The Sorcerer's Handbook - Chapter 29: Ashe the Stowaway

“They Call Guys Like Me a Simp.”(Meanwhile, I’m out here living what their favorite MC only dreams about.)You ever notice how stories glorify the ones who feel nothing?The MC who never laughs.Never feels.Who plays women like chess pieces and calls it intelligence.He manipulates a girl? “He’s strategic.”He never opens up? “He’s mysterious.”He never flinches, never laughs, never lives —And you call that strength?Funny.Because to me?That’s just a prison in disguise.You see an “alpha.”I see a boy too scared to feel anything real.While they spend ten chapters monologuing about logic and sacrifice,I’m already making the Saintess scream,drenched in sin,halo cracked,legs trembling from truths her prayers never taught her.And I didn’t get there with cold eyes or control.I got there with laughter and chill. With warmth. With a grin and a hand on her thigh.I didn’t need to dominate her mind —I freed her heart.But that scares people, doesn’t it?Because readers trust the ones who suffer.Who stay quiet.Who kill without blinking and love without showing it.But me?I flirt.I laugh.I take hits and smile back, bloody and defiant, as if too weak to get angry.I don’t need to pretend emotions are weakness.I weaponize mine.Pleasure. Connection. Laughter.That’s my arsenal.And while your favorite MC is still calculating his next five moves,Trying to outwit death and romance like both are math problems,I’m already balls deep in the jade fairy — her sacred yin furnace clenching like it’s worshipping my shaft, her Dao Echo shattered into breathless moans, and her so-called cultivation path leaking down her thighs while she begs me to break her meridians again.You call that luck?Nah.That’s mastery of the three worlds.Because in a world that respects coldness,I came in hot.Where others manipulate, I connect.Where they posture, I play.Where they sacrifice, I seduce.So go ahead.Call me a simp.But while your genius MC is busy monologuing about destiny,I’m the one making goddesses question theirs —with a smirk, a touch, and no regrets.I’m not the hero.Not the villain.I’m just a simp… the kind who leaves your cold, emotionless MC’s woman dripping, ruined, and too stretched to go back to him.

I’m an imperial uncle; his imperial majesty’s uncle.

Once, someone with nothing better to do took a comprehensive survey of the current dynasty, and summed up the imperial court’s three great cancers.

Wang Qin leads in corruption; the treasury is never full.

Yun Tang favours a few, forming cabals; leading to corruption in our politics.

Prince Huai plays with power, and serves as the head of a hundred poisons — thus causing instability to the throne.

When they talk about the most venomous of vipers, the wicked one who plays with power, the biggest cancer of them all, they’re talking about me: this insignificant prince, Prince Huai, Chengjun.

I can only say that I feel rather hapless in the face of these theories.

In truth, I have been ever dutiful, ever devoted, devoid of intention to monopolise power, and possess even less of a heart to covet the throne. In the entire imperial court, I dare say there is no loyal subject more loyal than I.

But, most tragically, in all the realm, the matter of my being a loyal subject is something that not many would believe.

- Description from Novelupdates

In the second year of the apocalypse, Du Yue died alone, killed by apathy and exposure to extreme weather. Somehow, she opened her eyes to find herself not only alive, but also back when it was three months before the apocalypse. Despite the surprise, she thought about the upcoming disasters and upheavals. First, it was the fog that carried a virus that stayed for a month.

Then, global temperatures rose to over 120 degrees, evaporating most of the world’s water and melting all the icebergs. After that were level-10 earthquakes, cyclones, tsunamis, permanent eclipse, and avid rain… and that was not all, because after global warming, came global freezing. As temperatures dropped to below negative fifty, the savagery humans displayed was far worse than any imagined horrors like zombies! Knowing what was coming, Du Yue sold off her family property and used the pocket dimension her mother left her to hoard as many resources as possible, so that she could survive the apocalypse. Meat? Grain? Oil? Spices? Weather gear?

She bought everything! Steaks, French fries, spaghetti, and canned food must all be stocked up! To He Xing, the male lead, she was a god and the key to surviving the apocalypse! Having thought of the apocalypse, Du Yue sold off her family property and used the pocket dimension her mother left her to hoard as many resources as possible, so that she could survive the apocalypse. Meat? Grain? Oil? Spices? Weather gear? She bought everything! Steaks, french fries, spaghetti and canned food must all be stocked up! To He Xing, the male lead, she is a god and the key to surviving the apocalypse!

After dying in his previous life, Kaito Nakamura finds himself in a strange new world, free from the weight of past regrets. Surrounded by unfamiliar faces, he begins to carve out a new life, one filled with hope and the chance for personal growth. But as time passes, Kaito soon discovers that this world holds far more challenges than he ever imagined—challenges that test his resolve, his desires, and his understanding of what it means to truly live.In a world where loss is inevitable, Kaito is forced to confront the darkness that lingers within him and the painful sacrifices that come with seeking redemption. Will he be able to rise above the tragedies that define his existence, or will he become a victim of his own unresolved past?MC name: Kaito Nakamura. Age: 17.You can also join my discord, patreon or follow me on tiktok for more content, through my link tree: https://linktr.ee/Mr_MellmanThis story is authored by Mellman. I also publish under the names Mellmann and Mellman Nordberg.