Re:life with Karmic Gacha (Modern Family)-Chapter 359: Politics

[Edward POV]

Inside my recording studio at home, which was built in one of the detached houses— a dance studio on the bottom floor and the recording studio on top—Vanessa practiced her vocals in the soundproof room while I worked on the song with the synthesizer.

She wore a white crop top, a short plaid skirt, and leggings, tying her hair into a double bun.

"Brrr~~ Ahh~ AHH~ SHALALA~ UM! I think I'm ready." She gave me a thumbs up as she put on her headphones.

I pressed the red intercom button to talk to her. "Good, we'll start from the beginning."

The recording session went smoothly, and it took only three hours to finish the entire song.

"Ah! I'm starving!" Vanessa whined as she exited the soundproof room.

"How about I cook some lunch? Now that we've finished your request, we can spend the entire evening together."

Vanessa widened her eyes and gasped. "Don't try to subtly change the terms of your penalty. I'm not the one who decided to create a new song this morning when I woke up."

"Damn it. You saw through that, huh?" I said with a playful grumble. Vanessa smirked and hugged my arm, pressing her body close. "Are you really that scared? Should I be lenient and let you off easy?"

"If someone overheard you, they might think the penalty is pegging. Not that I have any problem with that, just give me some time to prepare—"

Vanessa suddenly bit my shoulder as I teased her. "Oww! Alright, you're really hungry. We should go eat first."

We had lunch next to the garden, underneath the shade, while I watched Vader play with a squirrel. With starry eyes, Vanessa snapped multiple pictures of Vader, overwhelmed by his cuteness, all while munching on her fried chicken drumstick.

"I'll set up the music video production for tomorrow. We should be able to finish shooting it in a day if nothing goes wrong," I told Vanessa after finishing my call with Randall.

"Should I cut my hair?" she asked casually as she stood up from squatting on the grass.

"Why would you cut your hair?" I asked, confused.

"So, you like girls with long hair?" She grinned and walked back to her seat, acting coy as she opened a can of beer. I glanced at the can and saw it was my brand of beer, "Forgefire."

"Oh, so you're trying to 'gotcha' me?" I opened another can of beer.

She twirled her hair. "I just want to get to know you—what you like and dislike—"

"I like you." I interjected before she could finish. Vanessa inhaled deeply, taken aback by my sudden confession, and her face flushed slightly.

"Hmm..." She giggled happily and asked, "Do you like me with short hair or long hair?"

I sighed inwardly, knowing her question wouldn't be easy to answer. If I said I preferred long hair, she might cut it short just to see if I'd still like her that way. Although I wasn't sure if she would do that, I had similar experiences before and didn't want to risk it.

"Hmm, I never really thought about it before. I'd have to check and see first," I said casually.

Vanessa quickly untied her hair, letting it flow freely. "This is what it looks like with long hair, and..." She folded her hair in half and hid the top with her hand, trying to show me what she would look like with a bob cut. "...This is what I'd look like if it were shorter."

"I still don't see it. Why don't you come closer?" I placed my finger under my chin, pretending to scrutinize her appearance. Vanessa excitedly walked over and sat next to me. "This is—"

Before she could finish, I kissed her on the lips. Vanessa was stunned and immediately looked around anxiously. "What are you doing? Are you crazy? What if there are paparazzi stalking us?"

"We could even have sex out here and no one would know. My security is more advanced than the U.S. military base, you know?" I said, grabbing her hand and kissing it.

Vanessa bit her lower lip, tempted, but quickly shook her head as she fought off those thoughts. She slapped my hand away and said, "I'm being serious! I think it's time for me to change my image."

"Hmm, that might not be a bad idea," I finally took her seriously. "You've had long, wavy brunette hair forever. Instead of cutting it, why not change the color?"

Vanessa's eyes lit up as she embraced the suggestion. "I always wanted to do something like Enid, with two-tone highlights—um, but I don't think it would work well with my skin tone."

