”

Baek Seol-hee pushed me onto the bed with her strength, and I complied, sitting at the edge of the bed.

“Let’s hear it. What’s the plan? If it’s better than mine, I’ll adopt it. Of course, as Do Ji-hwan, my judgment comes second.”

“This plan benefits others besides Do Ji-hwan, so don’t worry. It’ll actually make things easier for you. From now on, all national powers will look after you.”

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Baek Seol-hee spread her arms and gestured to the room.

“From now on, the person known as Do Ji-hwan will not be allowed to leave Baek Seol-hee’s room. Ta-da!”

“…Oh?”

I could see the picture Baek Seol-hee was painting.

A specific plan, supposedly based on something I’d mentioned in passing, was coming together.

“You’re going to kidnap and detain me somewhere? Officially?”

“Correct. If done secretly, it’s a crime. But doing it officially means no one can say anything.”

“At least not to your face.”

Behind the scenes, unofficial merchandise and magazine covers sold by the Hero Alliance were being burned, among other incidents.

Seventy percent of it was malicious attempts to exploit the Baek Seol-hee scandal and break her fans’ morale. The other thirty percent came from those thinking, ‘Our pure Baek Seol-hee has been tainted!’

They thought of themselves as the Seven Dwarves protecting Snow White. Yet, in reality, they prioritized Baek Seol-hee so much that they created chaos around her.

Objectively and long-term, they weren’t helping Baek Seol-hee. However, watching them curse and hate her from their backup accounts was undoubtedly unpleasant for her.

“Well, I don’t care if people curse at me behind my back. If they’re true fans, they’ll wish me happiness.”

“By slapping meat around?”

“Why would anyone slap meat?”

“….”

It was an inside joke known to only a few, and it failed miserably in this context.

“Anyway, I don’t care what they say. If they send assassins after Do Ji-hwan or curse a child into a miscarriage, I’ll retaliate thoroughly.”

“In that case, wouldn’t Goblin step in? Or more accurately, the Secret Society?”

Yumir chimed in slyly.

“Of course, Do Ji-hwan has nothing to do with the Secret Society. But people trying to demonize an S-class hero like Baek Seol-hee will surely be handled by the Society, just like with Platinum Sun.”

“True. What do you think, Do Ji-hwan? Would the Society offer such services?”

“Rather than a service, it’s something the Society would do by default, going out of their way to deal with trolls. They’re probably doing it right now.”

People were already being visited secretly, disguised as delivery drivers, or having their social media hacked and receiving threats.

While the internet was being moderated in real time, it was now time to start managing real-world traffic.

“If your wife permits, Ji-hwan, let’s make it official. You’ll be a full-time househusband living with Baek Seol-hee, and no one will enter her house. Not on Sejong Island.”

“And outside?”

“We could get a pension in Ulleungdo or Jeju Island, stay at my house in Busan, or find a quiet house in Seoul.”

“If you mean Banpo Zai, that’s a house I bought with my own money.”

It was something I purchased for satisfaction, something I couldn’t achieve in reality.

“My own money, my own house.”

“I won’t make you sell it. I’ll also look for a quiet house in Seoul if you want to live there. Or a highly secure apartment.”

“Either way, I’ll be stuck inside, unable to go out, whether in Seoul or Busan, right?”

“But I’ll be there.”

Baek Seol-hee smiled and pointed to herself.

“You won’t have to do housework. I’ll handle everything. Buy whatever you want. A computer, a projector—anything. Use my card freely.”

“…Wow.”

“Order any food you like. Or should I request someone from the Alliance to handle outside tasks for you?”

“Are you suggesting I become some kind of housemaid?”

Yumir interjected.

“When I’m out, you can help Ji-hwan however you want.”

“That’s a tempting offer.”

“You’re all unbelievable.”

I never expected things to fall apart this much.

“Do you ever think about anything else besides that nonsense?”

“Yeah. You’re the one who made it this way. If you’re upset, why don’t you turn back time and go back to when I didn’t know you?”

