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Supreme Degenerate Lust System-Chapter 12: Barman and his Wife!!!
Chapter 12: Barman and his Wife!!!
"I thought this town was poor?"
Alex muttered, side-eyeing the surroundings like a man checking his wallet in a suspicious alley.
"The town is poor..."
Celeste replied, her voice soft yet informative — like she was narrating a history documentary no one asked for.
"Half the townspeople are breaking their backs in the paddy fields, but all the rice gets shipped out faster than a bad online purchase. The real money? Comes from the tavern we're heading to."
"The tavern?"
Alex blinked.
"Is this town some fancy tourist attraction or something?
He asked this while sneakily shifting his eyes — not his head, just his eyes — to the side.
His pupils were glued to Celeste's chest, which was busy defying gravity with the grace of a goddess and the bounce of a particularly enthusiastic trampoline.
Celeste giggled, shaking her head — and a little more.
"No, you silly... ha ha ha..."
She said with a warm smile that Alex was sure could cure depression — or cause it, depending on the circumstances.
"You idiot!"
Ellie finally snapped, her patience detonating like a poorly-handled fireball.
"This town's a major crossroads connecting the four big cities of the kingdom! You don't even know that?! Are you stupid or what?!"
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She folded her arms and puffed her cheeks like an angry hamster.
"Pfft... Oh yeah, 'cause geography's so important when you're busy fighting off magical tree monsters and dodging tentacle attacks..."
Alex muttered under his breath.
"What's that?!"
Ellie barked.
"Nothing, nothing... just admiring the architecture."
Alex said quickly, averting his eyes and wondering if the tavern would at least have some decent ale to wash down this humiliation.
"You do know he doesn't have his memory, right?"
Celeste shot back, her voice dripping with sass.
"Why are you getting mad at him? Bullying an innocent isn't heroic — it's just being a dick with extra steps. Oh my lord and saviour, forgive this imbecile for uttering such profanity."
She quickly drew a cross on her chest like a saint, and glared at Ellie once again.
"Just focus on your task, Ellie... hmpf!"
With that, Celeste whipped her head to the side like she was in a shampoo commercial, crossing her arms like a bratty princess on strike — an exact copy of Ellie's signature tantrum pose.
Ellie's eye twitched.
She muttered something that sounded suspiciously like "I hope you step on a Lego" before storming off, her hips swaying aggressively and her dangerously short shorts riding up in a way that made Alex's brain temporarily blue screen.
'Wow... Go Celeste baby, GO!'
Alex gave Celeste a silent round of applause, clapping his hands without a sound like some kind of proud mime.
Celeste just giggled and tossed him a playful wink that hit him harder than any fireball spell ever could.
...
"Six rooms, huh? That'll be 18 silver per day."
The barman leaned on the counter like he was posing for a dramatic movie poster, shoving his pinky finger so deep into his ear it looked like he was trying to unlock a cheat code in his brain.
The guy was massive — built like a walking tree trunk that just happened to slap on a beard and a vest.
Muscles bulged under his coat like he was smuggling bowling balls, but despite all that intimidating bulk, Alex was sure this guy's brain had been bench-pressed right out of his skull.
'Yeah... classic musclehead. Straight outta the 'Dumb Brute' starter pack.'
Alex thought, rolling his eyes.
The tavern was like someone had crammed a circus, a frat party, and a chaotic family reunion into one chaotic mess.
Dancers twirled like they were allergic to stillness, waiters zigzagged through the crowd like caffeinated squirrels, and a squadron of wenches and whores worked the room like it was their personal stage.
It wasn't just bustling — this place was practically vibrating with energy.
"Ehh... 15 silver. 15 will be sufficient."
The barman suddenly said, his gaze landing directly on Alex like he'd just spotted a goblin wearing a prom dress.
The group blinked. Why the sudden discount?
The mystery was solved when the barman hollered,
"Hey, Sammy! Come 'ere and look at this retard! Ha ha ha... he looks like an ugly cock with a mucus infection!"
The barman exploded with laughter, practically doubling over like someone had punched him in the gut with a joke grenade. His belly jiggled like a waterbed during an earthquake.
Alex's temple throbbed like a drum solo at a rock concert, but he plastered on a grin that screamed "I'm too dumb to understand insults!"
Clearly, both he and the barman had mentally filed each other under 'Certified Idiot.'
From behind him came a chorus of barely muffled snickers. Alex turned to see his so-called "companions" failing miserably to hide their amusement.
Celeste just gave him a wry chuckle and a shake of her head, the universal sign for "Suck it up, champ — we're broke."
'This better be worth my tim—OH SWEET BABY JESUS ON A JET SKI!'
Any anger evaporated faster than cheap ale at a pirate's wedding. Because striding out from behind the barman came a woman — and oh sweet merciful gods, what a woman.
She was about chest-high compared to the bar man, but that didn't matter. What she lacked in height, she made up for in every other department.
She slapped the big guy's arm like she was swatting a mosquito, and suddenly this muscle mountain looked like he needed a hug.
Her body? Lean but meaty enough to make any red-blooded man forget his name.
The apron barely managed to cover her cleavage, which looked like two perfectly sculpted cannonballs, defying gravity like they were held up by divine intervention.
Nothing saggy, nothing droopy — just two majestic peaks standing tall like they were auditioning for Mount Olympus.
'Holy hell... if those things were any perkier, they'd be giving motivational speeches.'
Her face was pure artwork — the kind you'd stare at in a museum and whisper "Damn..." under your breath.
Her red, plump lips glistened like cherries dipped in sin, and Alex couldn't help but wonder what those lips might look like wrapped around his... well, let's just say his imagination was working overtime.
Her brown hair cascaded down her back like a waterfall of midnight silk, and those black eyes? They had the same mysterious vibe as a poker player with a royal flush.
As his gaze wandered down, his eyes landed on her flat stomach — the kind you'd run your fingers over just to see if it's real — and hips so wide they practically bullied the poor apron into submission.
The thing looked like it was seconds away from tapping out.
Alex licked his lips like a dog eyeing a steak, and sure enough, his southern soldier rose to attention.
His heart pounded like a drum solo in a metal band. Was it the whole older-woman vibe that had him feeling this way? Or was there some mysterious milf-magic in the air?
[DING! DING! DING!]
It turned out the universe was just as thirsty as he was.
[Sudden Quest: Grope Sammy!]
[Reward: 2 Lust Points + 3 First-Time Bonus Lust Points]
[Time Limit: 1 Hour]
Alex blinked.
'Wait... what in the unholy hell kind of pervy system is this?!'
This wasn't a quest — this was an invitation to get his face rearranged by a woman who looked like she could crush his head with just her thighs, but boy was our protagonist down bad...
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