Show Me Your Stats!-Chapter 82

Before checking the Stat Windows to choose suitable forces, Ayra first filtered the targets by gender—only men. The farther the distance, the more mana it consumed to view a Stat Window. With her limited mana pool, even just filtering by gender significantly reduced the overall mana cost. She moved around the river, checking stats. Homes closer to the water tended to have higher property values, and anyone able to afford those likely grew up well-fed and in good health.

But after wandering for a while, something kept catching her eye. For some reason, there were even more bald heads than yesterday.

'Okay, fine, shave your head—but why the eyebrows and beards too?'

She wondered if it was some kind of city fashion trend, but none of the bald men looked particularly cheerful. Some were stomping around, faces flushed red with rage like boiled octopuses, while others walked with their heads hung low, sniffling like they were on the verge of tears...

What in the world was going on?

Just as Ayra wandered in confusion, a strange notification popped up a little ways off.

[NPC Hair Skin being patched to Bald... (1/3)]

Blinking in disbelief, she followed the notification and arrived at a deserted back alley, where three people were collapsed on the ground. Crouched beside them was a man with unforgettable bright red hair, his hands moving briskly. With each motion, the hair of the unconscious townspeople vanished with a fwoop, leaving their scalps smooth and shiny.

"...What the hell."

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Ayra was struck speechless. She’d never seen anything so absurd in her life. As she stood there dumbfounded, the notification updated.

[NPC Hair Skin being patched to Bald... (2/3)]

"Janus, what the hell are you doing over there?"

He must’ve noticed her approach ages ago with his heightened senses, but he didn’t acknowledge her until he’d finished shaving the final person bald. Brushing his palms together to flick off stray hair, he strolled over like a thug and greeted her with an oddly affectionate kiss.

But for a greeting kiss between lovers who just happened to bump into each other, the way his tongue flicked across her lips felt far too suggestive. Was it just her imagination? Apparently not, as Janus suddenly pulled her into a suffocating embrace and asked out of nowhere:

"Wanna do it?"

...Here? In broad daylight? With three bald unconscious people lying just behind them?

What an absolutely unappealing offer.

Ayra, face soured, glanced at the gleaming bald heads cooling in the winter wind, then flatly refused.

"Not here, no... But seriously, what were you doing? Why are you shaving people’s heads?"

She’d wondered why there were so many bald people around lately, but the idea that Janus had been the one going around shaving them had never once crossed her mind. If this was just some random bout of mischief, fine—but what if it was some sort of ritual before he destroyed Solar?

Feeling uneasy, Ayra watched as Janus shrugged.

"Didn’t you say you wished you could stamp a mark on people’s faces to make them easier to round up?"

"A stamp on their—oh!"

She finally remembered the conversation from the night she got caught slipping powder into Janus’s drink.

“Ugh, I can’t just wipe them all out, and interrogating every idiot who screws up is a pain. I wish I could just stamp something on their face to make them easy to spot.”

“Aww, my poor lover’s struggling. Yeah, a stamp would make things easier, huh...”

Wait, so he was shaving people’s heads because of that?

Eyes wide, Ayra gaped as Janus replied casually.

"Branding their faces would be a bit cruel, right? But if they’re bald, they’re easy to identify. Hair’s easy to hide, so I shaved the eyebrows too."

That’s just... that’s just a negative version of a skinhead.

At least Russian skinheads shaved themselves. This was essentially forced facial branding.

Ayra finally understood why nothing major had happened over the past couple of days. Janus had been crawling around the back alleys like a rat, shaving anyone who looked sketchy bald.

Guess that’s what you get when you’re dealing with a dragon... His methods were utterly unique—and borderline insane.

Ayra couldn’t even begin to imagine what kind of ripple effect this would have. She was grateful—but not really. It was a massive headache. Still, technically, he’d done it to help her—even if he did look like he was having way too much fun doing it—so she offered her thanks.

"Thanks for going to the trouble."

"Mhm, sure."

Janus barely acknowledged her words as he subtly began guiding her away from the scene. Wondering if her gratitude hadn’t landed quite right, Ayra tried flattering him a bit more.

"You knocked out all three of them at once? I thought the same thing when you took down the Occampania gang, but your skills really are incredible. And it must’ve been hard to shave both their heads and eyebrows so cleanly with such a worn-out blade."

Hoping to bump up her favorability score even by a decimal point, Ayra laid on the praise. Janus, however, gave her a lukewarm look. He seemed to be thinking, “You’re praising me for giving people clean bald shaves in this situation? I know you’re a mage, but your priorities are kind of...” But since she was his lover, he forced himself to agree.

