Cartel Experience-Chapter 54: Trauma and the Darkness That It Comes With.

"You like it?" César asked back, his voice still a calm one as he stared into her eyes while he wiped her tears on her face... but it started to look like he was hitting on her more than anything else, though Clara liked it.

She liked the idea of causing pain to those who had hurt her, of making them feel everything she had felt, of making them suffer as much as possible. It made something inside her shiver with excitement, because to her, it felt like she had just made a deal with the devil standing in front of her.

The devil that looks human, acts human, and has a name and yet, there was something about him that felt... angelic?

The way he came into their life, the way he offered help to Daisy out of nowhere, help that everybody else declined... the way he threw himself in to protect them, to save her, like nobody else would have done, and now he was offering more... and that touch, the way his fingers brushed against her face, the way he wiped the tears that had fallen from her eye, it did not feel soft, it did not feel kind nor mean, it felt like he wanted to feel it and touch her pain.

Felt like he wanted to take all her fear, all her suffering.

Something was definitely off about him, she knew it but could not name it with words, and well, he of course was off.

What César had lived through, what he had endured in the different life, it was something that would have broken anyone else. Their minds would have cracked and scattered into pieces that could never be put back together, but his mind built back up and what was born was the perfect being that fit a world of chaos.

Not an evil, not an angelic being, but on the line between them.

Something that looks human and behaves like a human. Something that can touch like a human, and even though understanding how dangerous he is... she liked it more than she wanted to admit, because now, for the first time, she felt she could match him.

She could bring pain, she could cause suffering, she could take revenge.

"I do." She finally answered, her voice quiet as she reached out with her hand to touch César’s face. She needed to feel it for herself. She needed to know that he was real, that he was standing in front of her, that this was not just something her broken mind had created to survive the moment.

She had believed he might be an angel. Something sent down to save them when no one else came. Something meant to protect them, to help them. The way he appeared, the way he acted, the way he offered help without asking for anything in return, it all felt unreal, too perfect to be true... but she accepted it.

Let it be an angel or the devil... she accepted it.

[System: She wants you. Give her a kiss.]

Yeah, well, it was a bit embarrassing... both of them touching each other’s face while staring at each other’s eyes... it seemed like two lovers a second away from fucking.

And it happened. Though César didn’t want it, he only touched her face to be more sure she could push her into helping him, to push the idea that he is safety... but she, on the other hand, got a bit too excited and did it.

She kissed César.

No, it wasn’t a kiss... she went all in, french kissing the shit out of him and for a quick second, César forgot about everything and gripped her ass, but then he remembered that it was bad. Moreover, he knew the reason behind it, so he pushed her away.

"Uh... let’s not." He said as he wiped the saliva off his mouth. "At least, right now." He smiled. "Go and dress up, Clara, so we can talk." He said it, that smile still on his face, the kind of smile that hid the embarrassment and absurdity of the situation between them.

"O-Okay." She said, her face red, as she ran to the bathroom to dress up, leaving César right there with his thoughts.

[System: You grabbed her ass like it is a stress ball.]

For a moment, I forgot about all of it.

[System: About what?]

That trauma thing. When you pull a woman out of hell, they can start feeling things for you. Like their mind grabs onto you because you are the reason they are alive. Trauma bonding or what is that. 𝐟𝗿𝐞𝚎𝚠𝐞𝚋𝕟𝐨𝚟𝐞𝕝.𝕔𝕠𝚖

[System: It fits perfectly. You saved her and her child. You became her savior and angel in the middle of terror. That’s why she felt comfortable being naked with you. That’s why she felt comfortable with you knowing you are a killer and that’s why she kissed you after talking about beheading the people who hurt her.]

That fucked...

[System: Congratulations. You have an older woman who has fallen in love with you because of trauma.].

Well, the truth is, César had hoped it wouldn’t happen. From the beginning, everything had seemed fine, but now it was too obvious.

They had done terrible things to her, and now all of that had turned into something like love for him because he was the one who had saved her.

It truly is the worst feeling, knowing why she acts like this.

How strange is the human mind. I only said I will pay with their blood, and she changed instantly.

[System: At least she will help more willingly.]

The System said it right, because after Clara dressed up, they talked a lot. About everything in the city, the political sides, what was best to do. They talked about the gangs, who ruled them, what hierarchy they had, how many people, and everything she knew.

But somehow, César felt something deep inside him.

Using Clara felt wrong. Deep down, he felt it all, the weight of it, the wrongness of it. But they were just NPCs, nothing more... at least that thought helped, once again. The denial of all of it helped... yeah, it always helped him.

So after he got every bit of information he needed, he left Clara and Daisy, but before doing so, he gave Clara more money, told her to stay safe and not move too much, and she gave him another kiss, once again, out of nowhere.

But all those kisses just pushed César further into the darkness than anything else, and maybe that was exactly what he needed.

More darkness as he was ready to pay a visit to Sirina, but more importantly, he was ready to summon the three heads of the Sierra cartel.