Eighteen's Bed-Chapter 23.7

“At this size, it can hold your weight. Don’t struggle.”

If only you hadn’t lifted me. My protest was swallowed again by Go Yohan’s mouth. I was struggling in the narrow pit, my rear crammed in, while Go Yohan easily slid off my wet pants. The drenched fabric clung to my body, but he yanked it painfully. The tight material scraped painfully against my buttocks and thighs as it slid down and eventually hit the floor.

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Shit. I bit my lip and bowed my head.

The only thing properly clothed was my upper body; my legs, bare, dangled out of the sink as reflected in the mirror opposite me.

“Please, just let me down.”

Tears welled up from embarrassment. Yet Go Yohan, breathing heavily against my forehead, merely lifted my chin and resumed his devouring of my lips. My neck arched back, the tap poking my back, my hands finding nothing but Go Yohan’s clothes to desperately cling to.

“Just wait.”

“…”

“I’ll let you down in a bit.”

Not even looking into my eyes, but staring as if he could see through my lips, Go Yohan placed his palm on the mirror. His body pressed me even tighter against him. The mirror fogged up following the shape of his hand.

His remaining hand trailed down my stomach and barely missed my genitals. At that moment, I tensed my waist and stiffened my body. But that damned finger slid deeper, past the thin skin I’d touch during my own self-pleasure, to a spot I’d never touched before. His finger roughly probed between the tightly clenched flesh.

“Damn, you're tight.”

“Hey, stop. Take it out, you bastard. Why are you…”

I managed to move my left hand to touch the mirror behind me, and with my remaining arm, I pushed Go Yohan’s right arm. However, unmoved, Go Yohan only delved deeper, scraping at the tender flesh.

“You really… why are you so smooth down here?”

I pushed hard against Go Yohan’s forearm, squinting and curling my lips inside my mouth. It was futile, though. The thumb firmly anchoring below my rear and the forefinger freely poking deeper drove me insane, but the remaining three fingers, clumsily pressed and futilely moving, made me even crazier. Go Yohan bent his head to seek my lips, but I desperately hid them.

“This is okay, right? Hmm? I’ll make your lips red.”

“Get lost… please!”

“Jun, I’m not even putting it in.”

Go Yohan spoke slowly. However, there was anxiety in his breath. I struggled to turn my head, avoiding Go Yohan’s kiss.

“…”

“…Jun.”

Go Yohan’s lips grazed just below my ear. The hot touch smeared on the tender skin. He moved up along my cheek, but I exerted more strength in my arm to push him away. The hot touch barely moved away from my cheek.

“Why are you doing this?”

“Don’t.”

Sometimes, people have a gut feeling without reason, like I anticipated Go Yohan would torment me that day. Just as I felt a moment ago.

Today, Go Yohan will do it.

I needed time to understand what was about to happen to me. To accept it. I used all my strength to buy that time, my arms trembling as if in spasm. Blue veins appeared on the back of my hand holding onto Go Yohan’s arm. It was all I could do to resist. Go Yohan, barely paused, pushed deeper not to be pushed away. We could feel each other’s strength tensely. Go Yohan’s neck stretched out to kiss me, revealing the tender line, pulling at his shirt in my grip, baring his skin.

“Ugh…”

I was pushing him away with all my might, but Go Yohan only looked at my lips and body, pushing his head closer. His eyelids slightly lifted, revealing a faint double eyelid. Go Yohan’s eyes usually have double eyelids, but they appear more pronounced when he’s tired or lifting his eyelids. At such times, the color of his iris seems particularly lighter. I saw myself reflected in them. My pathetic, trembling self. Go Yohan reluctantly met my eyes.

“…Please, okay?”

Don’t be fooled. He’s going to do it. Today, he will definitely do it. The melted look in Go Yohan’s eyes told me. He will spread it, probe it, and cram in something unimaginably big until it’s nearly killing me. The moment our eyes met, I inhaled deeply and pushed harder.

“Ah!”

Regrettably, I exerted too much force, and my muscles gave out. I tried to push with my bent elbow again, but Go Yohan had already come too close. My hand slipped, desperately grabbing at anything, fiercely pulling at the caught fabric. The collar of the shirt stretched as if it would tear.

“Jun.”

His hot breath touched my skin, sending shivers through my body. The trembling of Go Yohan, trying to kiss my forcibly turned head, was palpable. One step bigger, Go Yohan caught the center of my exposed self in one go.

“Ah, ah!”

My head felt like it was going to burst.

“Uh!”

A short moan burst through my clenched teeth, filling the small, heated space with an embarrassing sound. Reflexively, I raised my hand that had been supporting me and covered my mouth. It was a mistake. With no arm to support my body, I was pushed back and trapped within the wall that was Go Yohan, his clothes inadvertently becoming my safety harness.

"Jun, pretending you don't enjoy this hurts me."