"...Well, thanks."

Now being treated like she was the weird one, Ayra’s eyelashes twitched with irritation. Excuse me? He’s the one doing insane shit out here, and he looks at me like I’m the oddball?

Pandering to this dragon was exhausting.

What’s worse, Janus’s steps were gradually leading them into a more secluded alley. At first, she thought he was just trying to get them away from the scene, but now she wasn’t so sure. Right as he turned around and braced his hand against the wall—classic wall pin—Ayra threw up both hands.

He paused, scowling.

"It’s because of the bald guys, isn’t it?"

"Well, yeah, that too, but..."

Let’s be real—no one wants to have sex in the same spot where three gleaming bald dudes just collapsed. Still, Ayra decided to get a read on Janus’s preferences.

"Do you like doing it outdoors?"

"Not particularly."

"Or in places where people can watch?"

That would be a serious problem for Ayra, who might one day have to appear publicly as a noble. Fortunately, Janus simply shrugged with a disinterested expression.

"I just don’t think it’s anything to stress over. I thought you didn’t care either... But I guess broad daylight is a bit much?"

"I do care about things like that..."

What the hell does this dragon think of me?

Even as she said that, the incident in the alley in Bolni resurfaced in her mind, and she cleared her throat with a cough. At the same time, a cold sweat broke out along her spine.

To be completely honest, she was terrified of Janus’s utterly inhuman, truly draconic sexual stamina. If he had been bad at it, she could’ve just endured it like torture. But he wasn’t. He was good. So good that with every round, he discovered a new erogenous zone Ayra hadn’t even known she had. His movements were refined, skilled—steadily leveling up like he was farming experience.

But Ayra, who had the body of a normal human man, simply couldn’t keep up with Janus’s stamina and libido.

That night, she’d learned that you could climax even when you weren’t hard. That an orgasm could last several minutes. That dragons could come as much as they wanted and still stay hard. All of it was «N.o.v.e.l.i.g.h.t» shocking.

As a mage devoted to the pursuit of knowledge, she was supposed to welcome new discoveries—but this one only filled her with dread.

What truly terrified her, though, was the face she saw just before passing out: Janus’s. Even as he reluctantly pulled out when she finally fainted, there was unmistakable disappointment on his face. Even now, his red eyes held a hunger, an unfulfilled lust, that dripped from his gaze like blood.

Shivering, Ayra mumbled something vague about not wanting to do it in the alley and changed the subject as fast as possible.

"I haven’t eaten since last night. Want to go get something?"

"...You haven’t eaten since last night?"

Janus’s face twisted into a frown. Without asking further, he gave Ayra a quick once-over, his displeasure obvious. And sure enough, a notification appeared.

[Janus Rehzedet’s Favorability has decreased by 1!]

Current Favorability: -31

"I just—! I fell asleep and missed dinner and breakfast, that’s all."

Ayra scrambled to explain. Clicking his tongue in frustration, Janus placed his warm hand on Ayra’s now-silent, flat stomach. Another notification popped up.

[Janus Rehzedet’s Favorability has decreased by 2!]

Current Favorability: -33

Excuse me...?

Apparently, the Lord of Solar neglecting her own health was something Janus absolutely despised. Whether it stemmed from possessiveness or genuine concern, Ayra wasn’t sure. But with her favorability now plunging to an almost irreparable depth, she could only hope it was the latter. Even Aterra te Act didn’t hate Solar’s lord this much.

‘I’m too scared to even say I’m hungry now.’

At this point, she figured she might as well just offer herself up for the day... Her new goal was to raise her favorability enough that, before the two scores were combined, the net wasn’t still negative.

Luckily, Janus wasn’t the kind of heartless dragon who’d ignore a hungry lover and just go straight to sex. On the way home, he bought hot buns and stuffed one into her mouth. Then, telling her to wait, he left—and returned thirty minutes later, lugging in a steaming, blood-dripping hunk of deep red meat.

"...What the hell is that?"

"Red-horned mountain goat. It’s best eaten fresh like this. Good for stamina and libido too."

...Stamina and libido.

Ayra watched, eyes trembling, as Janus carved the goat into perfect portions without even breaking a sweat.

And, as promised, the meat was delicious. Janus made sure she ate an entire hind leg. He even ground up the goat’s red horn and sprinkled it like seasoning on top. Ayra clung to the hope that the meal would help boost her strength and endurance.

But that night, all she learned... was that red-horned goat meat and powdered horns weren’t actually all that effective.