I Reincarnated to Another World as a Woman-Chapter 228: Freedom to Choose

Shadow Theo smiles.

Genuine. Sincere.

"Free. It’s such a beautiful word, isn’t it?"

He twirls on his heel, arms loose, almost playful, like the weight of the world does not touch him.

"Free!"

He stops abruptly and points one finger straight at Theo.

"You want to be free."

He nods once. Slow. Thoughtful.

"I understand. And I agree."

Then his expression shifts. The smile fades, replaced by something sharper, heavier. Serious.

"From what?"

The words hang in the empty space between them.

"Do you know, Theo?"

Theo blinks several times. His heart begins to pound faster, louder in his ears. He swallows dry saliva. His lips twitch, the beginnings of a reply forming and dying before it can escape. His breathing turns ragged.

"From... I don’t..." He shakes his head slightly. "I don’t understand your question."

His gaze drifts away, anywhere but Shadow Theo.

"Ah." Shadow Theo tilts his head, studying him with unsettling familiarity. "That’s unfortunate."

He takes a slow step closer.

"But you do, Theo. I know you do." His voice softens. "I am you."

Theo’s jaw tightens.

"Then why do you ask?" Theo snaps, frustration boiling over. "If you already know everything, why do you ask?!"

His voice rises with every word, cracking with pressure he has kept buried for far too long.

Shadow Theo scoffs.

He points a finger at himself.

"I do know everything. And I believe I know the answer."

Then he turns that same finger toward Theo, stabbing the air between them.

"But do you?"

Theo’s chest heaves.

"What do you want?!" he shouts.

"I don’t understand why I have to say it," Theo yells, the words tearing out of him, "when you already know the answer!" 𝗳𝚛𝗲𝕖𝕨𝕖𝗯𝚗𝚘𝕧𝕖𝗹.𝗰𝗼𝕞

"I want you to say it." Shadow Theo replies calmly.

The contrast is brutal.

"WHY?!" Theo screams at the top of his lungs.

Shadow Theo does not flinch. Not even a little.

"Are you too arrogant to answer it?"

He steps closer, invading Theo’s space, lips curling into a sharp, taunting sneer.

"Or are you too much of a coward to admit it?"

"You—!" Theo lunges forward, fist clenched, instinct screaming for violence, for release.

Shadow Theo’s sneer widens.

"What?" he asks lightly. "You want to strike me?"

He spreads his arms wide, exposing himself completely.

"Go ahead. Strike. Attack."

His smile turns cruel.

"Let’s see what happens when you strike yourself."

He takes a deliberate step back, feet planted firmly on the invisible floor.

"I’m right here."

He tilts his head up and closes his eyes.

Waiting.

Taunting.

"Aaaaarrrgghh!"

Theo yells into the empty sky, his voice tearing out of him, raw and cracked.

There is no echo. No answer.

"Argh!" He screams again, louder, harsher, like he’s trying to rip something out of his chest.

His legs finally give way.

He pants heavily, air dragging painfully into his lungs, chest heaving like it’s forgotten how to breathe properly.

Then it hits him.

He sobs.

Tears spill freely from his eyes, hot and relentless. He crouches down, folding into himself, arms wrapping tight around his own body as if that is the only thing keeping him from breaking apart completely.

His shoulders shake violently.

His sobs are loud, ugly, uncontrolled.

Theo completely breaks down.

For a long moment, there is nothing but the sound of him crying in the void.

Shadow Theo still says nothing.

He moves closer and crouches down beside him, mirroring his posture.

Silent.

Waiting.

------------------------------

Time passes. Or maybe it doesn’t.

Theo doesn’t know.

Eventually, the violent sobbing fades into broken, hitching breaths. His chest still trembles, his throat burns, but the storm inside him has lost its force.

"I want..." Theo whispers, his voice hoarse.

He swallows hard.

"I want to have the freedom to choose," he says again, louder this time, as if saying it once wasn’t enough.

