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The Werewolf King's Bride-Chapter 622: Fixation
(From Demian's Perspective)
It was stupid of me, now I understood. But to be honest, I wanted to feel the power I had. I knew I had more power than Mum and Father realized, or even me. I wanted to feel it all. I wanted to drown in the essence of the power I had.
Azure promised he would help me. He visited me in my dream and said he could help me more than Mum was willing to do.
"Your mother… well, she can help you. She certainly can. But will she?"
"Why won't she?" I had asked.
"Because she thinks you will be too greedy for power. But she doesn't realize that it is only natural for her to let you be greedy. That is what great dark mages do. They are greedy. If you don't have greed, you don't have power."
Somehow what Azure said made sense to me. I was greedy because I had the power to be greedy about. It was not like I was greedy about something I could not have.
Mum did not show me what power I had. She always said that my power was special, but never taught me how to use it. Well, she did teach me how to use my power, the normal power. But not up to my potential. I could do more. Much more. I knew it. How could I stay put when I knew that I could do something greater, much greater than what I was being introduced to?
If only Mum had taught me, showed me how to use my power properly and rise to my potential, I would not have to do this.
'You are just blaming your mother now for something that you have gotten both you and your mother into. You are being immature and that's why she never taught you what you can truly do with your power,' a voice inside my head said. I wanted to yell at it to shut up, but I was not crazy. Why would I talk to a voice inside my head? It was just my subconsciousness after all.
I was greedy for power. I was not ashamed of it. Why should I be? I wanted power. I craved it. Power was everything, after all.
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When I raised those dead back to life, I felt a rush of pleasure that nothing else could give me. I felt the want for more. More of that rush. More of that pleasure. I wanted to feel it again and again.
If I could use my full power, I could get that rush, but in stronger waves. That would be true euphoria.
I felt guilty though. Mostly because of the fact that Mum was brought into this because of me. Why could Azure not just teach me? I would give him what he wanted. Why did he need to bring my mother into this?
'Because he wants your mother. Regardless of your extraordinary power and of the fact that you have more mana than your mother, the one Azure truly wants is your mother. He needs her for something that none of you know as of yet.'
What could it be though? Why did he need Mum?
While I felt guilty about bringing Mum into this mess, I was also angry at her. She hid the fact that she drank blood from us, from me. She should have told me. I was a dark mage too. I had the right to know. What if I had to drink blood too? Should she not have told me to prepare myself beforehand?
I would not have known it either unless Azure mentioned it. I could not believe Mum kept such a big secret from me.
'You kept your power a secret too. You never told her that you can raise the dead.'
But that was different.
'How?'
I shook my head, trying to get rid of the thoughts. The voice inside my head seemed to question me, contradict me; it was as if my own subconsciousness did not agree with my way of doing things.
I needed to talk to Mum. I needed to ask her questions and I needed her to tell me the truth and not hide anything. I also needed to ask Azure what he wanted to do with my mother.
Regardless of what I wanted, I would never let him or anyone use my mother or hurt her. I would rather never be able to use my power. My mother was my everything. She kept secrets, sure, but I also kept secrets. I could forgive her for that. Besides, I wronged her too by putting her in danger. If something happened to her, I would never be able to forgive myself.
I opened the door of my chamber. There was no one guarding me. It was like Azure knew that I would not try to run away. Well, I basically came here on my own accord after all. Besides, he had my mother. I would not leave my mother and Azure knew that very well.
I heard a commotion coming from the other end of the corridor. I made my way there with quick steps. The door was locked from the inside, but I could hear my mother's voice from there.
"Do you have any idea what I had to go through with those three pregnancies? I almost had depression during the third pregnancy. I can't go through another pregnancy again. It's impossible. I can't do this!" Mum was yelling.
"If you don't do it, I don't I have to tell you what I will do," Azure said calmly. In fact, he sounded amused as well. It was as if he knew he had the upper hand here.
Mum let out a bitter laugh. "That's why you tricked Demian into coming here, didn't you? You made him believe things, you manipulated him, you made him go against his own parents. It's all because you wanted me here for some weird fixation and because you want me to do shit for you."
"I don't want you to do shit for you. I want you to give me a grandchild. It's a simple thing to ask for."
"Wow, you are not even denying anything!"
"Why would I when you are telling the right things?"