Surviving the Assassin Academy as a Genius Professor-Chapter 196: Contract Marriage (2)

Even an evil law is still law,

Even hypocrisy is still virtue.

Not hating Rebecca anymore... still counts as hating her.

“......”

Rebecca already had a bad personality, but she gets much worse when she holds power.

This has been proven repeatedly through various incidents.

Back during our “engagement,” things were different. Back then, it was the royal family trying to put a leash on me—they made the offer, which meant they held the power, and Rebecca, having to follow orders, was in the lower position.

But this time, I’m trying to stab my way into the royal family. I’m the one begging her for a contract marriage. Rebecca would hold all the cards.

“Why me?”

“When I was desperate, you bit down and rejected me, but now the roles are reversed. Life’s funny, huh?”

“Why don’t you go lick my toes. Like a dog.”

(Imagining Rebecca arrogantly rejecting me with her chin raised...)

Her toes?

Ah!

It’s just all so goddamn disgusting......

“Maybe the ‘Life♥’ route would actually be better.”

From what I’d heard, the prince had a decent personality. Handsome, well-mannered, clean. Apparently, he was solely focused on swordsmanship and imperial education.

“......”

And so now, I’m stuck seriously considering the 『Stigma Imprint♥』 option.

Maybe Glory will handle it all on his own eventually...

Maybe Setian turns out to be a pacifist demon who doesn’t cause any trouble...

“...Yeah, no chance.”

The Demon King War is a battle against time.

If the main story goes all the way to chapter 13, that just means more people have died, the Demon King’s forces have grown stronger—

And my own chances of survival get even worse.

That line of thinking got nailed into place when I received a call from Professor Hicks Bohr that night.

— Hicks Bohr: Professor Dante. I think I just saw something I really shouldn’t have seen...

— Hicks Bohr: Long story short, your claim that Hiaka’s two-horned demons are “in contact” with the Imperial family? That’s not accurate.

— Me: Then?

— Hicks Bohr: It’s not “contact.” They were never separate in the first place.

— Hicks Bohr: (photo)

After that, Hicks Bohr showed me a photo. My brow furrowed without even meaning to.

“This is...”

Something extremely dangerous had been discovered within the Imperial Palace.

It was proof that the Demon King War was far closer than we’d expected.

— Me: Be careful, Professor. Erase every trace. If they find out this leaked, you’ll be marked for assassination.

— Hicks Bohr: Got it... I’m aware of the risk.

I steeled myself.

『 Stigma Imprint I: 「Life♥」 ⊂ 「Dante Hiakapo」 』

< Star Fragments Held: 66 (▼10) >

Just a test.

Just for one day.

⋮

“Adele.”

A strange voice—slightly higher than usual.

“Hm? Who are you? The professor’s not here..., ...wait, who...?”

Adele turned around and tilted her head at me.

Her eyes grew serious for a second.

Then they widened, hugely.

“...?? P-Professor...??”

***

Let me just say it up front.

It was a failure.

“Woooow, Professor, you’re seriously so pretty!”

The moment Adele started jumping up and down, I was hit with a bizarre, overwhelming sense of shame I couldn’t explain.

“Look in the mirror. Look!!”

No.

I grit my teeth and turned my head away.

“Hey! Look, I said!”

Adele jammed the mirror in front of my face with brute force.

I turned left—mirror came left.

I turned right—mirror followed.

Save me.

I closed my eyes. Like an ostrich burying its head in the sand...

“Hey, seriously? You’re not even gonna look?!”

“Don’t.”

“Ahhhh! Look! Just look already! You’re pretty! Why are you being so embarrassed?!”

“Why are you so excited?”

“Because it’s fun! Do you even know what your face looks like right now, Professor?”

I don’t.

What is it?

Actually—never mind. Don’t care.

“And that pose right now? The way your shoulders and arms are covering your body? It’s like, so...”

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

YOUR HONOR I HEARD NOTHING AND MY CAT IS ON FIRE AND

Adele burst out laughing and finally pulled the mirror away.

