When Immortal Ascension Fails Time Travel to Try Again-AFS 2 (April Fools Story 2): Strange Flame Strangeness - (1) - The Problem

AFS 2 (April Fools Story 2): Strange Flame Strangeness - (1) - The Problem

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The fire spun under my massive white cauldron in the center of my mech engineering lab. It turned white hot, sending a wave of heat toward me that would have burned my skin if my physique had been less than S-rank. The scent of caramelized mushrooms wafted toward me.

“...”

Goddamn it! If it had worked like it was supposed to, it should have melted into a liquid, not cooked itself.

The ingredient I placed inside wasn’t melting, even with the hottest flame I could manage from my over-engineered earthen flame base. It was also one of the necessary ingredients in my Perfected Core Dan, the pill I needed to correct my imperfect golden core.

“Fairy Lin, I don’t think it’s working this time, either.”

I scowled at Spring. “That’s obvious.”

He picked up the blood red mushroom with his bare hands. “Have you tried cutting it up first?”

“If you keep holding that, you’re gonna get the shits.”

His eyes went wide, and he quickly dropped it back down onto my work table.

“It’s called Red Incontinent Mushroom for a reason.” I pulled out a sanitary wipe and threw it at him. He wiped his hands thoroughly, but his cheeks almost turned the same color as the mushroom. “And no. I haven’t cut it up. While that would work for some things, it would ruin this ingredient.”

I had only one of most of the other ingredients, so I had to test my new alchemy setup on this mushroom first. The issue I was running into was that some plants had evolved over the past billion years or so.

I moved over to the wall and used a SciFi-looking switch to turn the fire off with a clunk sound.

“What I need is a damn strange flame.”

“A what?”

“They are natural treasures that take ages to form.” Was it possible that those existed in this universe?

While I was sure this universe had the right stuff to make them, that didn’t mean it had them. It might still be too soon since spiritual energy returned.

“Fairy Lin, I need a better description if I’m going to look for one.”

“They usually form in places with eternal heat, but in a weird way. For example, constantly active volcanoes, hot springs that actually heal, or maybe a star that gives off coldness. Odd places like that. They are usually the cause of a fantastic unsolved yet enduring mystery.”

I crossed my arms and grinned. “Know any place like that?”

His eyebrows rose in shock. “Actually, I do!”

On his light brain, the minicomputer he wore around his wrist, he opened up a video and played it. It showed a jungle on a planet somewhere. In the middle of this jungle was a massive volcano with an active pool of lava at its center. He zoomed in onto the center where the pool sparkled with a pink, blue, and yellow light.

“Do you mean something like this?”

I grabbed his forearm and leaned in close to the video. I couldn’t feel the spiritual energy, but I had a feeling that if I was there, it would feel like sparks against my skin, or a glitch in reality. Of the strange and powerful.

That was a sign of a strange flame!

I looked up at Spring’s face. “Where is this? Can we go right now? Do we need to buy this planet to remove anything from it?”

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“Actually, that’s one of the reasons I came here.”

I let his arm go and narrowed my eyes at the young man. “There is a catch.”

“My sister,” Liu YaoYao the protagonist of this world, “is going to be taking part in the Inter-School Mech Survival challenge as Prince Chad’s mech engineer. I joined up so I could protect her.”

So he was being a good brother. Well, with Chad there she didn’t need him... then again, from what I could recall of this world’s plotline, maybe she did need some help. The Mech Survival Challenge was a story arc that brought the main couple closer together and ended up revealing that she had an SSS-rank for her physical, mental, and spiritual attributes.

Of course, that only happened because shit went down. Dangerous shit.

“And I wanted to ask you if you’d join me as my mech engineer. With you on our team, we can help our First Royal Military Academy beat all the other schools.”

Ah, yes, the minor schools who existed just to be beaten by the protagonist team. Couldn’t have a story without them.

“And since we’ll be in the area, we can pick up your strange flame.”

“Send me the rules, so I can make sure it’s okay to take resources from the planet while we’re there.”

He blinked. “Will a rule like that stop you?”

I grinned. “Of course not. I just need to know how sneaky I need to be about it.”

He nodded, opened a file and flicked it over to my own light brain.

