MATED TO FATHER, FATED TO SONS-Chapter 20: IMPULSE

AMARIS

There is no way in hell, hades or the abyss of my ruins would I subject myself to Ryker’s manipulation.

"If you want more, come to my room by midnight."

Those were his words. His words after he made a mockery of me.

Then why the hell was I still thinking of it? Of him.

I should have shoved the idea of him down the drain and not even be entertaining it.

"I told you he wasn’t that bad," Nia whispered, interrupting my thoughts as she braided my hair into a single knot, her fingers working with efficiency.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I wasn’t sure what I was staring at but there was something different. Something in the eyes that hadn’t been there before.

"Are you talking about Ryker?" I asked, my eyes still fixated on the mirror.

"Yes, don’t you see how he stood up for you against his father," she said with a familiar admiration in her eyes.

"He is no hero, he did that only to rebel against his father, not because he wanted to save me."

She didn’t respond immediately. Instead she was silent for a moment, tying the last knot of the braid with a small tug.

"Yes, that may be true but he still stood up for you, that should count for something."

Well, it did count as something because right after that he kissed me and did unthinkable things that I am not even sure a Sharma could cleanse away from my mind.

"Well, he saved me from that scorching fire of that coal, although that would not be the first time I have been punished in that manner."

She looked at me, but her eyes didn’t have pity in them. It was more of understanding. She took three steps back and sank on the edge of my bed, her hands folding quietly in her lap.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked.

"Talk about what?" I asked back, feigning ignorance.

"It seems where you came from you didn’t really have the luxury of a good life there either."

I let out a sigh. It was indeed a luxury for me.

Being the unwanted daughter.

"I am not sure I want to talk about it, but..." I exhaled, refusing myself to sink into that hole of self-loathing.

I continued, "I am the daughter of a maid who was forcefully turned to a mistress by a monster who raped her and she died while giving birth to me." I paused, allowing my words to sink in. Not because I wanted it to weigh heavier, but I needed to catch my breath. 𝒇𝒓𝙚𝒆𝔀𝓮𝓫𝒏𝓸𝙫𝓮𝓵.𝓬𝙤𝙢

"Yeah, so I didn’t have that luxury," I huffed.

She stared at me. It still wasn’t sympathetic but close to it. Her eyes softened, just at the edges.

"That’s a lot and imagine being thrust into this after that."

"Yeah imagine."

I refuse to imagine, because I got through life by forgetting. If I held on to every painful memory, I might end up killing myself one day, an act of mercy.

"I am sure things would get better and in a little time everything will make sense."

I scoffed. My life had not made sense in almost two decades. Why should it now? Not with a cruel Alpha who wants to turn me into a breeder and discard me like trash after fulfilling that purpose.

Not with his son stirring up sexual desires in me I never knew was possible, but doing it to spite his dad for only gods knows what reason.

Not with the other son being nice to me but unable to stand up for me when his father was brutally punishing me, instead watching me burn.

"I would leave you to sleep now, Luna Amaris. Remember tomorrow we would be going to see the mating ceremony venue and do some planning," she reminded me.

I frowned and she smiled.

"I promise you, it will be fun," she added enthusiastically.

"Sure," I nodded. "Good night Nia."

She gave me a half smile, this time it was clearly sympathetic, right before she stood up from the bed and walked toward the door. With one last final glance, she closed it behind her, leaving me alone in the room.

The quiet settled around me.

I swiveled back to face my reflection in the mirror. I placed my hands gently on my lips.

On the lips he had kissed. That was my first kiss. And it had been exactly how I thought it would feel. But why?

My fingers lingered there, barely pressing.

It wasn’t just the kiss that kept pulling me back. It was everything after it.

The moment his fingers found that part of me I had never let anyone near, I had stopped breathing.

I remembered the sharp inhale, the way my own body had betrayed me so completely, arching toward him like it already knew something I didn’t.

The warmth of it, that slick, aching warmth, had spread through me in a way that felt almost violent in how good it was. I had gripped the fabric just to hold onto something solid because everything else had gone unsteady.

And he had watched my face the whole time.

That was the part I couldn’t shake. Not just what he did, but the way he looked at me while he did it. Like he was collecting something. Like he already knew what he would find and was simply enjoying being right.

I dropped my hands from my lips and looked away from the mirror.

It didn’t mean anything. It was spite dressed up as desire and I needed to remember that.

I stood up, reaching for my robe and pulling it around my shoulders. I wasn’t going to sleep, that much was obvious. I pushed my feet into my slippers and moved toward the door before I had fully decided to.

The hallway was dim, most of the lights already low for the night. I walked slowly, my hand trailing the wall for a moment before I pulled it back.

The corridor was ahead of me and I followed it without thinking too hard about where my feet were taking me, because if I thought about it I would stop.

I already knew where I was going.

I stopped in front of the door. Stood there for a breath, two. Then I knocked.

The seconds that followed felt longer than they were.

The door opened and he was there, shirtless, dark eyes catching the low light of the room behind him.

He looked at me for a moment, taking in the robe, the hour, the fact that I had come at all.

Then he smiled. Slow and knowing, like he had been waiting.

He reached out and pulled me in.