I stifled a laugh at her immediate change in enthusiasm and said, "You're incredibly pretty, so I'm sure you'll make it work. Do you want me to visualize it on my computer so you can see how it might look?"

Vanessa eagerly agreed to the suggestion. We spent some time chatting and having fun until it was almost 3 PM. Suddenly, she stood up and declared, "We need to get ready now. Time's up, Newgate; you need to pay the price."

"If I give you 10 million dollars, can I escape my penalty?" I asked, flashing my best puppy-dog eyes. I wrapped my arms around her waist and rested my cheek against her abdomen, trying to appear pathetic, but Vanessa was merciless.

She smirked and said, "If you do that, then I might be open-minded about the cosplay thing—"

"Let's do it!" I stood up abruptly and took the lead to head inside the house. Vanessa laughed and allowed herself to be dragged along as we went to get ready. We playfully goofed around a bit, which resulted in us needing to change our clothes.

After getting ready for the second time, we hopped into my blue Maserati and drove straight to the event venue.

The reception area turned chaotic as I exited the car and then escorted Vanessa out like a true gentleman. Even the organizers seemed surprised that we had shown up at the event, although my name was on the guest list.

"It will be fun to meet the President again," I whispered to Vanessa as we arrived at George Clooney's fundraising event for the Democratic Party, aimed at raising campaign funds for President Obama's reelection.

Celebrities like RDJ, James Brolin, Tobey Maguire, Jack Black, and many others were in attendance, along with high-profile figures such as fashion CEOs, the Mayor of Los Angeles—Antonio Villaraigosa—and the Attorney General.

For some reason, representatives from tech companies were notably absent, leaving me as the sole tech presence at the event. The table wasn't free; it cost $40,000 per seat, and the event was held in a tent set up inside George Clooney's basketball court.

The event was mind-numbingly dull. I found myself sitting at a random table with Vanessa instead of people I knew, sharing space with the Attorney General and the Mayor, which astonished many other guests.

"Howard, how are your wife and kids?" I greeted the Attorney General with a cheeky smile. "Has she managed to get rid of the headaches?"

"Yes, after changing her diet—which just meant drinking less—she doesn't have frequent headaches anymore," the plump middle-aged man replied, clearly pleased.

"Ah, I guess that's still a bad thing for her. Now she has no excuses left," I teased, and Howard chuckled, his face turning a shade redder.

As I cozied up to the Mayor, I noticed Vanessa looking at me with a bewildered expression.

"Didn't you say you didn't want to come? Why are you so chummy with them?" she whispered while everyone focused on George Clooney's speech.

"One thing you have to know about me is that I'm a chameleon. Even if I really don't want to do something, I'll put on a good face to survive," I whispered back.

Vanessa furrowed her brows, and I chuckled, finding it adorable.

"Stop being suspicious," I said gently, playfully tugging her eyebrows down with my fingers—an act that caught the attention of photographers.

After his tedious speech, the President made his way to our table. As soon as he reached us, he remarked, "Edward, it'd be better if you just yawned. I almost laughed when I saw you holding it back while I was speaking."

Taken aback, I smirked and replied playfully, "You saw that, huh? Don't get me wrong; it's a great speech, but I've heard it before."

Obama laughed heartily, while I noticed Vanessa felt a bit out of place among the country's most influential figures.

I teased her slightly, "I guess you're regretting it now, huh? Cashing in your bet for this, and the worst part is that it's not even your wish."

Vanessa widened her eyes in shock. "You knew?"

"That Pepper would pull something like this? Of course I did." I leaned in and whispered to her, "I won't consider this your prize; think of something else. I'll settle the bill with Pepper later."

Vanessa blushed, feeling a ticklish sensation as I whispered in her ear. freeweɓnovēl.coɱ

We enjoyed food prepared by Wolfgang Puck, though I still felt my cooking was superior. I handed out some gifts to the President, the Mayor, the Attorney General, and several other VVIPs—a bottle of Euphoria, a rare brand of alcohol so exclusive that people were clamoring to get it.