“Kyaaaaaha! Ahahahahahahahaha!!”

Meanwhile, I started thinking.

Why was I embarrassed?

I didn’t know.

It was just weirdly shameful.

My clothes were just a plain T-shirt and shorts I’d bought for the elephant. Maybe it was the long hair...

“But you know, Professor.”

“What.”

“How did this happen? It’s not like you took an assassination contract or anything..., ...wait a sec??”

Adele’s eyes narrowed as a cartoon exclamation mark floated over her head.

“...Professor, I didn’t take you for that type. Is this your thing? Like how the manliest act a man can do is crossdress...?”

“It’s not. What the hell do you think I am.”

I carefully explained that this was done out of necessity.

“Aaah, gotcha? This ➤ NоvеⅠight ➤ (Read more on our source) is the Life♥ Stigma, right? I actually looked into it before! Was thinking about trying being a guy for a day.”

“......”

“Look at you—you can’t even open your eyes. This is hilarious! Ahahaha! Anyway, since it’s just for a day, I have to take a picture~~!”

“...Don’t.”

“Whyyy not? Hands off your face. Do a V pose, come on, V~~!”

Don’t!!

“Whoa!? You’re running away!!”

Adele dashed after me. I scrambled up the stairs toward my second-floor room, but Ran was coming down from the mini lab and spotted me on the stairs.

“Unnie! Catch that girl!”

“...Why.”

“She’s a thief!”

“...?”

Ran tilted her head but spread her arms anyway, and I had no choice but to stop.

As Adele started pulling out the [Crystal Orb], I had no option but to jump out the window.

CRASH!!

...And so, after that brief chase, I somehow avoided having my photo taken.

Which brought me back to thinking seriously again.

“But, Professor.”

“...I’ll listen.”

I immediately regretted hearing my own voice. It was the depressed voice of a sad woman.

But the real crisis wasn’t any of this.

“There’s something else to consider.”

“What.”

“If you’re this embarrassed about taking a photo with us, how are you going to survive the wedding shoot?”

Wedding shoot?

Oh.

OH...!!

“Hm? It’s true, right? If you marry the prince, you’ll have to wear a wedding dress, and right now you’re covering yourself just from wearing shorts and a tee.”

“......”

“And maybe you don’t realize it yet, but hair, makeup, and coordination? That’s no joke either.”

Hair-Makeup-Co?

“Hair, Makeup, Coordination. Can I try doing your makeup right now? Oh—this’ll be fun.”

“...No.”

I couldn’t even speak properly, and then Ran chimed in.

“And there’s the ceremony itself. All royal events are reinforced with high-grade Death SpiritΩ Stigmas, so 『Glass Butterfly』 and other illusions won’t work. You’ll have to attend in person.”

“......”

“You’ll have to smile at countless people. Hold an elder’s hand and walk down the Virgin Road. Since you’ll become the queen consort, every noble and high official will be watching you.”

“......”

“Right now, all the high-society ladies aiming for the prince are already sharpening their claws. They’ll be looking you up and down like evil mother-in-laws, thinking, ‘Let’s see what kind of tramp she is.’ You’ll have to walk gracefully, display elegance. Otherwise, they’ll ignore you—and even if it’s just a contract marriage, you’ll lose all influence in the royal family.”

“You think that’s all?”

Ran raised a finger.

“You’ll have to read the marriage vows. And just from the way you’re speaking now, I can tell the voice alone is torturing you. The vows are like giving a speech—for three full minutes, alone.”

You think that’s all?

“As per tradition, you’ll also have to choke up during the ring exchange. In all of royal history, there’s never been a bride who didn’t cry during the wedding.”

I thought about it carefully.

Walking gracefully and elegantly down the aisle, then standing awkwardly and reading the vows...

Maybe that part was doable?

Though the crying while receiving the ring... that might be too much...

“...If I just... poke myself in the eye or something...”

“If it were just that, perhaps you could manage. But... the final step is a different matter.”

The final step?

