I'm A Spider, So What? (WN)-Chapter past-arc-6: Past Arc 6

Past Arc ⑥

Author「Gyuriedistodiez! Your name is too long!」

Gyuriedistodiez「!?」

Author「Therefore, you’ll be known as Gyurie in the narration from now on!」

Gyurie「!?」

Author「Actually, wouldn’t shortening it more to G be better!? 」

G「!!?」

After that incident, Gyurie started making extensive use of clairvoyance to study Sariel.

Dragons are supreme, all other races are just inferior creatures. That’s how he had been taught, and that’s what he had believed without any doubts. However, that common sense was completely overturned by one chance meeting with Sariel. A power that overwhelms any dragon on this planet. Having been shown a glimpse of that power, Gyurie had begun to doubts the words that dragons are supreme that he had believed until now.

Perhaps if Gyurie had meet a dragon who possed equal or greater power than Sariel, then possibly his thinking might not have been overturned. However, Gyurie was born and raised on this planet, and had not gone off this planet and into the universe. He had had no opportunity to meet with a superior dragon in the universe. Consequently, Gyurie’s knowledge of the upper limits of what dragons could achieve was restricted to dragons from the same planet, and Sariel had easily surpassed that. For that reason he started to doubt.

Were dragons really supreme beings?

Normally, dragons would never harbour such doubts. Perhaps it was because Gyurie was still young and had flexible thinking, or otherwise perhaps it was because Gyurie was somewhat unusual. Either way, he harboured doubts.

However, while that may be true, it wasn’t so simple for him to overturn what he had believed in until now. For that reason, Gyurie decided to make observations of Sariel who had become the trigger for his doubts. If he was to observe Sariel, then he had the hopes and fears of being able to determine whether or not dragons really were supreme. At that point the doubts within Gyurie had already changed his convictions, but since admitting that was galling, by somehow discovering Sariel’s faults he wanted to gain the peace of mind that “see, dragons are supreme after all”. All while turning his back on the reality that doing so wouldn’t change the fact that there was no dragon on this planet who could compete with Sariel in terms of combat ability.

And so, his observations of Sariel began. Fortunately for Gyurie he had plenty of time. The very existence of dragons are far removed from ordinary creatures. Not just in terms of their life span, but unlike normal creatures they can also subsist with minimal food and sleep. Because of that, the daily life of dragons is surprisingly quiet. It’s not unusual for them to do nothing for days on end. During such free time when he had nothing else to do, he would simply observe Sariel instead. He could observe her all day long.

Once Gyurie started observing her, his heart was filled with nothing but bewilderment. That what Sariel was doing was far too small in scope.

For example, if an epidemic broke out in a particular region, she would accompany the doctors. Indeed, from a human point of view, on seeing her bravely looking after patients she would be compared to a saint. However, from a god’s point of view, it would be simple to use magecraft to exterminate the virus that was the underlying cause of the disease. Sariel didn’t do that. Leaving matters to the doctors, she would allow humans to resolve it by themselves.

As he continued his observations, he repeatedly saw this pattern where she would fail to do something even though she should have been able to. What he gradually began to feel, was irritation. Why are you using such roundabout methods? For the sake of efficiency there should be far better methods. Surely by displaying the power of a god she would be able to solve a great many problems, yet she didn’t. Sariel’s inefficient methods, looked hypocritical to Gyurie. If you really want to save people, then surely it would be better to use the power of god without concern for how it was perceived. Despite that, Sariel stubbornly refrained from using the power of god.

Because of that there was a life she failed to save. A child that Sariel was nursing.

「Onee-chan, thank you.」

「Thanks are unnecessary. This is my mission.」

「See you tomorrow.」

「Yes, see you tomorrow.」

That was a casual exchange on leaving the hospital. That was the last conversation between Sariel and that child. When Sariel visited the hospital the next day, that child had passed away.

It should have been possible to save the child. So why didn’t she? And in spite of not saving the child, why did she then look so sad? When she was thanked, what was that subtle smile for?

Back when he begun the observations, Gyurie had thought that Sariel was a machine-like existence without any human kindness. He had been taught that that’s how angels were. However, he noticed that was wrong during his observations. Certainly Sariel appeared to be mechanically carrying out charitable work. However, there were flashes of what appeared to be emotions during casual moments.

Didn’t she seem happy, when thanked by that child? Didn’t she seem sad, when that child passed away? Despite that, as if those emotions had never existed, she then mechanically moved onto her next task.

As seen from a human point of view, Sariel’s actions were surely the epitome of salvation. She was practically worshipped as a goddess, and thanked. In response to that she always gave the same reply.

「Thanks are unnecessary. This is my mission.」

From a human perspective she surely seemed humble. However, Gyurie saw it differently. He saw her as a hypocrite wracked with guilt.

She could do it, but didn’t. Despite not doing so, failing to save people made her depressed. As Gyurie thought that it would be better to save them in the first place if she was going to get depressed about it, he got increasingly irritated. Then as if glossing over her depressed feelings, she mechanically moved on to her next task.

Did she really understand? Despite calling it her mission, she is taking action based on her emotions. Despite saying that her mission was the protection of the primitive lifeforms, she was biased towards saving humans. Every time Gyurie saw Sariel seemingly lacking in self-awareness, his irritation got increasingly larger. Gyurie himself had also not realised that he had forgotten his original objective.