Raising Beast Cubs to Find a Husband-Chapter 101: (Xmas Special) The Warlords and the Leviathan Go Shopping

Chapter 101: (Xmas Special) The Warlords and the Leviathan Go Shopping

Day four of the Solstice.

The blizzard had finally cleared enough for the city gates to open.

This was excellent news for the economy. It was terrible news for the shopkeepers of the Grand Market.

Because today, the Four Warlords of the High Council—plus one very smug Leviathan King—had decided to go holiday shopping.

The Mission was to find the perfect Secret Solstice gifts for their cubs (and Primrose).

The Problem was that none of these men had ever shopped for anything that wasn’t a siege engine or a treaty.

"Gentlemen," General Rajah announced, standing at the entrance of the market. He was wearing a civilian coat that cost more than the entire street. "We have a tactical objective. Acquisition of Joy. We move in, we secure the assets, we extract. No civilian casualties."

"Understood," Lord Rurik grinned, cracking his knuckles. "I will wrestle the best gifts into submission."

"That is not how commerce works, Wolf," Archduke Cassian sighed, adjusting his scarf. "One exchanges currency for goods. One does not headlock the merchant."

Duke Lucien said nothing. He simply stood there, terrifying a passing mime just by existing.

And then there was King Caspian.

He was wearing a thick winter coat Primrose had lent him (it was slightly too small in the shoulders). He looked around the bustling market with wide, teal eyes.

"So many colors," Caspian murmured. "In the Deep, everything is blue or bioluminescent green. This is... aggressive."

Rajah turned to him, his tail twitching with residual annoyance from the Tree Topper Incident.

"Listen, Fish," Rajah growled. "We are tolerating your presence because Primrose insisted you need surface socialization. But do not think we have forgotten your hands on her waist."

"I have excellent memory," Caspian smirked. "It was a tactical lift. Gravity is harsh on the surface."

"I will show you harsh gravity," Rurik threatened, holding up a fist the size of a ham.

"Stop posturing," Jax interrupted.

Jax had tagged along as the official Civilian Consultant (aka Babysitter). He was leaning against a lamppost, flipping his coin.

"If you boys start a brawl, Primrose will put you all in the Time-Out Corner. Now, move out. We have gifts to buy."

The group entered Gepetto’s Wonders, a high-end toy shop.

The shopkeeper took one look at the five terrifying men and nearly fainted.

"W-welcome, Your Graces! And... Your Majesty! How can I help you?"

"I require a gift for Vali," Rurik announced, picking up a delicate porcelain doll. SNAP. The doll’s head popped off.

"Oops," Rurik whispered. He hid the head in his pocket. "Something stronger. Something that screams Wolf."

He wandered over to the outdoor section and picked up a bear trap.

"This!" Rurik cheered. "It snaps! It is metal! Vali will love it! It builds character!"

"No," Jax said, taking the trap away. "No maiming the children, Rurik. How about a ball?"

"A ball?" Rurik scoffed. "A ball does not teach survival!" 𝑓𝑟ℯ𝘦𝓌𝘦𝘣𝑛𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓁.𝑐ℴ𝓂

"It teaches fetch," Jax countered. "Vali likes fetch."

Meanwhile, Cassian was inspecting a shelf of educational games.

"I seek a gift for Jasper," Cassian told the trembling clerk. "Do you have a Calculus textbook? Or perhaps a miniature abacus made of diamond?"

"We have... blocks?" the clerk squeaked.

"Blocks are inefficient geometry," Cassian scoffed. "I shall commission a custom slide-rule."

Rajah was pacing in front of a display of swords.

"Arjun likes swords," Rajah muttered. "But Primrose says no sharp objects. This is a paradox."

He picked up a wooden practice sword. He swung it. WHOOSH. It shattered a display case of glass figurines.

"Tactical error," Rajah muttered.

He turned to Caspian. "You. Leviathan. What are you getting the fish-boy?"

Caspian was staring at a fishbowl containing a single, depressed goldfish.

"I am getting him a companion," Caspian said solemnly. "Orion says the surface is lonely. This creature looks... suitably stoic."

"You are buying a fish for a fish?" Lucien asked from the shadows. "That feels... redundant."

"It is a pet," Caspian defended. "We shall call him General. He looks grumpy."

Rajah narrowed his eyes. "Are you mocking me?"

"Perish the thought," Caspian smiled innocently.

This was the real challenge.

They stood outside a jewelry store.

"We must get her something," Rurik said, looking at a necklace made of wolf teeth. "This says I will bite your enemies."

"It says I am a savage," Cassian corrected. "She needs something elegant. A tome on magical theory. Or perhaps a snake-skin purse."

"That is literally your skin," Jax pointed out. "That’s weird, Cassian."

"It is high quality!"

"Shadows," Lucien whispered, pointing at a black velvet cloak. "Protection."

"No," Rajah interrupted. "She needs something practical. A dagger. For self-defense."

They looked at Caspian.

"Well?" Rajah challenged. "What does the King suggest?"

Caspian looked at the expensive jewelry, the weapons, the furs. He shook his head.

"Those are gifts for a Duchess," Caspian said softly. "Primrose is not a Duchess. She is a Nanny. She stands on her feet all day. She carries cubs. She makes good food."

He walked over to a small stall selling handmade goods. He picked up a pair of fluffy, wool-lined slippers. They were soft. They were warm. They were definitely not royal.

"These," Caspian decided. "And... that."

He pointed to a mug that said World’s BEST Nanny and a pair of fluffy fox slippers.

The Warlords stared at the items.

"Slippers? And a ceramic cup?" Rurik asked, looking personally offended. "Where is the glory? Where is the steel?"

"There is no glory in cold feet," Caspian said simply. "And as for the mug... the glory is in the coffee she drinks to tolerate us."

Rajah paused. He looked at the slippers. He looked at the mug.

He realized, with a sinking feeling, that the Fish was right.

"Fine," Rajah grunted. "We get the bundle. But I am paying for it."

"I saw them first," Caspian argued.

"I have more money!" Cassian interjected, pulling out a gold card.

"I will intimidate the merchant into giving them for free!" Lucien offered.

"NO!" Jax shouted. "We are splitting the bill! Five ways! Now buy the damn gift set before you scare the old lady!"

An hour later, they emerged from the market.

Rurik was carrying a giant bag of indestructible rubber balls.

Cassian had a custom-made puzzle box for Jasper.

Rajah had bought a wooden sword (blunt) and a Tiger onesie (he claimed it was tactical camouflage).

Lucien had a book of Spooky Bedtime Stories.

Caspian was carefully holding a bag with the goldfish, the slippers, and the mug wrapped in excessive bubble wrap.

They looked ridiculous. They looked terrifying.

"Mission accomplished," Rajah declared, adjusting his coat.

"We did good," Rurik grinned. "Now, lunch? I smell meat."

"I smell... victory," Caspian said, hugging the bag.

Rajah bumped Caspian’s shoulder—hard.

"Do not get used to it, Fish," Rajah growled. "Today was a truce. Tomorrow, we return to war."

"War for her heart?" Caspian asked quietly.

Rajah stopped. He looked at the King.

"War for everything," Rajah said.

But as they walked through the snow, bickering over where to eat, they didn’t look like enemies. They looked like a Pack. A weird, dysfunctional, terrifying Pack.

And Jax, walking behind them, just shook his head and flipped his coin.

"Primrose is going to kill them," he laughed.