His damp lips clung to my cheek and he grinned roughly, then flicked my erect penis. A nasal groan leaked between my closed lips, and the heat from my eyes burst uncontrollably.

Covering my mouth with my hand, I painfully looked down. My penis, now flushed red, twitched and dripped clear liquid just below my navel. The liquid pooled in my navel, a viscous and clear fluid that overflowed and dripped down towards the sink.

"When you're excited..."

Three stiff fingers. It seems he thought he couldn't do much with that hand. Go Yohan frowned and, using his index finger, twisted the tip of my penis and blocked the small opening with his thumb.

"Damn, you useless fucker."

"..."

"You can't do anything right. Damn."

Go Yohan gritted his teeth and resentfully looked down at his own hand. He wouldn't know how much more it felt like dying when he pressed and rubbed with his thumb. He wouldn’t understand how much more painful it was to curse while resenting his own fingers. He shouldn't know.

"..."

The moan trying to escape was stifled by the hand I twisted so tightly, but my body, reacting to the excitement, involuntarily twisted at the waist. Tears flowed, wetting my cheeks and dripping down my fingers. An itching, cold sensation dripped under my palms.

My penis, already wet and throbbing with arousal, seemed about to burst with any more stimulation. Even Go Yohan’s clumsy fingers were too much of a stimulus. Every touch brought a stinging sensation up my veins. The hard thumb circled, pressed, and gently scratched around the tip, making my hips twist, my feet curl inward, and my toes clench.

Watching his own hand and cursing, Go Yohan soon found interest in my reaction and his eyes sparkled. He now looked up at my face, tormenting the reddened tip mercilessly.

"Jun, do you think you're going to come?"

Would I say that, you asshole? I desperately shook my head. Go Yohan imitated my gesture and then sighed pitifully.

"Should I suck it like before?"

I shook my head harder. So hard that my head hit the mirror I was leaning against. But I didn't feel the pain. Go Yohan, tracking my pitiful appearance intently, lowered his eyebrows and spoke with a strangely rough breath.

"I’m sorry my hand is useless and can't do anything right."

His pitying gaze, his breaths searching obsessively for my lips, the rough heartbeat through the cloth I grasped, and the harsh stimulation at the tip of my penis had already turned me into a non-rational being.

Go Yohan, who had been mercilessly pinching the tip with his thumb and forefinger, suddenly spread the small opening like he was pressing down on the end with his thumb. It was truly an unexpected moment.

"…!"

A metallic sound forced its way through my sealed lips. Waves of pleasure surged up my nerves instantly. The fluid gathered in my lower abdomen ballooned and trembled dangerously, and then, as Go Yohan's hard fingertips flicked it sharply, the thin membrane burst.

Ah, ah, ah…

My body trembled, and white liquid dropped in vibrations, spattering Go Yohan's wrist and forearm, dirtying my clothes. My thoughts cleared. Tears filled my blurred vision as Go Yohan, incredulous, alternated his gaze between his right hand and my penis dribbling semen.

"Did you really come from that?"

His tone incredulous as if it was utterly unbelievable. The face reflected in the mirror opposite was flushed and hideously drenched with tears. I was on the verge of dying from embarrassment, so I gave up everything and covered my face with my forearm.

"Jun, are you crying?"

"…Move."

"You cry when you're excited. You never cry otherwise, even when you feel utterly wronged."

Shielded by my forearm, I couldn't see Go Yohan's expression. But it was clear that Go Yohan was exhilarated.

"Damn, there's not one thing about you that isn't arousing. Even Kang Jun ends up crying only after sex."

"…Please, shut up."

"Do you cry when you masturbate, too? Do you come crying then?"

"Just stop…!"

I wanted to die. How could he know I cry when I'm aroused? I've never gone this far comforting myself alone. What the fuck, where does such a shitty reflex come from? Even the sound of my voice was annoyingly tearful. So, I clamped my mouth shut, then suddenly, Go Yohan's hand grabbed my waist.

His hand firmly gripped my waist and lifted my body up in an instant, and my body, jerked forward, collided with Go Yohan's chest. He then lifted me, who had been struggling with only my butt stuck in the sink. Surprised, I grabbed Go Yohan's shoulders.

"Hey, what are you doing…!"

"You asked to be lifted."

Then he straightened his neck to look at the sink and muttered to himself.

"Wow, this is useful."

Go Yohan pressed down on the sink as if it were fascinating. I took the opportunity to stretch my legs down to touch the floor, but once I relaxed, my body couldn't find support and tilted. Just as I was about to scream, Go Yohan caught me.

Our chests touched. Two heartbeats intertwined, causing chaos. Go Yohan still smelled of fabric softener, or maybe soap. The white T-shirt and Go Yohan's scent were enticing. Even if the collar was stretched or mixed with air freshener, its charm wasn't reduced.

