You Think I Won't Talk?-Chapter 101

[ WARNING: Mentions of Trauma/Abuse. Read at your Discretion ]

If only my deadpan expression could be seen... What a clown I am, acting like this.

Looking through the staring faces at me... I can even see an interrogation sign over their heads...

’I know! You don’t know what a thumbs-up means! But don’t look at me like that! I’m feeling very sensible right now, you d*mn inconsiderate people!!!’

Bewildered and ashamed of my action, I inwardly yelled at the four people looking at me. Slowly lowering my hand I nodded in the dead silence we all awkwardly created.

"... Ahem... Are you truly alright with this Marianne?"

"..."

’Sir... You... You are fighting your laughter right now, aren’t you?!! I will remember this!’

Upset at how the clearing of his throat showed his inner battle to hide his amazement, I pouted and glared at him as I took my post-it notes out of my dress’ inner pocket.

To make sure this issue was solved quickly, I began to write a clever message so it all could come to an end fast for these people to finally bring my meal once and for all.

I’m starving d*mn it.

[Father, I completely agree with this decision. The invitation has been postponed for a long time and I find it very disrespectful to keep our Empire’s rulers waiting for longer.

I feel much better knowing Theressa and Father will accompany me during this visit. It is indeed nerve-wracking to think I would be on my own at the Royal Palace. I sincerely appreciate your efforts to help me.

It only saddens me that I will have to be away from our home, where my Brother and Mother shall remain...]

Ugh... How sickening it is that I had no choice but to add that last bit...

Paul will most likely react badly to this — worst than he already is — and obviously, I’m taking the damage later. With this, his reaction might be appeased a little...

Sigh... Ef**ng hell... I’m not in good shape right now... Hopefully, he won’t be too rough.....

I drew the note over the table closer to where the Duke was seated and he promptly reached out for it.

He gave it a first read and smiled with resignation. Then, Marianne’s father turned his gaze from the message to me and asked for my permission to read it out loud to the other family members.

"... Dear, may I read this to your siblings and Mother?"

Receiving my Slight nodding to it, he began to read the note.

"... where my Brother and Mother shall remain..... As you heard, Marianne had agreed to this decision... However... I have yet to listen to my son’s opinion... Paul, do you agree to this?"

A short silence followed, one that made me shiver from its dangerous possible meaning. Soon, he spoke a short sentence with a seemingly calm voice... That was clearly... not a good sign.

"As long as Marianne is... Alright with it... I do not mind, Father."

It was his golden eyes that said it all to me... The fact that he spoke directly to the Duke his initial words... To then turn to me in a supposed leisurely movement to say the last bit... Confirmed that an annoying night was certainly coming.

Marianne’s body shuddered in fright, aware that his torture wouldn’t be a "nice" one. Although I shared her asphyxiating fear, my mind was clear as I usually do in front of danger. I’ve grown used to his games... And even survived the worst types of torture in my previous life...

I know well that... This guy might strain our body to some limits but... He won’t infringe upon us... Truly visible wounds.

At least not like he did with me... Not like he made me observe... and tolerate..... day after day, night after night..... Second by second..... Hah.

How disturbing... To think now I perceive Paul’s game as soft.... I truly am crazy sometimes...

I held his ominous gaze without showing my body’s true feelings and tried to portray in Marianne’s wavering eyes... The strength I’ve managed to survive with.

’My will won’t break this easily you bast***... If you think this game will end with your victory... You are dead wrong, Paul.’ — I told him while returning his stare.

And now, I must assure the scared one beside me.

Marianne... My tiny, cute, baby red panda...

’Sweetheart, be calm. This had to happen sooner or later... We will be alright. Because... I told you. I won’t let him hurt you any more than he already has... I will take all the pain..... So, focus on what I will return to you instead of what I’m taking, Anne.’

No matter what, I will return to her this suffering in the form of joy.

I’ll even multiply its intensity.

’Be calm Marianne. Don’t worry about me, sweetheart.... Someday you will understand why is it that I’m so sure when it comes to these things...’ — I said to the clearly unsettled girl, with a fond and warm grin. The uneasy sensation on our body’s stomach said it all about her concerns for me, and, the disbelief at my confidence, was sent with a kind of void sense of numbness in our head. Almost feeling as if the shock by my words and unusual composure in these situations was enough to make someone faint from the absurdity. 𝑓𝑟ℯ𝘦𝓌𝘦𝘣𝑛𝑜𝓋𝑒𝓁.𝑐ℴ𝓂

She had no time to react much again thanks to her Father, who spoke once again, this time, ending the Royal Palace’s visit matter and driving me out of the seriousness I had adopted to reassure Marianne.

"... I understand. It is fortunate that we have come to an agreement this fast. We shall prepare to depart on the 15th..." — The Duke said, glancing at every member of his family. — "... Shall we dine now?" — Ultimately, once his eyes rolled enough to meet our gaze, he said, displaying a nice and warm smile.

’That’s right Sir. We should eat already, I’m starving after all of this useless talk... I wonder what’s on the menu~ Heheh... I might order seconds for the dessert~’ — I coldly said at first, upset at how much I had to wait for him to finally call the food in. And as my thoughts started to imagine the soon-to-come meal, my mood rapidly began to cheer up.

Ah... The power of food... What a wonderful thing it is~

*******

The rest of the meal went just as if nothing had happened. Theressa was annoyingly lively and would start asking her mother to schedule their preparations to be done before we left and that they should contact every shop to come early this week since... Only ten days are left to go...

’What the heck? Why ten days again??...’

The Duke also announced my assistance to the Spring Ball ten days before... Does he like the number ten or something? I actually think is too little time to announce such important things... If I were him I would say it a month before.

I mean... Preparations for a Ball... Shouldn’t that take a while??? Is there something more I don’t know? Does the production time from seamstresses here take less for some reason???...

I wouldn’t be surprised if they did...

Anyways, I am back in our bedroom now. I’ve cleansed myself and now I’m waiting all prepared for the f***er.

’Sigh... I’m such a considerate victim... Even preparing and waiting for my abuser to come... How sad...’

He should hurry. I want to get over this quickly and sleep like a log. All my joints hurt... At least is not as strong yet... The flow, I mean...

’Sigh... What perfect timing...’

Hm? Wait... Maybe it Is a...

!!

No..... I shouldn’t assume he’s not as crazy as that guy...

Haaah... D*mn it, D*mn it!! Why!? Why did I have to remember that!!? Huk! Ugh!! I can’t, d*mn it!!!

At all costs... Uhk... I can’t let him know I’m on my period... I’m strong... But I won’t be able to take that... Not that...

I closed my eyes in deep pain by the clear flashbacks I got from those times. The humiliation... The helplessness..... His laughter as he played like a child happy to know... and touch... The wastes that flowed from my lower half.....those that proved I was a fully grown woman..... Sticky... All dirty... The floor that was my bed also dirty...

’Stop.’

He.... That debauched maniac...

— Haaah.....Even your blood’s scent... It’s delicious Eli~.... Huhuhu —

F*ck.

Why... so much time has passed.... But his voice is so maddeningly clear in my head...

It was all because of my period... That he began to do worst things... If he hadn’t seen my bleeding after the initial days after he caught me...

No....

Even if it had happened later... He would still...

"..." — Marianne’s silence made itself noticeable. She became concerned by the strong sensations my soul was calling upon our body.

’It’s alright, Anne... This despair I feel is not because... Of anything bad... I just... Remembered my family and got a little sad... Must be because of our period that I become a little sensible... Hahah...’

For the second time... I lied to Marianne, feigning a carefree laugh when I actually wanted to scream as I cry.