I opened my light brain to review the rules. Ugh. I missed jade slips. Reading the normal way took too much time. “By the way, did Jennifer and Derrick join the team?”

“No. They’re taking this semester easy after having fought so hard in the mother ship mission. They’ve also started dating, so it’s hard to be around them because they keep feeding me dog food.”

Right, that was a phrase here. To ‘single dogs’ watching couples be lovey-dovey was ‘eating dog food’.

This just reminded me that this was a SciFi era with more modern ideas of relationships and advanced, foolproof contraceptives! There also weren’t any demonic cultivators or rogue assholes using people as cauldrons. According to the files I saw, there also weren’t any STIs since the advanced medicine had long since put an end to those. If I wanted to, I could casually Netflix and Chill in this universe with little to no repercussions!

Ha! As if. I’d rather play with mechs and cultivate. From what I could remember from my college days, it wasn’t worth it. There were more productive ways to spend my time.

Also, from what I could remember of the original text, the author of this universe was a fade-to-black kind of author. Likely because dealing with frustrating Chinese censorship was too troublesome. If I did do anything, who knew if my experience would also be fade-to-black? And what was the point in that case?

“Good for them. Life is too short for mortals, so they should find love where they can... as long as they wait until they’re at least 23 to marry. Or maybe 230? Whatever.”

“... Fairy Lin, most people only live to 300.”

“That young?! This universe is all messed up.”

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He sighed.

I finished reading through the rules. “Looks like we can use up the resources while we’re there, but we can’t take anything off the planet. All the beasts we kill there are property of the military, but they give us points that count towards our final score. If we score high enough, we can use our points for some high-quality things that are especially good for mech engineers.”

“That’s why my sister wanted to participate.”

“You’ve been calling her your sister often. It seems like you’ve gotten closer to her.”

He nodded.

I smiled. “Good. I’m glad you’ve found your blood-related family.”

“Actually, that’s the other reason I wanted to talk to you.”

I raised an eyebrow.

“Liu YaoYao has decided that she’s not willing to be adopted by your parents.”

“Well, that is her choice. Kind of a stupid one, in my opinion, but it is what it is.” Protagonists often made choices like this because it was supposedly more honorable to struggle and succeed on their own. Of course, then they just go and marry a rich prince anyway. Fuckin’ ridiculous fools.

“And she requested that I come under her family registry.”

I jerked my head up from my light brain to stare at this little side character.

“I’m not sure what to do.”

“Even if you choose to return to your family, I’m certain the duchess and her consort will still support you.”

“I’m not hesitating because of them.”

What? Was it me? “You never thought of Victoria as your sister, and I’m even less your sister. I’m not even from this time period.”

“That’s why you worry me.”

“Don’t worry about me and do what feels right to you.”

He bit his lip. “If I choose to return to my family, will you still teach me to cultivate?”

I clasped my hands behind my back like the master I was. My light brain beeped. I flinched. My face burned. I quickly closed out of everything ,then returned to my epic-looking master pose as if I hadn’t just opened a bunch of random apps.

“If you remain adopted, I could teach you because you’d be part of ‘my clan’. However, I never really liked the clan structure. Instead, I’ll take you as my student as part of the first immortal cultivator sect in the new universe. So, don’t let me stop you. Do what you want to do, my nominal brother.”

He nodded.

“Besides, I haven’t taught you anything yet since I’m still deciding on the best cultivation technique for you.”

“More like you’ve been too busy between classes and rediscovering alchemy to work on it.”

“...” Why’d he have to go and point out the truth? “Whatever! Just sign me up. I need to get my hands on that strange flame as soon as possible."

“Don’t worry. It starts this weekend.”

“...” This... “Are you a fucking lunatic! What do I have to prepare? Why didn’t you ask me to join sooner?”

I sent a flick of spiritual energy at his glabella.

He frowned and rubbed at the spot I hit him. “But I’ve already prepared everything. You just have to show up.”

Yeah, right. Like I’d trust him to prepare everything. I’d have to study the planet’s terrain, the local beasts, and check out what shitty standard mech the school issued participants. There were far too many things I needed to get done and not enough hours to do it.