The General's Wife Wants to Leave-Chapter 157: Without the dream

Joanna stepped out of the inn when the rising sun cast a rosy hue across the morning sky, making a sigh escape her lips with that realization as her father’s entourage never left the inn this late.

Walking together with her father and her husband to the front yard of the inn where the carriages had been parked, Joanna separated from her father as they had to take their respective carriages once they arrived at the parking area.

However, before Joanna stepped inside her carriage, where the door was already opened by her husband for her to step in, her focus was shifted, which made her halt and stand in front of the opened door of the carriage.

Three carriages away from the left side of her carriage, she caught sight of the daughter of Viscount Henderson, named Erna, shrunk in the arms of a middle-aged, slightly burly, and average-height man.

Joanna could not tell who the man was. But if he stayed in the same inn as hers and headed to the capital, then he was likely to be a nobleman who would attend the royal banquet.

But Joanna’s main concern was not about who the man was or where he headed, but the solely young lady who shrank in fear next to the man.

"Joanna..."

Joanna heard Canillas, who stood on her right side, call her. Turning her head to look at him, Joanna found him smile and slightly tilt his head to the side, to which Joanna saw his hand stretch out for her to take.

Placing her hand on his without taking as much time to contemplate as she usually did, Joanna looked back at Erna, who was also looking back at her.

"Joanna..."

Subconsciously, Joanna gripped Canillas’ hand while fixing her gaze on Erna, not shifting her head to see the man who called out her name. And their gazes were broken when Erna was nudged by the man to enter what seemed to be his carriage.

She could not see clearly what insignia was engraved on the carriage of the man. But it was lavish enough to not be called an aristocrat’s carriage.

A question then appeared in Joanna’s mind. How much did the impudent Viscount obtain after sending off his own daughter to that man? Was he happy now that he had sold one of his daughters to a man who deserved to be regarded as her father?

The surfacing thoughts made Joanna grip the hand in hers more tightly.

"Joanna..."

Joanna heard she was being called again, but she did not turn her head in the direction of the coming voice yet as she kept standing there with her hand on Canillas’, watching the carriage, where Erna was, leave and disappear from her sight.

Sensing her emotions, Canillas did not call out Joanna again after that, as he knew where her thoughts were pooled just by feeling how she gripped his hand. Hence, he just stood there by her side, accompanying and waiting for her to calm her emotions.

A few seconds later, when he saw that the point where Joanna’s eyes followed had completely disappeared from their sight, Canillas said, "It’s time to leave, Joanna. Your father is waiting for us." He softly rubbed the back of Joanna’s hand, which was in his, with his thumb, as if trying to wake her from her trance and soothe her mind.

Joanna faintly nodded her head but did not move her gaze from the direction where the carriage brought the impudent Viscount’s daughter away.

"Let’s go, Joanna," Canillas demanded, gently gripping Joanna’s hand when he found her still nailed to the ground, to which Joanna turned her head to look at him.

For a moment, she fixed her eyes on Canillas’, and Canillas saw them quivering.

"She will be fine," Canillas reassured with a small smile, as if knowing the question that she asked him through her worried gaze.

Joanna nodded her head, though she knew that what Canillas said was just to soothe her, as no one could guarantee that that young lady would be fine. But she really hoped she was fine, just like her wish that she made for her and her sister the day before in the inn restaurant.

It was common to be found in the land of Terra, where young ladies, particularly those who came from lower- to middle-class and those who were regarded as illegitimate in upper-class society, had to be sold by their families to be a grant for the continuity of living.

Becoming mistresses or courtesans was the majority of the choice that was given to them. Some said it was more fortunate to be someone’s mistress than a courtesan, but for Joanna, there was nothing better than becoming someone’s legal wife.

However, no one knew what fate had in store for each life. No one could also choose which family they wanted to be born into. Being meddlesome enough to change one’s life was also, most of the time, not a good decision to make.

If she played a hero to save that young lady because of her empathy or because she thought that she faced a threat by becoming that man’s mistress or wife, what if she ruined what fate had for her—that she could actually have a good life with or through that man?

And what about the other ladies who experienced the same thing as her? Wasn’t it unfair if she did not help them as well while Erna’s situation was not the first experience she happened to encounter with?

Therefore, Joanna could only wish that that young lady would be really fine, as per what the General said to assure her and as she always wished for them to be every time she encountered that situation, because she actually did not know how to help them and she avoided being meddlesome in other people’s lives.

Stepping inside the carriage and taking a seat on the chair that she usually occupied, Joanna saw the man who just pulled the door closed casually take a seat next to her.

Joanna thought that he would move to take the seat where he was supposed to sit, which was across from her after that. However, instead of moving his seat, Joanna found him stare at her as if waiting for her reaction to push him away from her side and then ask him to take a seat across from her.

Nonetheless, at the very moment, Joanna did not have any desire to do what she was supposed to do if she wanted to keep her distance from the man who kept revolved around her.

Finding the situation that was faced by Erna, Joanna had imagined putting herself in her position. Without any meaning to not respect Erna’s situation, after a moment to ponder over her life, Joanna wanted to be grateful for having the life that was bestowed on her.

She was allowed to be born as de Lara. She had a dear father and brother. She was also legally married, which gave her the status of someone’s legal wife.

But then, that grateful feeling brought her back to the moment when the man who was staring at her, in the very same carriage, asked if she had ever once been grateful for having him as her husband.

It was a question that she could not answer at that time, not only to him but also to herself because she had never asked herself that, as avoiding his presence was the main thing she had put her focus on all this time.

Hence, she avoided giving him her response, and as a result of that distraction, she failed to get the agreement from him to not touch her, which ended up with her being embraced in his arms the whole night until dawn.

Then, was she grateful to have that stubborn man as her husband? Joanna pondered, and it did not take her too long to ponder how to answer the question because she actually knew the answer.

She knew the answer would be a definite yes if she had never experienced that dream. And it was a yes, if she had never seen the different version of him in the dream.

But then, after finding the answer to that question, the next question appeared in her mind. frёewebnoѵēl.com

How far would their relationship have gone if she had never experienced the dream?

Without the dream, she would have been likely to never leave his mansion and go back to Terra. She would have stayed in his mansion and met him a long time ago, after he returned from the battlefield.

Then, how could she see the way he pursued her as the way he was all this time? How could she see his tender gesture toward her? Would she still be able to see that in him if the dream had never come to her that night? What if she could not see that in him because there was nothing for him to fight for to maintain their marriage to begin with?

As there was nothing to fight for to begin with, how could she know how highly he valued their marriage? How could she know the meaning of the number eight that became his favorite number, which made him choose her as his wife? Would he reveal it to her even without her fleeing back to her homeland?

If that dream never appeared that night, would he stare at her with that intense, longing gaze, as he was doing all this time, including at the very moment?

If that dream never came to her that night, would she be grateful to have him as her husband? Joanna wondered in silence.