As the guests began to mingle after dinner, I bumped into RDJ. While many people wanted to speak with the President, I was on their list too. I kept steering away from the people I found exhausting and exploitative, only meeting with those with a good reputation.

The fundraiser raised 15 million dollars for the reelection campaign. To be honest, with the President's current popularity, he would have no problem winning the next election.

"Edward!" Emma Stone exclaimed with delight when she saw me. She excitedly jogged in her high heels and gave me a bear hug. "Ness!" Emma embraced Vanessa as well upon noticing her.

"Oh my god, what did you do? How did you end up at the VVIP table?" Emma asked, clearly surprised by my unexpected seating arrangement. She was blonde, having just wrapped up shooting for The Amazing Spider-Man.

"I'm just that important—practically irreplaceable to the country. The President wants to talk to me about reducing the unemployment rate. Although he's managed to push it down to 2%, he's still not satisfied."

Vanessa interjected, exposing me, "They talked about alcohol. Didn't even touch that topic. Don't believe him."

"You know what? I never did," Emma playfully replied, giving me a side-eye before the two of them giggled together.

During the shooting of Draculein, Emma and I had grown quite close. I admired her acting talent and positivity; Andrew Garfield was right—she was like a shot of espresso in the morning.

Of course, she could also be a bit unhinged. I saved her contact as "Emma Stoned," because her antics often resembled someone under the influence, even when she was perfectly sober.

Our publicity tour for the movie was legendary. We joked around with each other constantly and exhibited an undeniable chemistry that led to rampant rumors swirling about us dating. However, the truth was that we were just really great friends—nothing more, nothing less.

"By the way, I heard you bought Universal Studios? When did that happen?" Emma asked with a mix of disbelief and curiosity.

I grimaced at her. "That's old news—like a year old. Did you just hear about it?"

"No wonder people keep throwing themselves at you," Emma said with a slight disdain. "With everything you own, they'll be clamoring to be on top if they manage to land you. Just be very careful, okay? Don't fall for someone like that bitch Amber Heard."

Emma and I had encountered Amber during the filming of Draculein. Emma was vocal about her feelings towards her, especially after Amber had dismissed her face-to-face, claiming Emma wasn't pretty enough to be my sidepiece.

I kicked Amber out from the set, and she went to search for other targets after failing in her attempts to get together with me.

"Emma, I need to tell you a secret," I whispered conspiratorially, lowering my voice.

Her eyes lit up with excitement, and she leaned in closer. "Ooh! I love secrets!"

"I'm dating someone," I confessed, keeping my tone low.

Emma gasped, her surprise palpable as she urged me to spill the beans. Vanessa's expression shifted to one of confusion, not expecting the conversation to take that turn.

She remained silent, glancing at Emma and I with anticipation. However, I never revealed the name of my mystery date, leaving Vanessa feeling a little disheartened.

When Vanessa noticed my teasing gaze, her shyness returned. "Yeah, I'm dating someone, but she wants to keep it a secret for some reason," I whispered, maintaining the playful streak.

"Maybe she's ashamed of you," Emma teased back, her expression mock-sympathetic.

"Maybe she is," I replied, smirking. A slight cough from Vanessa broke the moment, and she attempted to change the subject, but she had missed her chance.

"Oh, heads up. You might need to give your girlfriend a warning about this one," Emma advised, her gaze drifting to someone approaching us. "I don't think you can handle the fallout by yourself."

I hesitated to disclose that it was Vanessa I was dating, but I was curious as to why Emma felt that way. Suddenly, it became painfully clear when an older man accompanied by a young, voluptuous model approached us.

The old man was Fred Upton, a former United States House representative, and the model was his niece, Kate Upton.

"Edward! Great to see you here," Fred said, his voice booming with friendliness. I met him multiple times before.

After he resigned, Fred acted as a consultant for various businesses. I met him through Eve—Pepper's mother. It turned out that Upton's great-grandfather was a co-founder of an appliance company, so the Saltzmans and the Uptons had a long history and were pretty close.