Go Yohan's body temperature was high. His face seemed like a midwinter ground fiercely frozen after a thaw. Yet it should be the same 36.5 degrees Celsius, so why does Go Yohan feel so hot?

"…"

I put strength back into my wavering legs and planted my feet on the floor as naturally as possible while trying to detach the hand wrapped around my back. But Go Yohan lifted his hand first and wiped my cheek.

"You're becoming like a blown dumpling."

"Leave me alone."

In a burst of embarrassment, I pushed Go Yohan away irritably. Then, suddenly realizing, I placed my hand on the cheek he had caressed.

"..."

It was as I expected. Removing my hand, I turned my head and a string of white liquid stretched from my cheek to my hand before breaking. My mind grew hazy. More overt was what happened between my thighs; the sensation of an unpleasant liquid dropping like beads was acutely felt.

"It's a masterpiece, a spectacle."

Go Yohan was looking at my disheveled state with a satisfied expression. There I was, semen smeared all over my face and hand, standing dumbfounded. The insults boiled up from my navel to my vocal cords, but I held them in. Yes, even if it's disgusting, it was my doing. My semen. I decided to take responsibility.

"I'm going to wash up..."

Hesitating over each word was not an option. Suppressing the emotions that surged while I faced Go Yohan's sneering, disdainful laughter and the residue I loathed to even hold in my hand.

"…just leave, please."

It was incredibly embarrassing to be standing here in just an upper garment. But saying more would make me look even worse, and bending down to pick up my trousers seemed too risky. I had no choice but to stand tall as if unfazed.

However, Go Yohan has never listened to me. One of his long fingers crept below my navel, hooking the hem of my T-shirt and lifting it, grazing my stomach.

At first, I didn't realize what was happening. The face in front of me seemed unconcerned. When the finger reached my sternum, I hastily stepped back.

"What are you really doing?"

"Jun."

Go Yohan's gaze still lingered below. His eyes, with their slender lines, sparkled with interest. I can assert that. Those eyes had been half-crazed since he entered the bathroom. Maybe they had been off from the front door.

"You're erect again."

"…"

"You're healthy."

...Damn it. I pulled my T-shirt down further, my face already flushed to bursting. I deliberately ignored the full-body mirror opposite that continued to reflect my shameful state. My hair was wet, and with semen smeared on my face, wearing just one T-shirt, my face burned red. That pitiful human being was none other than Kang Jun.

"Go away."

I said this with all the force I could muster. It was a pathetic retreat, but I had to do it as anxiety had been screaming at me for a while. Go Yohan was surely going to cross the line.

He took one more step. I stepped back, but our steps were mismatched. The gaze at 4 a.m. was the darkest, filling my vision instantly. When I came to, the world had already turned upside down. My hands couldn't defend because I was busy pulling down the T-shirt.

"Go Yohan!"

I screamed, but it was futile. Twisting my body and shaking my legs did nothing. In a rage, I hit Go Yohan's back.

I'm a man too, a proper man. I thought at least this much wouldn't happen. Even though Go Yohan had easily smashed that muscle pig, Kim Minho, like handling a child, I hadn't expected this. According to Go Yohan, I might be a bit tall, but my resistance had no impact. It was so absurd that it caused me to burst into cynical laughter. In a flash of lucidity, I shouted.

"Let go, Go Yohan!"

Go Yohan didn't respond. He just kicked and opened the bathroom door. When Go Yohan lifted his leg, his notably bony shoulder felt like it was stabbing my stomach. It was almost crushing. Breathing was difficult, and my posture was unstable. Damn it, I felt my blood rushing to my head as I quickly grabbed Go Yohan's shirt, trying to right myself.

"Damn it..."

I was actually taller than average. I clenched my teeth and held onto his shirt. It was then.

"..."

Go Yohan's twisted back hit my nose. And my struggles suddenly stopped.

Go Yohan dislikes being seen naked. He is extremely sensitive about showing his body. Even during our first physical encounter on the couch, Go Yohan didn't undress. Not his trousers, not his shirt.

After several surgeries, his back had regained its original form, but the twisted mosaic-like skin was not something anyone would find aesthetically pleasing.

"Ah..."

I let go of the T-shirt I had been holding. My body, draped over his shoulder, was being dragged along, and I had completely forgotten that I was being used to satisfy Go Yohan's lust. I was just lost in the traces caught in my eyes. Just as I was about to gently touch the distorted skin, the world flipped again.

"Ugh!"

But the place I fell was soft. I looked up to see a familiar place.

It was Go Yohan's bed.

Looking up, I saw the protagonist taking heavy breaths above me.

"Yo, Yohan."

"..."

It wasn't the time to be embarrassed about exposing parts that shouldn't be shown to others, or the bashfulness of the situation. Go Yohan slightly bowed his head and swallowed hard with difficulty. Then he seemed to be suppressing something as he firmly grasped his left thigh and groaned.

"I'm sorry, Jun."

"..."

"...Damn, fuck."