“Give it up. You know the saying, ‘Giving up makes life easier,’ right? Seol-hee and I weren’t like this originally. It’s all because of you, oppa.”

“It’s my fault?”

“Yes.”

“Absolutely.”

I had nothing to say.

If it weren’t for me, Baek Seol-hee would probably be thriving as an Academy professor, and Yumir would be gathering allies, pursuing her version of justice like the original protagonist.

“Mr. Do Ji-hwan, this isn’t a bad deal for you. Plenty of people will swarm around you with surveillance cameras and paparazzi. Wouldn’t it be better to just stay in my room instead of dealing with that?”

“Urgh…”

“If someone dares to come to my room while I’m out, who would dare? If anyone tries, I’ll come back immediately. Or I’ll just send out a clone and merge back with it later.”

“That’s not what clone control is supposed to be used for.”

“It’s exactly what I learned it for. What, do you think I trained to catch villains with my clones?”

Whether Baek Seol-hee leaves as her main body or sends out a clone, the constant remains: “Do Ji-hwan stays in Baek Seol-hee’s house.”

“The Academy will probably be fine with it, too. If you ever step out, I’ll just leisurely do the dishes at home while you’re gone.”

“Where do you think I’d go?”

“Who knows? Maybe Goblin will appear where a demon emerges, smashing the demon’s cradle and turning it into Zenros.”

“And in the meantime, Do Ji-hwan is…?”

“Let’s just say you’re in Baek Seol-hee’s basement. Simple, isn’t it?”

“…Wait a moment.”

I scanned the suite’s surroundings again.

The area outside the door, the windows, beyond the curtains, and even the floor below were filled with eyes and magical energy directed toward the room.

They seem determined to catch even a whisper, but the magical barrier Baek Seol-hee placed in the suite ensures no sound leaks, nor does any magical trace escape.

So.

[Let’s have a serious conversation for a moment.]

I put on my mask, revealing my identity.

[Actually, Do Ji-hwan is Goblin—]

“Oh. Goblin. Where did you come from?”

Baek Seol-hee’s expression remained unchanged as she spoke in a flat tone.

[……Are you reading from a textbook?]

“Where have you kidnapped Mr. Do Ji-hwan to, you kidnapper?”

She even accused me of abducting myself.

Without changing my clothes—more precisely, by lazily wrapping magic over my attire to mimic the appearance of my usual clothing—I simply revealed the mask.

[Hey, isn’t this supposed to be the dramatic moment where Do Ji-hwan reveals he’s Goblin?]

“You’re trying to hypnotize me, like those mind-control apps villains use, right?”

[Ugh, never mind.]

What’s the point of attempting a conversation with a woman who bulldozed her will even against the entire world?

“He tried to have a serious talk as Goblin, but Baek Seol-hee dismissed his bold coming-out as mere theatrics.”

“That’s spot on. As expected of Yumir.”

[…….]

The two of them, having spent so much time together, were perfectly in sync.

[There may be times when I’m overseas for two weeks at a stretch.]

“Wouldn’t that work out better? After all, Do Ji-hwan will still be in Baek Seol-hee’s house.”

[And if it gets revealed later that ‘Do Ji-hwan was actually Goblin,’ what will you do?]

“Then the answer is simple, isn’t it?”

Baek Seol-hee placed her hand on her lower abdomen and confidently puffed out her chest.

“As long as I have an S-class child, everything will be forgiven. Even if it wasn’t an affair but that you were a villain, people will look past it if the child is S-class.”

[Even if the villain committed murders?]

“It’ll be fine, even if it’s not an S-class.”

Yumir gave a thumbs-up from the side.

“With oppa’s genes, the child born from us couldn’t possibly be anything less than S-class—or even EX-class.”

[……]

“Or is it because of novels? Should I lend you some? If you end up stuck on Sejong Island and unable to work, I’ll use my account to order them and have them delivered daily.”

Oh.

“Looks like you’re interested.”

“Not interested, just intrigued.”

[…….]

I was not intrigued.