“You have to kiss the prince.”

?????

“...Seems you overlooked that part. You’ve clearly underestimated weddings, Professor. Do you think the lifelong union of a man and woman is that easy? Let me show you.”

Ran suddenly told me to conjure up a wedding scene. I was terrified, but I did as told and cast [Illusion].

Then Ran placed a marble marked with the character 男 above her head, and in the next instant, her body began transforming—into a man.

Tall, expressionless, a male version of herself.

“Whoa? Wow! You can even do this?”

“I don’t have a gender to begin with.”

I had a pretty good idea where this was going. And it terrified me.

But it was time to face it.

“Now, will the bride and groom please pledge eternity with a kiss.”

Adele was officiating.

The large-bodied Ran began approaching me. It was truly... a shocking feeling.

Even more so than the first day of possession, when I had to dodge Forte’s bullets. This was way worse.

Ran lowered her hand like removing a veil, then cupped my cheek.

“......”

Uhh.

Don’t come any closer.

No, no, no, no, no, no—

Don’t lick your bottom lip with your tongue.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no—

Don’t grab the back of my head. Don’t tilt my neck. Don’t close your eyes.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

“...Stop.”

Without realizing it, I slapped Ran’s face away.

I quickly erased the [Illusion].

And then collapsed inwardly in despair.

“This is completely insane... I absolutely can’t do it...”

My internal resistance pierced the stratosphere.

Even though, objectively, male-Ran was quite handsome.

“It’d honestly be better if the world just ended.”

I turned my head—the two assistants were clicking their tongues.

I tried desperately to find alternatives.

“Small wedding...”

“Hmm, even in a small wedding, you’ll still have to kiss~”

“Home wedding...”

“Even if it’s a contract marriage, it’s still a marriage. If it’s just the two of you, what if the prince makes a move? Can you handle being pushed onto the bed?”

“J-just a marriage registration...”

The two of them simultaneously looked troubled.

“Come on, Professor. Like that’s gonna work~”

“Do you think royal events are some kind of joke?”

After being scolded, I shut my eyes.

“......”

The only option left... was becoming Rebecca’s husband.

Oh heavens...

***

Free-pass to womanhood.

It was already evening, and I hadn’t even bathed (I couldn’t).

Worst part? I’d used up the entire one-day token, so I couldn’t revert back yet. I was holed up in my room when—

Thud!

Someone showed up.

“?”

It was the elephant.

“???”

A confused expression.

I was confused too.

What the hell?

I hadn’t seen her since morning, so I figured she’d gone off to find her comrades or something. Guess not?

Then Eve came up to me, brought her nose close, sniffed all around, furrowed her brow, and kept tilting her head repeatedly.

“......”

I was trying to figure out what to do when—

Swiish—

Eve suddenly pulled a sword out of subspace.

Insane.

She’d obviously mistaken me for an intruder.

I frantically waved my hands.

'It’s me. Me. Don’t attack.'

'???'

'Thud.'

Eve stabbed the sword into the ground and gestured.

'Who?'

'Dante.'

I started finger-spelling my name in sign language—then realized it looked like I was mimicking a cat, which filled me with violent internal disgust—but whatever, I just kept acting like a cat.

“......”

Eve’s expression stiffened, and her hand drifted back toward her sword.

No, no, don’t do that.

'...His younger sister.'

I rushed to clarify.

'??? Dante’s younger sister?'

'Yeah.'

'Sign language? How?'

'Learned it. From Dante.'

'.......'

Finally, Eve smiled and welcomed me.

Then, for some reason, she grabbed my hand and dragged me outside. We had to walk around near Byulmaji Mountain.

And then, out of nowhere, she said something:

'I like Dante.'

Then she pulled out some acorns and apples from who-knows-where and offered them to me.

I guess it was her way of saying, “We’re family, so let’s be friends.”

I answered.

'Dante likes you too. Says you’re close.'

The elephant grinned brightly.

And I found myself thinking—

“......”

'Wouldn’t it be better if she were the princess instead?'