SSS Ranked Shadow Monarch: Summoning Infinite Shadows-Chapter 187: Break Up

The group found a building where they stayed to rest. Aren took some time to himself, while Athena and Zero took care of the others.

He sat there, nothing else going through his mind except the memories that had flashed to him in that moment.

"What were those memories? Those people that died? Did I kill them? Was it my fault?

How could I do something like that and have no recollection? Ahhh, nothing makes sense anymore.

What happened in my childhood, who was I really?"

Only now, as he began questioning, did Aren realize that the memories of his life as Nathan that he believed were his were not making sense anymore.

There were gaps showing up, things that didn’t make any sense. The more he thought about it, the less sense it made, but just as it seemed like he was going to remember something very crucial, a stabbing headache rammed into his head so hard that it forced him to stop.

"Ahhh."

He held his head, trying to calm down. The pain slowly subsided, and he could relax.

He leaned his back against a wall, eyes looking at the damaged ceiling.

Step, step, step.

He heard footsteps. He looked, it was Kira. He was stunned to see her walking already.

He got up and moved to hug her. He wrapped his hands around her, but she didn’t. Aren noticed that, but he chalked it up to her still being tired.

He wanted to say something, but she cut him short. "We have to talk."

When he heard that and saw her serious tone, he knew something was coming. She took a step back to put some distance between them.

"I take it Zero has told you what happened," he said.

"No, I heard everything. When I was dying there on the ground, I could still hear, even though it was slowly slipping away," she explained.

"I see. Kira, I’m sorry," he said, looking her right in the eye.

"I’m sorry, Aren. Sorry doesn’t cut it," she stated.

"Then what do you want? Whatever it is, I’ll do it to make up," he said in a pleading tone, but she shook her head.

"Aren, you chose Aiden over me," she said.

"His situation was more dire. I needed to save him or he would have died for sure," Aren argued.

"Zero told you I was about to die," Kira shot back.

"You had a heartbeat. Although weak, you stood a better chance at survival than Aiden," he said.

She frowned deeply. "You didn’t know if the totem would help Aiden. It wasn’t a fifty-fifty with him, it was a ninety to ten, but I would have surely survived had you given it to me," she said.

"But you did survive." 𝑓𝓇𝘦ℯ𝘸𝘦𝑏𝓃𝑜𝘷ℯ𝑙.𝑐𝑜𝓂

"That’s not the point," she said in anger. "The point is I could have died, and you didn’t choose me." Tears welled up in her eyes.

"I was trying to do what was best for the group."

"No, you were trying to do what was best for you," she shot back. "What was best for the group would have been choosing me, the one with the better chance to live.

What would have been best for me and you is choosing me, the person you said you love," she said, her tone gradually rising.

"Kira, please."

"No. Not now, Aren. You chose Aiden not because you wanted what was best. You chose him because of how fragile you are. If someone died under you and it seemed you were the cause, you wouldn’t be able to handle it.

What you have isn’t love for us, it’s fear. You are two sides of an extreme, Aren, and you are incapable of a rational middle ground. You are against having close relationships because you fear you’ll do too much, and when you do, you start actually doing too much," she let all her feelings out.

"Kira," Aren called her, looking her right in the eyes. "I couldn’t let Aiden die," he said.

"But you were willing to let me die?" she asked.

"You weren’t going to die."

"YOU DID NOT KNOW THAT!" she yelled. "You were acting on hope and belief that I would somehow cling to life even after hearing my heartbeat fade away."

"I’m sorry, Kira, but you should be happy. Our group stayed alive, everyone is fine, Aiden is alive," Aren said.

"Oh, I’m happy. I’m happy Aiden is alive. I’m happy we are all physically fine, but it does not change the fact of what you did. I’m alive because of luck, not because of you, and you had the ability to save me without luck, and you didn’t," she said.

"Kira, it was a matter of priority, what was best for the group," he said. Her eyes widened.

"So my life wasn’t best for the group, Aren?" she asked.

"That’s not what—"

"Then what do you mean?" she yelled, shocking him back.

"Kira, please," but she didn’t listen, shoving him again.

"I’m your priority, Aren. I am your girlfriend," she yelled. "Yes, the group is family, but are you trying to tell me that I am on the same level as everyone in the group in your heart?

Fuck that. I’m probably lower, because your first instinct should have been to save me, me, Aren, your girlfriend.

You told me you love me. I guess that wasn’t the type of love I expected," she said and backed away.

"Kira, wait, please, let me make it up," Aren begged, but she shook her head.

"What’s the point of dating you if I get the same treatment as the rest of the group? I’d rather stay a normal part of the group.

I want to hurl hurtful words at you, I want to beat you up, but I still love you, Aren, and I can’t accept how you love me. You are still a great guy and a stunning person, but I guess that’s not for me," she said, and then turned to walk away. Aren stretched his hands to hold her or call her, but then he dropped them, watching her leave.

"Fuck," he muttered as he walked back to the wall and slid down, burying his head in his knees.