"Good to see you, Fred. And Kate, you look fantastic," I greeted politely, offering a warm smile.

Vanessa subconsciously squeezed my arm tighter as her gaze landed on Kate's tight white dress, accentuating her gravity-defying bosom. The sight left her speechless.

Kate brushed her hair behind her ear, feeling a bit shy as she met with me face to face.

"Edward, nice to meet you again." She said with a slight blush on her cheek.

...

During the ride home, the atmosphere was tense. Vanessa turned her attention to the window, avoiding any attempt at a conversation.

"I didn't do anything wrong," I sighed, feeling the weight of the moment.

Vanessa turned completely away from me, her silence palpable.

"She wants to meet for dinner," I explained, trying to clarify. "I rejected her and told her to come to the company instead. I kept it professional. She's the niece of someone I know; I couldn't just dismiss her like that." I attempted to defend myself, but Vanessa remained sulky.

The mental clash of seeing Kate's curves seemed to have left a mark, and Vanessa already had the sense that I'm a chest man.

"Have you thought about what to do yet?" I asked, seeking to shift the topic. But Vanessa didn't respond.

"Maybe we can go to the amusement park?" I suggested, hoping to lighten the mood. It caught her attention momentarily, but she fell back into her sulkiness.

"What about a club? A party? Or maybe get some food?" I ramped up my suggestions, eager to cheer her up.

"Dance." Vanessa suddenly replied, her expression stoic. "I feel like dancing."

I nodded, relieved at her shift. "Dance it is."

"Not clubbing, though. We should go to a place where we can just dance," she clarified, her lips curving into a small smile as she witnessed my excitement.

I reached for the radio. "Why don't we listen to some music before we get there? Just to get the heartbeats going."

But the moment I turned on the radio, I instantly regretted it.

[Will.I.am – Big and Chunky]

"♫♪ I like them big, I like them chunky! (Chunky) I like them big, I like them plumpy

(Plumpy) ♫♪"

I quickly shut off the radio, glancing at Vanessa, who had once again sunk into her sulking demeanor.

"Take me home, Edward," she demanded, her tone firm.

"Ffffffuck," I cursed under my breath, feeling a sense of defeat.

The next day arrived pretty quickly. There were a lot of rumors circulating online and a flirty picture of me and Vanessa was shared over a million times. But since there wasn't any confirmation from any of the involved parties, the rumors couldn't be confirmed.

"Maybe her mood will get better today." I said, wishfully thinking.

...

[General POV]

New York, Saturday Night Live office.

Bill Hader and Jason Sudeikis listened as another SNL cast member voiced their concerns.

"The ratings keep dropping. We need to change the way we do things around here," one of the show's producers said before turning to Jason.

"Jason, you're our only connection to Edward Newgate. Can you try to pull him in for a show? We need to bump those numbers up—otherwise, we're going to lose half the staff."

Jason had been working on this universe's version of Modern Family, and his popularity had exploded. Still, he made a point of staying connected with his SNL family and had offered to help whenever they needed it.

"I mean, I do have his cell number. But I don't know if he'll do it. Oh! I know how we might get him on board. There's this guy he said he likes working with... Um... what's his name again?"

Jason snapped his fingers a few times, trying to jog his memory.

"Right! Julio Torres. He spoke really highly of him."

Bill Hader looked confused. "Julio, the new guy? How does Edward Newgate even know our newbie writer?"

Jason shrugged. "I don't know. That's just what I remember—though I could be wrong. Why don't we meet with the guy first? See if he actually knows him."

The reason Edward wanted to work with Julio Torres was because Julio had created the iconic SNL sketch Papyrus. He had also worked on Santa Baby and The Actress. Edward admired his absurdist comedic style and would jump at the chance to collaborate on a skit.

The SNL members were all confused when they met with Julio. They couldn't see how this guy had gained Edward's attention. Still, they decided to give it a try and offered Edward to become the guest host for the next Saturday Night Live.