Diary of a Masochist's turning into a Human Toilet-Chapter 6: EP.: Determination (18+)

EP.6: Determination

I was masturbating naked in the middle of the living room, as I often did. Initially, following videos was enough to excite me, but other SM videos featuring whipping or exposure no longer interested me. I craved stronger stimulation, so I closed my eyes and imagined various scenarios.

"Ah... Sir Jung-su... Master Jung-su... Please play with me more...

Ah... Sir Il-ho... I'm a perverted masochist..."

Jung-su had become my imaginary master. Their presence had deeply rooted itself in my mind.

I was on all fours, inserting my hand between my legs to stimulate myself. I enjoyed this destructive feeling, sometimes roughly penetrating myself.

However, after receiving the USB drive, I felt a growing sense of dissatisfaction each time I masturbated. I had experienced humiliation and shame beyond my imagination, and my body remembered that reality and fantasy were vastly different.

Jung-su's words echoed in my mind: "Follow your vagina and breasts, not your head." Suddenly, I thought of the address he had sent me.

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"No, absolutely not. Am I crazy?"

I startled myself by slapping my cheeks lightly to snap out of it. However, I couldn't shake off the dangerous thoughts and began rationalizing them.

"Maybe I should just go once and get it over with?"

From then on, I couldn't stop thinking about the address.

That night, I made up my mind while lightly touching myself. "Yes, follow my vagina..."

I didn't realize how much regret this foolish decision would bring.

The next morning, I was filled with doubts. They had given me the address but hadn't specified when to come.

"What if no one is there? If I go after school, it might be too late... and what if they don't come home right after school?"

I decided to go on the weekend. "I'll go on Saturday. I should arrive early, around 11 AM."

It was Thursday, so it would be the day after tomorrow. Once I had made up my mind, my heart swelled with anticipation.

Saturday, 9 AM

I woke up early, feeling excited and nervous. I had a simple breakfast and started getting ready, determined to look as pretty as possible.

I used waterproof makeup to prevent it from smudging like last time. My hair was long and straight, but I added some volume with a hair straightener.

I didn't wear any underwear and chose a light blue dress that was easy to remove and suitable for the warm weather. Unlike the previous time when I wore black to impress my brother's friends, this time I opted for a more innocent and elegant look with lace details, hoping to impress Jung-su.

When I looked in the mirror, I felt radiant and beautiful.

After finishing my makeup, it was already past 10 AM. I left the house to avoid being late, and my brother was preparing to go to the library.

We lived about 20 minutes from the city by car, and the address was also in the city, so we headed to catch the bus together. My brother's library was in the same direction.

As we walked, my brother asked, "Where are you going today?"

I smiled casually and said, "I'm just going out for some fresh air. I've been stuck at home lately."

My brother complimented me, saying, "You look really pretty today."

We didn't say much else until he got off the bus.

I kept my destination a secret from him, fearing it might irreparably damage our relationship.

I got lost for a while but eventually found the address. The area was mostly bars and karaoke rooms, which were closed, making it very quiet.

I checked the address again on my phone and confirmed it was a run-down villa basement apartment.

I slowly descended the dark stairs, feeling like I was entering darkness.

I checked the door number and looked back at the stairs, where sunlight was shining in.

My heart was racing as I hesitated to ring the doorbell. I listened at the door but heard nothing except my own heartbeat.

I took a deep breath and rang the bell.

The door opened, and a girl with a sharp voice and piercing eyes appeared. She was wearing a white T-shirt with a tattoo on her collarbone.

I was taken aback and asked if it was Jung-su's house. The girl exclaimed, "Jung-su oppa! A really pretty auntie is looking for you!"

When I didn't respond, she asked who I was. I blushed and stuttered, "I'm Han-young's sister..."

The girl slammed the door shut.

I waited anxiously, wondering what was happening. The door opened again, and the girl asked why I had come.

I forgot all my rehearsed lines and stuttered, "I... I came because... my vagina... wants to be torn apart..."

The girl looked at me with a puzzled expression.

I repeated myself, feeling embarrassed and unable to lift my head.

The girl burst into laughter and opened the door wide.

As the door opened, I saw Jung-su coming out of the room. I was thrilled to see him again.

Il-ho followed, greeting me with a smirk. "Hey, perverted slut, you really came!"

Jung-su approached me, his expression unchanged.

I greeted him nervously, feeling intimidated.

"Coming here means you have the determination, right?" he asked.

I nodded, using polite language due to his authoritative tone.

Jung-su looked me up and down, and I straightened my posture, clasping my hands together.

"You're still pretending to be human, despite being a perverted toy. Go to the fire hydrant and change into something more fitting."

The door closed, and I was left standing there.

I opened the fire hydrant and found a red dog collar with a bell inside. I realized the meaning behind Jung-su's words and felt foolish for thinking I could impress him with my appearance.

I took a deep breath, noticing the warm sunlight and the opportunity to leave. I closed my eyes for a moment to calm my racing heart and steel myself.