"I want to choose the life I want to live."

His hands curl into fists against the ground.

"I don’t want to live as someone else."

The words crack him open again.

Theo wails, the sound torn straight from his chest. He lifts his head and looks directly at Shadow Theo, eyes red, wet, desperate.

"But how can I do that?" he cries.

"I didn’t choose to come to Altheon. I didn’t. I really didn’t."

His voice breaks.

"But then I ended up living again," he continues, anger and despair tangled together.

"And why do I have to live in someone else’s body?"

His breathing turns erratic.

"Why can’t I just be me?!"

His strength finally leaves him.

Theo collapses onto the floor, landing heavily on his side before slumping forward. His shoulders sag, his arms fall limp at his sides, his body folding inward like it has nothing left to give.

He looks up at Shadow Theo, eyes unfocused, tears still streaming freely down his face. He doesn’t bother wiping them away.

"Help me," he cries.

"Help me!"

Shadow Theo lowers himself fully to the ground beside him.

"Do you hate Rhaenas?" he asks quietly.

"Do you hate Mama Montrose? Papa Montrose?"

He continues, voice steady, relentless.

"Claudia. Miranda. Linus. All of them."

"Do you hate them?"

Theo doesn’t answer.

"Why did you insist on saving them," Shadow Theo presses,

"and lock yourself inside the dungeon?"

He tilts his head slightly.

"Do you really value your life less than others’?"

The questions come one after another, piling weight onto Theo’s chest.

Shadow Theo raises his hand. A handkerchief appears between his fingers, as if pulled from nothing. He gently wipes the tears from Theo’s face, unhurried, careful.

"If you could do it again," he asks softly,

"would you make the same choices?"

He pauses.

Then, even more gently:

Do you not want your second life?"

"Do you regret it?"

Theo tries to answer through his sobs, breath hitching, chest rising and falling unevenly. For a moment, no sound comes out. Then he shakes his head.

"I don’t hate them," Theo says slowly, as if choosing each word costs him something.

He swallows hard.

"Papa Maurice... I respect him." His voice cracks, but he keeps going.

"Mama Leila, she..." He stops, presses his lips together, then continues.

"She gives me the real love of a mother."

Tears spill faster, but he does not stop speaking.

"Claudia, Miranda, Linus," he says, listing the names like anchors,

"they are another family. One that I admire. One that I’ve come to respect."

He sniffles, wiping his nose with the back of his hand.

"Rhaenas..." His voice steadies, surprising even himself.

"Rhaenas gave me a purpose in this life."

His shoulders rise as he inhales. His words no longer shake as badly.

Shadow Theo smiles faintly. "Go on," he says, nudging him gently, not physically but with presence.

"I..." Theo hesitates.

"I saved them and locked myself inside because..."

His expression crumples. His voice drops.

"I knew... No." He swallows.

"I thought I knew that I could survive."

He looks up at Shadow Theo with wide, raw eyes, suddenly looking younger. Smaller.

"I was too arrogant, wasn’t I?"

Shadow Theo does not answer. He only watches him, unblinking, unwavering.

Theo exhales shakily. He sniffles again.

"That didn’t answer your question," he admits quietly.

He takes a deep breath, slower this time, forcing himself to steady.

Tears continue to fall, but his voice is clear when he speaks again.

"I saved them because I didn’t want them to be hurt."

"I cared about them. More than my own life."

He lifts his head fully now.

"If I could do it again," Theo says, firm despite the tears,

"I would make the same choices."

His gaze does not waver.

Shadow Theo smiles and helps him to his feet.

"You still haven’t answered the question," he says softly. "Free from what?"

Theo meets his eyes. Steady now. Grounded. The tears are still there, but they no longer control him.

"Freedom from the guilt," Theo says.

He swallows.

"Freedom from feeling guilty that I was given a second chance... while the rest of Caelthorn never were."